Stealth city life: Good idea to paint a fake contractor logo on the side of your van?

[YetAnotherHuman]

Hello, everyone. This is a great forum, I've been lurking on it for a few years now from time-to-time. Finally made the jump to be a registered user! Keeping an eye on craigslist for my first van and really excited to possibly live in one.

Anyway, I've been toying around with an idea. I am self-employed and it wouldn't be forgery/fraud to place my company name on the side of a van, maybe with a phone number that leads to nowhere.

Something like:

"CompanyName LLC
Your overnight carpet cleaning service."

or 

"CompanyName LLC
Emergency Plumbing Services - 24/7"

or

something similar that alludes to a reason why you would be parked in a neighborhood at 2 am.

If you consistently move around, maybe you would have less people worried about you parking in residential areas?

On the negative side, maybe that would draw more attention to your van and make it easier to remember / identify.

 

[sushidog]

Uh, No. I don't recommend it.

However consider a bumper sticker that says "To report suspicious activity with this van call 1-900-xxx-xxxx." Calling the number bills the person who calls by the minute (say $10/minute rate) while sending the caller through an extensive menu of choices, playing nice hold music while counting down the hold time (from 6 minutes, as you don't want to risk them hanging up prematurely) keeping the caller on the phone for 10 minutes or so (a $100 phone call) before "accidentally" disconnecting the caller - so they call back and repeat the process.

Just kidding folks, please don't try this at home kids!

I actually heard of a variant of this scam with a bumper sticker that said something like "To report bad driving call 1-900-xxx-xxxx." Then whenever the driver needed a little money he would just cut someone off, weave through traffic, etc. before slowing down so all could get a good look at the number to call. The calls and the cash from concerned citizens reporting this bad driver to his company would pour in.

Chip

 

[VanLifeCrisis]

could get a goggle voice number. id use a magnet over painting if youre set on the idea. At a truck stop i use, there are dudes sleeping in vans that say panther transport (legit company). No different than other cargo conversions, relextix in windows, vent in roof.

so blah blah delivery or transport might work..tho might backfire if they require commercial numbers/registration

 

[ZoNiE]

"Stealth Human Transport, LLC"

 

[mockturtle]

If you do, make sure the 'business' is obscure enough that people won't be pestering you for jobs. 

 

[ramblingvanman]

I have been sleeping in cities in large cities for years. I have nothing but a regular conversion van. I have been "knocked" by the police only 4 or 5 times in 6 years. Panama City Beach was 2 of those. Just don't park there.

 

[SoulRaven]

I have a window van, and don't even try to hide what I'm doing. I just don't have much for problems. If the neighbors know you are a harmless camper instead of a possible threat, all is well. I park in the same places for weeks at a time too.

 

[WriterMs]

I can think of at least a few very good reasons NOT to do this off the top of my head:

1. If an LEO is suspicious of your van location, he is going to call the number. Or have headquarters check on the business name if you have no phone shown. He comes up with no real business? You may receive MORE than a knock on the door asking you to move. Now police know you are faking your ID for some reason. and they will assume nefarious.

2. If a resident sees the van and is either suspicious or wants to call about your services, they try to look you up on the Net or in the local phone book. Cannot find you? Now THEY are sure you are a criminal and THEY call the police. And then... see above.

3. Now instead of a blank white van... they DO have a way to easily remember your van. Neighbors won't have to wonder if you are the same van they've seen before.. maybe last week... Now they have a graphic and name to remember so they are more sure. Even if you use a magnetic sign as many businesses do now, if you have to constantly be removing it or remembering whether you've used it in a neighborhood, what is the point?

4. Someone has a leaky pipe and sees you are a plumber (or whatever) and they come to see if you can help and they knock on your door. Not a plumber????? Your sleep or rest is disturbed and you kick off item 1 above.

On the other hand, if you do use your own name or business name with your real number, at least you might avoid problems 1 and 2 above.

My first few minutes of thoughts.. up to you to decide how valid they might be for you.

 

[Reducto]

Anything that makes your van stand out and be remembered when you're back in town a month later is bad. If a cop decides you're a threat and starts questioning you it's bad to have a story that doesn't add up like a sign for a business that you don't have tools for and that doesn't seem to exist.

