The pain and joy of getting rid of stuff.

[MrNoodly]

Living with only what I could fit in a van. Wow, that seemed so radical when I was contemplating this lifestyle. It seemed like deprivation. I had so many cherished possessions -- particularly my art collection. But I also knew I had a lot of stuff that didn't mean much to me, and a lot of stuff I'd forgotten I owned.

But I did jettison everything I couldn't fit in a van. And, surprise, I didn't feel deprived. I didn't feel poor. I felt less burdened.

Then, even more surprising, I started getting rid of more things.

Self-described "author, thinker, life enthusiast," Mark Manson, wrote about his path to minimalism:

Every step along the way, getting rid of what I didn’t absolutely need was painful, but at no point did I ever miss anything once it was gone. Ever.

I have experienced the same thing. For example, I had closets of clothes. Nothing fancy, mostly jeans and t-shirts. But I liked variety. Culling all that down and wearing the same few items of clothing over and over seemed like it would be depressing. But I got it down to what would fit in the van: one bin of pants, one of shirts. After a few months I realized that I had only been wearing stuff in the top half of each bin. And I hadn't felt deprived. Because I had other things going in my life. I had a new adventure. I wasn't using clothing -- or other stuff -- to fill the holes in my life.

When I drive bumpy, rocky, washboardy roads, I get annoyed by stuff rattling around in the back. Some of that rattly stuff is essential, like my tools. But other things? I start wondering if I can jettison more. (And do I need every damn tool I have?) I feel yet another edit session coming on -- and I just went through a big one less than three months ago.

I know each person's idea of what's essential is different. I don't advocate living like monks. But I've learned what's essential for me, and, more importantly, what things really aren't, what things I don't miss that I was certain I would. That has been the big lesson from the past year.

 

[janncoo]

MrNoodly, well said. Jan

 

[wagoneer]

I am entering,it can be done?

 

[Theadyn]

Got rid of a huge yard sized sack yesterday, and it was very painful. A lot of personal belongings of my late husbands, including our wedding attire and some of his clothing. I have a few pictures wearing them, so why keep it? It was painful to see them, I admit, so it was good to get that out of constant visual reminder. Does it mean those items didn't mean something? Nope. But it is freeing to know some things live in my memory without having to lug it all with me. I've been getting rid of stuff for 2 years and really haven't missed anything yet.

Like you, MrNoodly, I seem to wear the same thing over and over off a shelf and rarely wear the hanging items, so I feel another purging coming soon. It is very freeing.

 

[Hereandthere]

Bit by bit I'm sorting things in the house. Don't even know if we would full time again, but it feels good to weed!

 

[mockturtle]

Then, even more surprising, I started getting rid of more things.

Yep. The longer I live in my RV, them more things I toss. And I'll be picking up my smaller RV [Tiger TX] in SC next month. It's a good deal smaller with a fraction of the storage space. This may prove challenging but I already pretty well know which 'stuff' I use and which stuff is just along for the ride.

 

[SternWake]

Sometimes Simplicity must be relearned.
I once left LAX with a backpack and a Coffin style surfboard bag, nearly 3 years later when I returned, my possessions weighed less than half as much. Going through customs the agent asked me what I was bringing back that I did not take with me.

Umm, a new camera and a lifetime of memories, nothing else. I was shedding possessions in every location.

Too much storage space seems to require one fill it. I find I use only a fraction of the clothes I carry, a fraction of the tools I need, and so much other crap, cause to keep it elsewhere, requires I drive there to get it when needed.

 

[Vic.]

Every drop I make at the thrift store is easier than the last.

I figured I'd need a trailer to move my stuff the next time I switch cities, but at this rate it'll all fit into the Jeep.

 

[Patrick46]

I've had some really awesome rigs throughout the years.

A '46 Harley that I rode hard for over 18 years, my 1950 Chevy Panel Shop Truck, that was all flamed, lettered and pinstriped, and I built my wife a gorgeous hot '72 Camaro 'SS'. These were almost like my children to me. I built them from the ground up with my own tools, in my own shop, using my own 2 hands. I had a TON of blood, sweat, & tears (& money) into each and everyone of them.

They were all extremely hard to sell.



Man....I'm glad they're gone!!

 

[MattK]

I wonder if humans have some kind of instinct to hold on to things. My 6yo girl will freak out if I want to get rid of old toys that she no longer uses. Personally I can't wait to purge my life, but first I would have to purge my wife;-)

 

[akrvbob]

MattK, no it is not normal human behavior. Hoarding stuff is nearly 100% an abomination of civilization. For the first 2 million years of human and pre-human history mobility was our highest priority and stuff was a hindrance to mobility.

