Hi, losthighwaydrifter. First, I want to commend you for rising above your childhood experiences, and making a good life for you and your family. That sort of focus and perseverance is an admirable trait. It seems to me, from my own experience, that many who have this trait do find it hard to empathize with people who don't appear to share their 'work ethic?' In some cases, I won't hazard a as at the statistics, this may be true. In many cases, that I know of personally, life can quite simply just wear a person down or circumstances can erode away at a life savings. The main handicap, with a lack of empathy, comes when a false sense of pride narrows your thinking and leaves you unprepared for a time when you can't just work more hours or take on another job or send less. If your identity is centered on what you have achieved through your hard work, or based off what you do - losing that ability is devastating and the 'loss of identity' can be crippling.
Anyway, sorry. I wasn't intending on being preachy. Your original post has been mulling about in my mind and the plus side of typing fast is what is in the brain usually ends up in the post. Also, a negative side. Because, well. Rambling.
------------------------
From your original post: "...[font='droid sans', sans-serif]I feel I got to say this and not judging or looking down on anyone I mean I am heading in to this life full force. but for a group of people depending on with unconventional living in a vehicles. I am amazed at the level of complete lack of knowledge most people I talk to have with things and basically lack of life skills.[/font]
[font='droid sans', sans-serif] Tired of paying rent? I get it but why were u paying rent not owning a place? in there 60s living like there 20s? no $$ savings? assets? I mean I'm venting. I mean if $ is a problem stop spending and work more. I came from a VERY bad childhood (drug addict parents) dad (was biker and heavy in a club)was murdered when I was a teen. I had NO help support just a desire to not be broke and hungry and made a very good living. worked 2 jobs worked sick/hurt saved did what ever I could to make $$$...."[/font]
[font='droid sans', sans-serif]------------------------------------------------------[/font]
[font='droid sans', sans-serif]Why pay rent? I can only speak for myself, so what I have to say is anecdotal at best. I was a home owner. Loved my home. Lost it, due to circumstances outside of my control. I could elaborate on this, but I won't. Most of us have tragic tales from our pasts. I won't burden the masses with mine. [/font]
[font='droid sans', sans-serif]Back to rent, for many many years I missed having my own home and considered buying one but chose not to. I didn't want to take on the financial burden of home/appliance maintenance and costs, as well as property taxes, landscaping/lawn maintenance. Owning a home is not necessarily cheaper. Also, because of the reason I 'lost' my home, I moved around a fair bit. I was afraid to be in one place too long. As a single mother of 4 sons, saving money was hard. Much of the time is was just a matter of simply trying to survive one month to the next. Half my income went to pay for childcare, while I worked the long hours necessary for a single provider to make ends meet. At the same time, I was ill. I have Lupus. The long hours, pain and sickness wore me down to the point that my ability to work diminished exponentially. Any money I did manage to save, went to car repairs or other numerous life expenses. [/font]
[font='droid sans', sans-serif]Working more? The first 20 years of my career I worked 84+ hours a week, working Turnarounds at an Exxon Refinery. 12+ hours a day, 7 days a week for months on end with a couple weeks off once the project was completed only to 'turnaround' and do it all over again on the next project. [/font]
[font=droid sans, sans-serif]Spending less? When you are living month to month, and worrying about feeding your kids and keeping the utilities paid, you can only DREAM of having money to blow. [/font]
[font=droid sans, sans-serif]Through it all, my kids and I were never homeless and we survived and I hope even thrived despite the circumstances. [/font]
[font=droid sans, sans-serif]Now, they are grown and no - I don't want to pay rent any more, but only because I can't stand the idea of being tied down in one place without having the resources to travel. I'm on a fixed income. Thankfully, I did work many hours and so my Disabillty is more than many less fortunate have to live on so if I work things right I can have my home and drive it too.[/font]
[font=droid sans, sans-serif]Originally I had looked into an RV. After speaking with friends who have lived long-term in RV's and researching all the different types and logistics in traveling in one, I came across some videos on YouTube that opened my eyes to a different option. One I'm very excited about.[/font]
So, in regards to empathy. I have it, because I can relate, but I know that different perspectives lend toward less empathy and a frustration toward people for not understanding why they don't pull themselves up by their bootstraps and do better. If you find yourself, in the future, meeting new people who are living a Nomadic Lifestyle, maybe take time to hear their story and recalibrate a little bit of your perspective ?
Best wishes on your new journey.
Charlotte