Also contractor vans have tools in them, making them a potential theft target.

Keep it clean and generic.

 

[LeeRevell]

And the cop may want to see your business license/permit.  Just a thought...

 

[Spirituallifetime]

Business vehicles fall under a different category in traffic stops by law enforcement, they are not private vehicles and can therefore be stopped to be check for permits and be inspected for road safety at any time! An unmarked private van law enforcement must have specific reason to do a traffic stop, they can't do a random stop on it.

 

[offroad]

Just get a sign that says voluntary church transport and counseling service. No one messing with Christian church's moving partitioner around. Go get yourself ordained as minister in training. Have a bible around. -- no one will bother you.

 

[Reven]

Seems to me any marking would be detrimental to stealth... any identifying features that stand out can be remembered. The Grey Man is featureless and passes out of people's memory as soon as he passes.

The ultimate technology would be the SEP Field (it was in one of Douglas Adams' "Hitchhiker's Guide" books.) Thousands of races throughout the galaxy had tried for millennia to develop invisibility, but none were able to pull it off. Then someone invented a much easier and simpler approach: The SEP Field (Somebody Else's Problem.) The field emanated by the SEP generator affected the perception of the observer... anything, no matter how outrageous and noticeable, would just be considered Somebody Else's Problem and ignored.

 

[akrvbob]

I had an atheist friend who put a bumper sticker on his truck that said: "Ask me About Jesus!"

He said it made him invisible!
Bob

 

[Canine]

My view is anything that can be remembered for any reason is less stealthy than plain vanilla. Whether it is a business logo, a bumper or window sticker, body damage, flashy paint or striping, obvious solar panels, higher than normal (lifted), lower ride stance than normal, rims other than stock... Anything can cause you to be remembered and potentially is bad. I say potentially as some forum members have stated that they "hide in plain site" or just don't care.

My places to park are usually motel/hotels, 24 hour stores, Walmarts, big box stores like Lowes or Home Depot, 24 hour fitness type gyms. Since those places see a lot of traffic, the less I stand out the better. That's why I refuse to drive anything with too high a top, or a (fun but no stealth) ex ambulance or small shuttle bus. I figure if I would give it a second glance then others may as well. Lastly, I follow (and don't vary from) a rotating list of parking spots, I currently have 12 spots within a 10 mile area, which allows me nearly 2 full weeks between parking at the same spot. All that effort would be for naught if I had a vehicle that could be remembered.

For those that don't care or don't have any issues, I commend you. For others like me that don't want to be identified as a van dweller, color, condition and overall appearance are critical.

 

[Matlock]

And the cop may want to see your business license/permit.  Just a thought...

Agree... and in my state you need to have commercial plates on the vehicle if your advertising.

I bought a large magnetic sign that I planned to throw on the side of my van when I did weekend furniture restoration work years ago. The second or third time I used it while making a pick-up LEO stopped me. My van license plate wasn't a commercial plate so I had to remove the mag signs or get a ticket. He said I was lucky it wasn't painted on as that would have guaranteed a fine. YEMV

 

[Patrick46]

Agree... and in my state you need to have commercial plates on the vehicle if your advertising.

I bought a large magnetic sign that I planned to throw on the side of my van when I did weekend furniture restoration work years ago. The second or third time I used it while making a pick-up LEO stopped me. My van license plate wasn't a commercial plate so I had to remove the mag signs or get a ticket. He said I was lucky it wasn't painted on as that would have guaranteed a fine. YEMV

I'm not sure where you call home, but in the 30+ years I've been in business (I own & operate a custom sign & graphics shop)...but I've never heard of such a thing...EVER!
I've ALWAYS had my name plastered all over my rigs (it IS my business after all)...and I've never of anyone encountering such LEO nonsense.

I have heard of LEO's asking for CCB#'s, which are supposed to be on all forms of business advertising (including vehicles)

...maybe it's a big city, East coast thing. Glad to be out West.

 

[Canine]

:huh:

 

[Canine]

 

[Canine]