Money/job issue is my biggest obstacle to living the RV life

[akrvbob]

Let's stay on topic, which is not meatloaf pans or cooking.
Bob

 

[Katewels]

I first have to say I only read through the first 8 pages of this thread so I hope what I am about to say is still relevant. 

I think I was in somewhat of a similar situation as the original poster. I had a job that I hated and I felt stuck. I didn't think there was anything else that I could do. I had the same victim mentality. I just couldn't find a better job. If someone offered suggestions I had 10 excuses of why it couldn't work.

One day I came across a Graphic Design program at a college that was about an hour away. I decided to go for it. I took as many classes a semester as I could afford. I didn't want to go in debt for it because I had no idea if I would ever get a job as a Graphic Designer. Before I had even finished the program I had a job as a Graphic Designer. I did that for 4 years.

I then thought I would like to teach at my churches' school. I started taking classes to get my credentials. Again I had no idea if I would ever get a job there but I knew I wanted to be ready if the opportunity came up. Before I was finished I was being asked how long before I had my credentials? A position had opened up. I have been teaching there for 7 years.

I am now looking into this mobile lifestyle trying to figure out if it is for me. If I decide to go for it I will figure out a way to make it happen even if it involves giving up some comforts.

I think back on the 23.5 years that I stayed in that job I hated and I realize now that I was only "stuck" because I had convinced myself I was. We all make choices. 

Sooner or later you are going to get the fight to get out of your situation. Maybe you will get the skills you need to create an online job. Maybe you will continue to blog even after you have "lost interest" because you know that it may be your last best shot to change your situation, maybe you will begin living "houseless" even if it's a bit uncomfortable so you can pay off your bills and save for the rv you want. And when you do, you will realize that your situation was about 80% mental. 

I just hope it doesn't take you as long as it did me.

 

[GaiaGoddess]

I actually think you've done a few things very well, your low housing expenses are a great example of not abusing credit to purchase a depreciating asset or wasting money on rent.  The reason (personally) I'm not lavishing you with credit for it is because you said your biggest obstacle is money - kudos might make you feel better, but I have a sense you already know what you're doing well on, and you seem pretty upbeat in general.  If you need a few more attaboys or a cheer-leading squad just say so and I'd be happy to oblige!  

It isn't that I need kudos, exactly, it's that I am being judged for having poor money handling skills and no one is noticing what I am doing right, which I feel 99% of what I do with my money is right. I suppose I could spend less money on going to the movies (which usually is only because I am hanging out with my friends and that's all they ever want to do, and it beats sitting home alone). But the measly $20 a month I might spend on movies isn't enough to pay off my credit card. It would take 9 years to pay it off with that money I saved from not going to movies. See why I think small amounts don't matter? They can add up, yeah, but I don't have that many small frivolous things TO add up. Going to movies is the only thing I don't need to spend my money on, I just do it because everyone needs a social life and like I said, it beats sitting home alone. But I never go to a movie I don't want to see, I usually do want to see them, I would just prefer to wait for it to be on Netflix but my friends are movie addicts and usually go to a few every week.

If you want an honest assessment based on the (limited) information I have about your financials however, it's that you are a walking fiscal crisis that is one accident away from very hard times.  We've got a social safety net in this country, but it's not always the softest of landings.

Oh trust me, I am aware that I am one misfortune away from totally ruining my life, but what can I do about it? I do have car and home insurance though, so I guess i'm safe that way. But i have no health insurance and if I were to get into an accident or get really sick, I'm screwed. 

In my comparison I said we have two people, with two cars, and health insurance for both of us and we spend less combined than you (maybe) do now for just yourself, unless you spend less than ~$16,500 pear year.  If you had a roommate, sure you could spend less individually which would be great, but right now you're outspending two people's needs, not just one.  I can only say that as a guess, because you've never been clear enough about your income or spending to draw a real conclusion and I've had to base my math on estimates.  