The harsher the environment, the less value humans placed on stuff. When Captain Cook landed on Australia, he offered the aborogines some of his trinkets and not one of them left with any of it.

There are a few exceptions but that's what they are. Even in societies that accumulated stuff, generosity was the highest value in the tribe. To have something and not offer it to someone in need was a great offense. No friend or stranger was sent away hungry even if that meant you went hungry.

Civilization is the great corrupter of humanity.
Bob

 

[MattK]

I wonder if thats why the average size of homes has gotten so huge compared with 50y ago. In my neighborhood everyone has 1 or 2 car garages but when you see inside them they are full of junk not cars.

 

[wagoneer]

My past follows me flea market since 1966 Hard to give/throw away something I paid for most likely a mistake I should move on. Art collection alone would bring 20k plus and not enough wall space in the window van. I have some tough lessons to get close to SOON.

 

[LeeRevell]

You've got that right! My garage holds my KLR650 motorcycle (have not ridden in over two years, needs new tires, which I have).
And my 14' canoe (only ever in the water once, some three years ago!)
And a bunch of miscellaneous 'stuff'.
My three bedroom house has the two smaller bedrooms filled with accumulated 'stuff'.
I have over fifty rifles (half are rimfires), and a half dozen shotguns, half inherited from my late Dad.
A bunch of reloading supplies and ammo - I will never shoot it all.
I could stock a small neighborhood library with books on sundry different subjects.
More clothes than I'll ever wear. Many are too small for me now.

It'll take me some time to offload all the accumulated bric-a-brac of forty years of living alone.

 

[jeanontheroad]

My good China was a problem. I loved it, but everyone else in the family hated it. I finally gave it to a neighbor down the street who collects the same pattern and uses it every day.

 

[mconlonx]

I've now gone through 3 major purges and am anticipating at least one more. First, moved out of a 3br house with full basement into 1br apt. At the time, we were building a house, so much of it went into storage. A few years later, we moved everything into the new house, but having not touched the majority of it in two years, made me wonder how much was actually necessary.

Split with that wife, she got the house, I moved into a studio apt. Still had stuff stored at her place, but got rid of a whole bunch of stuff in the process, found out exactly what I really needed to survive... not much at all.

Moved into a house with wife no. 2 -- she had a bunch of stuff and I added to it with stuff I pulled out of ex no 1's place. Built shelves to finally get all our books out of boxes, ended up measuring out 266 linear feet of bookshelving with books spine-out. Too many books...

We're splitting up, she went to a 1br apt, I moved into my van. Yardsale, lots of stuff given away. Finally parted with things I'd held for way too long. Funny thing was, because it was toward a positive end -- moving into a van, adopting van-dwelling lifestyle -- it really wasn't as hard as I thought to let go of stuff I've been carting around for decades. Realized a lot of it as a anchor, just stuff slowing me down.

And I still have too much stuff, including half a 10 x 10' storage unit. Promise to myself is to get rid of anything which won't fit in the van by Spring. Art given away to relatives, bicycle parts sold or donated. There's still a footlocker of stuff precious to me I'll probably store at my parent's place. I still have 5-6 boxes of books I couldn't bear to part with, but if I haven't missed them by Spring, do I really need to hang onto them...?

In any case, it has been extremely liberating. Parting with things has proven a much better experience than hanging onto them.

 

[caseyc]

For those of you going through the purging process, I can tell you it gets easier each time. I must have been through my own purging at least 5 times in the past decade. My own hardships resulted from breakups of wives/girlfriends, layoffs or reduction in income, etc. My favorite joke I tell is that as a single guy, I've had to buy more brand new beds than any one guy should have to in a single lifetime! New bed sets costs way over a thousand dollars, but are worth next to nothing when you try to get rid of it. That also goes for furniture and other related items. I have now officially learned my lesson. I'm a slow learner!

 

[Patrick46]

I have now officially learned my lesson!

You say that nowwwwww.....!

 

[Donedirtcheap]

"Civilization is the great corrupter of humanity.
Bob "

People are waiting in line for a week to get an I phone. To heck with humanity, these people know what's important! I PHONE I PHONE I PHONE

 

[caseyc]

My AAPL stock is down 4 points today cuz of idi@ts hacking celebrity iCloud accounts. To all van dwellers, please line up to buy the next iPhone so I can comfortably retire. Hah! ;-)