I've found that the problem with the soil around here isn't that it is rocky. It's that it is mostly super-fine, soft sand with some rocks in it. The ground looks more rocky than it really is because the top layers of dust have long since blown away, leaving a layer of rocks on the top. But if you dig down just a couple of inches, it is almost all fine dust with just a few rocks mixed in.
The long stakes are needed just to keep them from being pulled out sideways. They need to be sturdy for just in case you hit a rock. Drive the stakes in at about 45 degrees instead of straight down. Angle the tip towards your tent as it goes into the ground. I use the kind of tent stakes that look like a large, chromed nail, with a green plastic "hook" on the top to keep the tent ropes from slipping off. They are cheaper, easier to drive in, and easier to carry around and pack away. You can get them at the exact same places in Quartzsite (the RV parts tent in Tyson Wells) as those gigantic rebar tent stakes. Mine cost about $1.75 each. I got the medium-length ones (about 14") but I do wish I had gone ahead and gotten the longer ones that are just about 18" long. Again, the ground is pretty soft. I'll probably get some of the longer ones once I get into Quartzsite again.
As to the winds. Yup, they are really pernicious. I have a shower tent that I try to use for my porta-potty. However, for the last few days I haven't been able to leave the tent up. It hasn't blown away or down yet, but it sometimes looks as if it is just about to. Fortunately, I got one of those Green Elephant, pop-up shower tents, so it takes like one minute to set it up or take it down (not counting stakes, which I leave in place till I break camp).
When you choose your tent, choose one that has low, angled sides so the wind will slide right over it. You know, an aerodynamic tent. :-/ Any tent with near vertical sides will have a lot more trouble. Then, try to put your tent on the south side of some big rig (of course ask first). Almost all of the winds so far have been coming straight out of the north. Open your weather app and set Quartzsite as one of the locations. Then check the wind every day to get an idea of what to expect. When the weather app says the wind is over about 11 mph, that is when I have trouble with my shower tent. But a well made, low to the ground, well staked tent should hold up. People have been doing it for years down here.
P.S. Watch out for all the dudes here who will constantly tell you that you need to have the biggest, strongest, sturdiest "whatever" that money can buy. I think they think they get their "Man Points" by constantly pretending things need to be overkill just to get by at all out here. Some stakes that one person recommended (who shall go un-named) cost a whopping $45 each and are meant for holding down cell-phone towers.