I thought I was VERY clear, I even gave you 4 actual paycheck numbers, and I posted what I spend every month. Those amounts are averages, because most of them fluctuate, so it's the only way to show you without actually typing out a whole years worth of bills, that is just too much work. The averages should be good enough. When I filed my taxes this year, it said my yearly income for 2015 was $14,428. That's about what my bills come to for a year, about $1200 a month give or take. It's so close.

I've said what I think your annual income should be, and there is a large unexplained gap between what you say your monthly income is and what it should be based on your hours and your hourly rate.  Either you don't end up working at least full time, or you've got a few hundred dollars a month in expenses that aren't being accounted for here.  It might be none of our business, but that's potentially thousands of dollars yearly that could be put on the debt, or towards savings.  That's one of the problems with not having a budget, and it's not just you - everyone loses track of things if they don't keep their eye on them closely.

I don't see a gap. The only explanation is my extra money is going to my credit card, and/or I am not working as much overtime as you thought. It isn't constant, it fluctuates. My paycheck I just got for last week was $270. They vary depending on how much overtime we worked and how many days I missed.

The last thing I want to do is drive you away or keep you on the defensive just because you might think I'm being some kind of sadist meanypants, so if you honestly don't want us digging too deeply into your financials just say the word!  Sticking around for a friendly community is going to be better than leaving in a huff due to a few Personal Finance 101 nerds!

Oh you won't drive me away, lol I will continue to reply to posts as long as there are more to reply to.

 

[GaiaGoddess]

Hey, Gaia.

There are some ways in which I can relate to you. I'm also under 100 pounds and not able to lift minimum weights. I also have social anxiety and can get panic attacks from a phone call. I, too, am sentimental and hang onto "priceless" items with a death grip--in fact, I would go so far as to say I have hoarder tendencies, which I have to work hard to keep in check in order to keep my life functional.

It's nice to know there are others out there with the same set of issues! I don't think I am as bad as you as far as keeping items around, I regularly purge my stuff for Goodwill, and I love that feeling of having less stuff. Right now I think I have the least I have ever had in my life. I know I could fit all the important stuff into an RV.

I've also moved out from living with my parents because it literally made me suicidal--it is simply not an option for my mental health. Like you, I realized I would rather be homeless than that.

I'm glad you can relate. How old are you, if I may ask? I was ok with living with my mom when I was in my 20's, but it isn't ok when you're 40. I will be 44 in a few weeks and have been out of my moms for a year, I lived there for 5 years after I got laid off from a good paying job and realized I can't afford to live in an apartment alone anymore. I couldn't find anyone to live with me, and went back to mom's reluctantly. I wasn't ready to buy an RV at the time (no savings, unemployed). I could have lived in my car, I suppose, but maybe I exaggerated a bit when I said I'd rather be homeless, lol If I were to lose everything NOW, I would do it differently though, I have a tent, I would "live" in that in campgrounds and pay for that by taking whatever odd jobs I could get, I was just checking Craigslist last night and I wouldn't be ashamed to take one of those modelling jobs for a few grand (yeah thats what they said they were paying!) When I moved in with my mom, I had no idea how bad it would be, that's why I did it. But now I know, and I will do anything to avoid that again.

I do not "save money in areas where it doesn't matter to me." It matters to me alright, I just don't have the money for it! Like you, my health is important to me and I need to eat healthy. But some months I couldn't. I literally did not have the funds for it. So I ate unhealthy and got sicker. Some weeks I alternated between not eating and eating small amounts of food bank food that made me nauseous to the point of sometimes vomiting, much as I tried to keep it down. I actually went on dates as a strategy to get solid meals.

Well there's something I hadn't thought of, lol I am not sure if I could morally live with myself though knowing I am using guys for dinner. And right now I have a boyfriend so I couldn't do that anyway, lol As for eating unhealthy, that sounds horrible, I have never thrown up from eating unhealthy food. 

I am honestly shocked that you bought gifts. I have done entire years when I did no gifts at all...and felt HORRIBLE about it, mind you. It was anything but easy for me. But I didn't have the money. It wasn't there. It wasn't possible. Kids will have to learn to understand when something isn't possible. That's life.

