Getting kicked out of my place in 3 days. Back to the van I go.

[Kenny P]

I don’t really know why I felt like posting this but here it goes.
I’ve been with a girl for over 5 years, we have been living together.
The house is in here name. I helped her with $6,000 toward closing costs to buy this house.
I also paid $700 per month to help with the mortgage. Plus tons of money I have spent toward upgrades to this house.
The only problem is that the house is in her name, and she got mad, and now she wants me gone.
I used to have a gmc Safari that I converted, very cheaply, no solar or anything, and I lived in that off and on.
I knew this day would come again where she would get mad and kick me out so upgraded my van to a Ford E350 extended body. I recently converted it, also very cheaply.
So I will be roughing it starting Tuesday.
I don’t think it’s legal for her to kick me out so soon but I don’t care, she is making it hard to stay here, I’ve been sleeping/living in the cold garage the past few days.
The reason she wants me gone is because I’ve been wanting to buy a place of my own, which she has known about since I met her. I have money saved and could have bought a house 2 years ago but I wanted to wait and see what happened to the housing market. Prices are very high.
So I recently got a second loan application in with another lender and also got a real estate agent lined up.
She likes to snoop my phone while I sleep and she saw that I did those things and BAM, I’m outa here.
I think she was hoping I would change my mind and decide to stay with her.
She has two daughters, 11 and 14 who are very misbehaved and disrespectful and it’s just hard to be around.
I’ve always wanted to buy a small house on  an acre or more so I can grow my own food and build a shop and work on things.
I don’t feel like that’s a crime.
Wish me luck.. No sink (yet), no power other than my starter battery (good for charging my phone and HOPEFUPLY making a pot of coffee in the morning).
I will be roughing it.
Rant over.

 

[riptorn]

Been there.
!. No documentation of investment. 
   Call it rent in the wind (I think you know that)
2. Sounds like your dealing with a flake
3. 2 young delinquent daughters in the house. 
   You should have NEVER spent a night in that house!

I raised my daughter alone (now 25) She had lots of sleep overs growing up. I never allowed one unless a mom stayed over to chaperone them. For my safety.

 

[riptorn]

Also since you said no paper work. It's legal.

 

[DannyB1954]

If in your State you can claim domestic partnership, or even real estate partnership, you may be entitled to your down payment and half of what the property increased in value while you were there. Save your proof of helping with the down payment as she can say the $700 a month was just your rent. Renters do not not furnish funds for a landlord's down payment.
Better establish value soon as I think property values will plummet because of Corona.

I once rented a garage from a lady. After cleaning painting installing lights etc, she decided she wanted the garage back for her own use. I removed the lights, returned the single bulb light in the center, and painted the interior flat black, ( was similar to the dirty old wood that was there when I moved in. ). When I moved out she was upset. You didn't need to do that she said. I said I know I wanted to.
Moral of story, do not invest time or money upgrading a property belonging to another. In many cases the landlord will think I can now rent it to someone else for more money.

 

[Bwanderin]

[font=Tahoma, Verdana, Arial, sans-serif]That really sucks and I am sorry to hear of [/font][font=Tahoma, Verdana, Arial, sans-serif]your pain.  But[/font], as you shared, the good news is you can now take back care of yourself and your future.

How many times have you seen people trying to use, manipulate or change their partner or family member to meet their own needs instead of loving, respecting and honoring who they are? It sure messes with your head when you actually realize its happening and its hard to make rational sense of it esp. when you know you've been upfront and clear. Sounds like the signs were there, but being human, we dismiss them - that is until we can't anymore. That's a hard realization. 

Try really hard to be kind to yourself as you get through this one step at a time. Try not to look back too much as you are blessed to have a dream and the means and the courage to go after it.  Glad you have your van!

 

[travelaround]

I agree with the person who wrote you should never have spent the night in the home with two difficult young girls. That's just asking for trouble. You're lucky to get out of the situation without being accused of anything worse than wanting to buy a home of your own.

