The pain and joy of getting rid of stuff.

[Donedirtcheap]

My AAPL stock is down 4 points today cuz of idi@ts hacking celebrity iCloud accounts. To all van dwellers, please line up to buy the next iPhone so I can comfortably retire. Hah! ;-)

Damn rich guys!!!



I"M JUST JOKING. I'm an evil stock holder too.

 

[GypsySilver]

My good China was a problem. I loved it, but everyone else in the family hated it. I finally gave it to a neighbor down the street who collects the same pattern and uses it every day.

I totally understand. I have china and glassware and furniture in storage that I have been paying $90 a month on for 5 years. At the time, it seemed like the logical thing to do and I felt responsible to hold on to family things. But really, the kids aren't interested.

This next step (just one more month and I'm outta here - yay!) will be going back to Texas and putting an end to that. I may keep a few family heirlooms, but most of it needs to go. So far, in my head, I am OK with with that but I know going through those boxes and saying goodbye is going to be hard...

 

[akrvbob]

I've never kept anything in storage, but I am very sympathetic to those who do.

It's not logic, it's not money, it's the essence of your life. For many, many people, it's hard to come to grips with that.

Gypsysilver, you are so right, saying that final goodbye can be very hard! For some people it's like a death in the family. I wish you the very best as you endeavor to do it.

If you can't do it, don't beat yourself up, you are among many others. This life will change you and in a few years you will be able to give it all up without any difficulty. I've seen that over and over again!!

It's all going to work out well in the end!
Bob

 

[jeanontheroad]

We got rid of an entire household full of stuff - twice. Everything we own fits in a 32 MH and the trunk of a Fiesta, and we STILL have too much crap. I know this because I still can't find things. I spend half my life looking for things. The address book has been missing since we left at the end of March. It took over a week to find the imported beer mugs we wanted to give to DH'S brother. Our phones disappear every other day. Now, I have lost the notebook with my shopping list. It's a bright lime green, not something that blends in with the background.

It doesn't help that The Organization King spends half his life finding clever new places for things. Even so IT'S ONLY 32 FEET! If the crap we want can still hide behind a lot of other crap, we have too much crap.

 

[MrNoodly]

...we STILL have too much crap. I know this because I still can't find things.

The other sign is when you find things you don't remember having.

 

[mockturtle]

Because I'm the eldest child in my family, I came into possession of all the family heirlooms, which include huge portraits of grim-faced ancestors and items my great, great grandmother brought west in a covered wagon. I cannot, with any conscience, just toss them but the kids don't have room for them and no one else wants them. So...I have them in storage, along with a few other items that I might need some day. Hah hah. When I'm gone, the kids and grandkids will have to sort it out.

 

[GypsySilver]

I've never kept anything in storage, but I am very sympathetic to those who do.

It's not logic, it's not money, it's the essence of your life. For many, many people, it's hard to come to grips with that.

Gypsysilver, you are so right, saying that final goodbye can be very hard! For some people it's like a death in the family. I wish you the very best as you endeavor to do it.

If you can't do it, don't beat yourself up, you are among many others. This life will change you and in a few years you will be able to give it all up without any difficulty. I've seen that over and over again!!

It's all going to work out well in the end!
Bob

Thank You so much for for your kind words and encouragement Bob

I am in a much better place emotionally than I was 5 years ago and it's time.

It wasn't a question of "live and learn." Five years ago I was losing my home and way of life that I had lived for over 25 years. I lost my job and had gone through a nasty divorce with no legal representation because I couldn't afford a lawyer. I was forced to sell my house for pennies on the dollar and had less than a month to figure everything out. While I was packing I dropped a box and broke my foot and could barely walk. I had to give up my dogs because the future was too uncertain. Many many "things" were sold and given away - and it was just too much to have to also give up the family heirlooms. There were other things happening that I am just not going to go into here. Suffice it to say - it was a hard time and I did the best I could with no one to help or advise. (and I made it and it's all good- yay me!)

It's very easy to judge another persons actions when you have no idea what they have gone through.

~*~*~*~ smiles ~*~*~*~

Thank You Again Bob, and everyone else - I have learned so much from reading here. Your words help more than you know

 

[jeanontheroad]

Mockturtle, I am the oldest female in my generation and I had a lot of stuff like that, too. Some of it really was ugly and to no one's taste. I had hauled it around from house to house out of a feeling of responsibility.

Split the stuff up. My son and his wife liked the silver, but didn't want the china. They took a few of Great Aunt Bessie's hand tatted doilies, but that's just not the style these days.

So, I told everyone that they should take what they liked or it was going to be sold or donated (possibly to a museum for some of your things) or given away. Most everything found a home. The neighbor down the street even liked the china.

 

[mockturtle]

A museum is a great idea, Jean! They probably wouldn't want the portraits but they would be interested in many of the other items. Thanks for the idea!

 

[TraveLyn]

I am also the oldest in my family and only female on both sides so also became the caretaker of people and things. Felt the responsibility to keep family heirlooms. It has taken time to slowly figure out how to let go. The local museum was a good place for some things. It's a process, kind of like pealing an onion for me. Some things like musical instruments/piano the kids rec center loved. Also found some local groups would take donations if it was ok for them to sell as a way to raise funding.

 

[jeanontheroad]

I was thinking of a museum fo the things that Mockturtle had that came west in a coered wagon, in particular. Some things like that just can't be safely handled or kept by the average person. Time makes them too fragile. They need careful, professional preservation. As we have traveled thru the west, we have seen many small local museums that are restoring and preserving historic homestead buildings, and are trying to refurnish them with authrntic peices. He family will know where it is. They can visit it and even have it labeled with their ancestor's name. Mockturtle can get a nice tax deduction if she itemize. A museum donation and family recognition will not create the resentment in the family that selling it would.

If anyone in the family objects, they can take over the storage fees and preservation costs until they are in the position to give the items a proper home. On a catty note, you'd be surprised how fast my relatives' emotional angst over having some of these worn out or downright ugly things leave the family disappeared when they were going to have to take responsibility for them.