Last Christmas I stood up in front of my relatives and gave a tearful speech about how my presents for them are all re-gifts of items I already had. I told them I won't be offended if they swap or don't like them, but it was all I could afford to give and I wanted each person to know I thought of them.

I can understand you not wanting to do something like this. I didn't want to either! But what were my choices? I didn't have the money. Other years I have written personal letters as a gift, or for birthdays spent some extra time with them.

My nephews are like the kids I'll never have, so I dont want to give them a speech saying I can't afford gifts for them. I can't regift for them, nobody buys me toys, lol Last year I skimped on everyone else though, I work at a place that holds garage sales for the items we make, and I spent about $15 on a huge bag of stuff with at least 2 items for everyone. I am sure they thought I was cheap for giving them generic inexpensive items, but it was something. I also bought a bag of 100 can koozies for $2 (work had a sale on them) and I used puffy paint and wrote everyone's name on one and gave that to them. Cheap gift a ten year old could have made, but I was saving money.

I guess I want to thank you, in a way. You've reminded me of why I'm doing this. Why I make these sacrifices. It's so that I don't end up like you. I suppose you might not want to end up like me...but I've got solid hope for a brighter future, and each year has been significantly better than the year before for the past 5. Can you say the same?

Yeah this year has DEFINITELY been a LOT better than the past 5, for sure! I went from living with my mom, being unemployed and suicidal, to having my own place, a good paying job, and a boyfriend. I am excited about my future, I feel hopeful. I usually feel hopeful as long as I am not living with my mom, lol At least I am not depressed, I would rather be living check to check than depressed that I am in my 40's living with my mother.

 

[GaiaGoddess]

here is what I learned from this thread.  I had no idea what so ever you need a special pan to cook meatloaf in,  I guess I have been doing it wrong all these years.  lol.  highdesertranger

lol...what do you make it in? I don't have anything else that even goes in an oven besides a pizza pan which shouldn't even be called a pan, it's flat, lol

 

[GaiaGoddess]

they have false bottoms to let the grease drain

the bigger question is,bread crumbs or oatmeal?

lol That's crazy, talk about spending money frivolously! I'm not even this much of a cooking snob to need one of these, lol

 

[GaiaGoddess]

It's not the survival things that you aren't willing to give up, it's the thing that many of us consider luxuries.

I love a good shower too, but not enough to give up traveling for it.

I loved my house. but not enough to continue working just to pay for it.

I gave my grandmother's china to my ex-sister-in-law and my grandmother's hand-made quilts to my sister.

I sold everything that had some intrinsic value and took a picture of the rest before I threw it away.

That's what I mean about where a person's values are.  Mine are in having a free lifestyle, yours are still in having all the things you've grown comfortable with.

As Bitty said, giving up things is hard, but for many of us, giving up on the lifestyle would have been harder.

I'm not sure what you are referring to... the only thing on this list I want is a shower. I will sell my trailer, I don't have anything passed down to me from relatives, every single thing I own is either there to help me earn money or because you need it (clothes, shoes, dishes, a bed, etc.) Are you talking about my photo albums? I explained that i have lost information on computers and hard drives before so I don't trust those. The risk of losing my photos in a fire is much lower. That's really the only thing I can think of that most of you would probably not keep. But it's photos of my entire life, starting from when I was a baby until now.

 

[GaiaGoddess]

I must be the only person who knows about meatloaf pans and ignores them. I bake mine in a well oiled old black iron skillet....with lots of onion and bell pepper and catsoup on top.

Jewellann

I would love a cast iron skillet, I was just at Walmart tonight and saw how expensive they are! It's crazy! Being an avid cook, you'd think I would have sprung for one by now, but I have never really NEEDED one, I just hear about how they are so much better to cook with. But they're so heavy, I hate having heavy things, it makes moving suck, lol

 

[GaiaGoddess]

I just formed mine into a long kind of mound and baked in on a cookie sheet, the way my mother and grandmother did.