Good thing you have a nice van to move into. It is a somewhat rough lifestyle but definitely will get you through until you find the real estate you want to buy. Go have yourself an adventure. And seriously, if wanting to buy real estate is what broke up this relationship, then what B and C just said, "Good riddance." Honestly, it seems like it had to be more than that. Maybe there were commitment issues... like, you never even got married, and wanted to live elsewhere?

 

[tx2sturgis]

She must be REALLY GOOD in bed!

 

[JeanInaBox]

Yep..,
You actually are the winner in this situation.

 

[Dingfelder]

Count this as a lesson. I agree with Jean, above, and travelaround. You got off cheap, at least in comparison to what could have happened.

Sounds like you had a lot of hope, but pointed it in the wrong direction. That's always what has hurt me the worst, too. I hope you spend your hope better next time. And in the meantime ... take care of and respect yourself. It's unlikely anybody else reliable is going to do it for you at all, much for any length of time.

Pay yourself first.

 

[1shemp]

Good Luck.

 

[will379]

Two disrespectful teenage daughters? and now she's pissed? I hope youre gone by now you are in VERY dangerous situation

 

[jsudlow]

I feel your pain. 50 days till my lease is up. No one wants to renew or rent to me in my area. Over the last 4 years I've lived here rents have gone from 1400 to 2000 a month. Insanity. I'm looking forward to not being under someone else's thumb and I think you will like that too. Hardships are abound on the road but at least you can call your box your own. I have the same dream of buying land and building a house. Hope you can find some relief on the road

 

[desert_sailing]

Whether something is "hard" or not is entirely a state of mind.  imHo.  Living in a van to save money for a piece of property doesn't sound to be a "hard" way to achieve that goal. In fact I don't see vandwelling as hard in any case.
 
After my folks divorced my mother had a boyfriend and as a "kid" it wasn't easy to deal with. The kids have no idea how to make sense of their feelings. If the kid is sass talking and being disrespectful they have alot going on under the surface and THEIR feelings and concerns take priority over those of an adult that should have figured it out by then. If anyone is being disrespected I personally want to know the source of it. Why don't they respect you?

Of course none of the above matters. You doing what makes you happy is what is needed. I would just hope that you don't get into a splitting pennies escapade with the mama. In the end it is the kids that pay the price. I am sure they have been paying for their mothers cr@p decisions for some time.

I hope you get your van nice and cozy and find a nice piece of land that you can nurture.

 

[maki2]

The OP of this thread has not logged into this forum for more than a month now.

A lot of times people just post stuff to vent their frustrations with a situation, this is one of that type of postings.

 

[desert_sailing]

I need to start looking at dates a bit more.

 

[Trebor English]

This thread had 751 views when I just looked.  It seems that many in this community are interested in the issues even if the original poster has not logged in.  Many people have departed in a vehicle with timing affected by other people.

 

[Seeker/Wanderer]

Wow. Don't even get me started on this topic. I'd be crying and pounding on the laptop. Sounds like you've got it all together. I had to just drive down the road with my fifth wheel and wandered about with my dog for a year or two. It was lonely but I get to wander in the mountains and that's the only peace I could ever find in this life. Honestly I would love to go back out now but I don't understand how anyone is doing this life now with so much closed down. Well anyway dude happy travels and see ya on down the road.

 

[crofter]

For best results, parking your van in the driveway is all anyone should expect, and you can visit as much as you want. If you are financially stable or a generous person, people will always take advantage. Once you move in without a license to do so, you are a goner. Even with the paperwork, if your wagon is hitched to a greedy self serving person, you are a goner. Yes I know I am a tad negative.

No worries, Kenny will come up for air eventually. He is just social distancing somewhere.
-crofter

 

[CRBSOUL]

That pretty much happened to me about a week ago. Except I trusted my girl with all the paperwork and receipts for all our stuff. She got on drugs and went batty. Took everything!! All i have is my Kia soul, some clothes and my job!! I'm ok with that!! She's in jail now. So moving into the Kia with a smile!!
Nothing at all wrong with wanting your own little piece of dirt!! I wish you the best!!

 

[desert_sailing]

She's in jail now. So moving into the Kia with a smile!!

Finding pleasure in others misfortune....gross!