So it's not meatloaf but a meatmound?   I guess that would have worked...I thought it was something that needed to be held in so it doesn't leak all over and flatten out, but I stand corrected!

 

[AngryVanMan]

When I filed my taxes this year, it said my yearly income for 2015 was $14,428. That's about what my bills come to for a year, about $1200 a month give or take. It's so close.

sounds good gg, can see if you can find a job where you get full time or miss less days? thats less money than a full time minimum wage job for a year very low

edit sorry thats less money than minimum if thats the gross wage, if its take home you are making the same as a job with only 8.65/hour still bad but not quite as bad. make sure you not looking at magi on 1040 line 6 since thats minus the deductions and exemptions, you want w2 line 1 minus taxes paid lines 2,4,6,17 and then plus any refund if you got one state/federal to get your total.

 

[GaiaGoddess]

I first have to say I only read through the first 8 pages of this thread so I hope what I am about to say is still relevant. 

I think I was in somewhat of a similar situation as the original poster. I had a job that I hated and I felt stuck. I didn't think there was anything else that I could do. I had the same victim mentality. I just couldn't find a better job. If someone offered suggestions I had 10 excuses of why it couldn't work.

One day I came across a Graphic Design program at a college that was about an hour away. I decided to go for it. I took as many classes a semester as I could afford. I didn't want to go in debt for it because I had no idea if I would ever get a job as a Graphic Designer. Before I had even finished the program I had a job as a Graphic Designer. I did that for 4 years.

I then thought I would like to teach at my churches' school. I started taking classes to get my credentials. Again I had no idea if I would ever get a job there but I knew I wanted to be ready if the opportunity came up. Before I was finished I was being asked how long before I had my credentials? A position had opened up. I have been teaching there for 7 years.

I am now looking into this mobile lifestyle trying to figure out if it is for me. If I decide to go for it I will figure out a way to make it happen even if it involves giving up some comforts.

I think back on the 23.5 years that I stayed in that job I hated and I realize now that I was only "stuck" because I had convinced myself I was. We all make choices. 

Sooner or later you are going to get the fight to get out of your situation. Maybe you will get the skills you need to create an online job. Maybe you will continue to blog even after you have "lost interest" because you know that it may be your last best shot to change your situation, maybe you will begin living "houseless" even if it's a bit uncomfortable so you can pay off your bills and save for the rv you want. And when you do, you will realize that your situation was about 80% mental. 

I just hope it doesn't take you as long as it did me.

Well I think it already has, lol I'm almost 44 years old. But I think the age thing is pushing me more than anything else. I don't want to be at retirement age and starting. I want to retire BEFORE I'm in my 60's. I am not sure if being stuck is 80% mental though, for me anyway, it's usually been that I was just unaware of the possibilities. I grew up in a town where most of the residents worked at the same job their entire life. My parents only had one job their entire lives which was the place I worked at for 18 years and I guess that helped cement the idea that this is just what I will do forever. My dad forced me to get that job (literally lining up the interview for me, because he was a big shot there). So I guess I stayed there for 18 years because I didn't want him to get mad at me for "not accepting" what was good enough for him and my mom. They eventually closed the place, after a series of layoffs. So that's about when I started to really question what I wanted to do for a living. I still don't know, lol I just hate work. I hate it because it takes up most of your time, and time is the most precious thing and we never know how much we get. On my deathbed I want to know that I used my time wisely, doing more of what I love than what I don't. I think i've already spent way more time doing what I hate, but there's no way to change that now. I can only change the future, but I see no way to do that when I still need to work. I guess I have a romanticized ideal of how I think life can be, when in reality it can't be that way.

 

[GaiaGoddess]

sounds good gg, can see if you can find a job where you get full time or miss less days?  thats less money than a full time minimum wage job for a year very low

Well I didn't get this job until October of 2015. I got fired from my really good paying job $30,000/yr in January and I couldn't find anything else until April and that was $10/hr but 2 months after that I moved to this place which was too far to drive from that job so I quit and took the first job I could get in this town which was $8/hr. That was the most stressful job I've ever had and obviously didn't pay enough so I took the next job I could get which was $10/hr if I remember, or maybe it was $9? Either way that job was stressful too and still not enough money so 2 months later I finally got this one, technically it should pay more than my bills but I am still paying off my credit card and other emergencies keep coming up. This is one of the only 2 good jobs in this town, and the other I had 2 interviews at but they never hired me. Missing days is not something I can control, I needed to take days off when my dad died, also when we had blizzards and NOBODY went to work. One day the power was out so they made us go home with no pay.

 

[AngryVanMan]

thats what i thought maybe you changed jobs, if you can keep this one going at the 12.45 pay, as long as you miss less than 16 weeks of work for a year you will make more than last year, if you get close to 52 weeks full time at the job you get about 5000 more

 

[GaiaGoddess]

I see no reason to quit this job, there's nothing else around here except that other factory that wouldn't hire me, lol I am actually not hired on permanently though, I'm through a temp agency. If by some miracle I ever get permanently hired, I will get another dollar per hour, and health insurance, and paid time off! But the only way for me to get hired is for 1 of 2 guys to quit and one is my boyfriend who needs the money more than I do, and the other is supporting 4 people so he can't quit. So, not looking good for me.

 

[eoewan]

I've read this entire thread. Stating that to show that I have seen all the suggestions and all the reasons you give of why they won't work. The one thing that hasn't been mentioned is the amount you spend on gas going to visit friends and family on weekends. How about you tell your friends and family that you can not afford to travel to them anymore? They should be willing to travel to you, or, at least meet half way. I truly hope you don't have another justification why this won't work. Think about the gas money you would save. If they can't travel to you then you still have a cell phone and computer. You can facetime with them using Hangout or Skype. Those are free and you can see them face to face.

 

[kayell]

Weird math.

1) You said that you spend $20 a month on going to the movies, yet small sums are insignificant so spending that on you credit card wouldn't make any difference. Yet you say you only spend $20/month on your credit card now. So if you added the movie money to your credit card payments it would double what you pay off. Due to interest and your low income that is not at all an insignificant amount. Small amounts is all you have so you need to use them.

2) You also said that you go to the movies several times a week. Assuming that is only two times there is absolutely no way in this country that you are doing so on $20 a month. Even if you have some amazing unheard of theatre that charges only $5 (please tell me the location of this marvelous theatre) 2 x 4 weeks x $5 = $40 if you don't buy any popcorn or drinks. That's also not an insignificant sum.

Your math has been all over the place in this thread. Please make a budget and use a money control system. The envelope system (google for examples) is the simplest - maybe not the best but easy to follow and a great start. It would also be very helpful to chart every single thing you purchase for at least a month to find out where your money is actually going.
g
If movie going is how you socialize, consider inviting your friends over to watch Netflix at your place and provide popcorn with real butter. BYOB The real joy of movies with friends is in chattering, laughing out loud, talking about the movie and popcorn fights (skip the butter!) None of which should be done in a theatre. It would be great for your budget, great for theirs and more fun even with non-first run movies.

I said I wouldn't be back but you're on the edge of a precipice that you can back away from if you make some changes in your life. There aren't any magic formulas that will let that happen. There's just you and the work you put into changing.

 

[kayell]

Please read this: http://www.thesuccessfulgrownup.com/categories/resistance/item/the-yes-but-syndrome It may give you some ideas.

 

[highdesertranger]

in construction we called it "yah but". highdesertranger

 

[ArtW]

thanks Gary I have never seen one of those. highdesertranger

Me neither, and my Mom cooked meatloaf every monday from the time i remember (me about 5?) to the time she became incapable of being a mother (me 11, I think) she used a bread pan

 

[Gary68]

i recommend the meatloaf pan,i grew up with the normal bread pan stuff and the draining pan is much better,eliminates the slimy greasy bottom

and i use oatmeal and tomato sauce

and gaia,your not that bad off,what 2-4k in debt if you set your mind to it can be paid off in less then a year,you have a roof over your head and a job you like,dont be so hard on yourself