Choosing to be Single and on the Road

[eDJ_]

It was back some time ago now that an older neighbor of mine was showing me this paper back he was reading.
He had taken up with the widow and both were making a new start in life. The book was titled "Blue Highways"
by William Least.  

This Guy had traveled widely in the Army, then driving Tractor Trailers, and working Construction.  He knew the
single life well and living and working while on the road.   They were planning on buying an older RV and him showing her America in a leisurely road trip over the next couple of years.

She had told me that until she met him that she figured she would just content herself to be "Grand ma" (at 47)
and baby sit grand kids.

So, I'm wondering how many here are happily single and content living and traveling in their "vehicles" (whether
they be converted or purpose built travel vehicles ?   Does it ever bother you thinking that you are "missing out" ? 

Recently I read these two articles, one in Time Magazine and the other in my local newspaper. It lead me to
wonder as I've talked to quite a few Men who after a couple of divorces have sworn off Marriage in a traditional sense.  They are looking into buying used RV's and hitting the road just as William Least did to get a new perspective on life.  There are Men now identifying themselves as "MGTOW" men  (Men Going Their Own Way)
and not even concerning themselves with being in a relationship with another Woman.  This isn't a movement
but a "view point or attitude" for lack of better words. 

When I'm out on the road in my part of the world I see more and more of these former Used Car Lots filled with small wooden sheds and some are even set up to look like "tiny homes". The signs state zero down,
no credit checks, rent to own.  The most expensive being less than $2000 and a suitable cabin for hunters and fishermen.  It would seem like more and more people are interested in living single today whether landed or mobile. 

So the question, are you happy and fulfilled living the mobile life ?  How long have you been at it ?  Do you see
yourself continuing your present trend ?  What would you have to say about your life ?

Newspaper Article  Fulfillment and the Single Life

http://triblive.com/opinion/tompurcell/9069867-74/married-single-feel#axzz3mHYiEIMZ



Time Magazine:  Monogamy isn't Natural but it's Nice

http://time.com/4028151/david-barash-is-monogamy-over/

 

[Canine]

Life is good.Hope I am never single again.Or homeless.

 

[Almost There]

Well, I'm really happy being single as compared to past experiences!

And from past experience I'll be really happy to be back on the road again full time - I'm on the countdown stretch now.

This time I get to do it a little different that last time but the 14 years of full time on the road taught me a whole lot. When I was on the road before I was limited by either time or money from fully exploring each new neighborhood. Now as a new retiree I can do what I want with few constraints.


As to what I'm missing out, not much that I can't compensate for some other way. I won't list all the things I don't miss - it would sound too much like a tirade.

I can see myself doing this in one form or another until I can no longer do it. When I feel it's time to quit the constant driving, I'll pick 2 spots and do a six month commute. When that's no longer feasible I'll get someone to drive me or I'll fly. When that has to come to an end, yes, a tiny home is what I want. If I make it to the point where I can no longer safely stay on my own, I'll have to resort to communal living or a nursing home but I'll face that when the day comes...like maybe in 30 years...

 

[SternWake]

I am not travelling as much as I should, but most all my previous travelling has been alone.


I would like a female travel companion, but I have no faith whatsoever that I could find, in S California, a female who I could get along with, well enough to travel with, not that I am actively searching.  I've given up.

I have extremely low tolerance for irrationality, games, and the culturally acceptable and widely displayed misandry is a huge enraging turn off.  I will not be treated like a buffoon servant that men are apparently supposed to accept these days.

So I will remain alone.

So be it.

 

[rvpopeye]

I've been traveling alone for most of my life , there have been a few women but they all wanted me to leave the road and "settle down".
NO WAY ! I'll stick to this wonderful lifestyle and if I find someone out there with the same wander gene , maybe I'll be alone no more.
I hadn't really thought about it that much till now , but guess that's how it will be.

 

[Iggy]

I've tried 5 vanmates in the last two years. They have all been messy and expected me to pay the vast majority of the expenses, while their money went for their entertainment and/or addictions. None lasted more than two weeks. And I turned down several more that wanted to go with me. I know there's probably the right one for me somewhere but I'm not actively looking. 95% of the time, I don't miss female companionship. Life is sooo much simpler and I don't need to compromise on every decision. I'm far from a woman-hater, I'm just realistic that most women I know are looking for a provider and want to be spoiled. I can't afford to do that on a $500 monthly budget and am not willing to, for what I get in return. But hey, I still dream about finding the right one sometimes.

 

[66788]

If most men would closely and objectively examine their own lives, they would find that in virtually all instances of major upheavals in life, there was a woman at the root cause of the problem.

I've lived alone for 9 years and they have been the happiest of my life.   I enjoy the company of women at times, but don't want one living with me.

My freedom is the most important thing in the world to me and having a woman around drains my free time, money, emotional well being and essentially my freedom.

I'm sure that there are women on this board who feel about men exactly as I do about women, and I can totally understand and respect that.

I also understand that there are people who can't live without a relationship.   That I can't understand, but respect.

 

[cyndi]

Being single is so much easier. I hope to never have to consider another person's feelings, wants and needs 24/7/365.

And I agree with SternWake, except it's a man that would drain my resources, the tangible and intangible. I take full responsibility for that. I'm horrible at setting boundaries.

 

[Patrick46]

I'm glad to see a woman responding to this question.


I was almost gonna retitle this thread to the: "He-Man Woman Hater's Thread"!

 

[Almost There]

Post # 3 is purely a woman's point of view. I just refrained from listing all the things I don't miss from having a man in my life so that I didn't come off as hating men. I don't even dislike men, I just don't want to have to live with one!

 

[MikeRuth]

Probably good to add my view point, I'm not out on the road now, but I am a single widower. I've been asked out and declined. For the foreseeable future I'm quite happy and selfish being single. simply put, me my self and I and I only have to be responsible to myself.

Now with that said, I certainly would enjoy a woman's companionship yet I'm not looking for it. Maybe if it smacks me in the face, will see how that goes for a bit. And yes there would be ground rules from the get go. I know my self and some of those rules are for me!

It's funny this thread came up as I have been taking a little closer look at today's society, both young and older folks. I'm glad in a way that my youth evolved in the 70's as I really don't care for what I see in today's youth and how they go about things. Also learning there are women that are just as picky shall we say, they don't want commitment but companionship.
I get that and like that, but it still takes rules and or understanding as to where each of your are and what you expect or don't.
My problem is I'm a bit old fashion, and breaking old fashion habits is not easy.

SternWake, you never know and it could happen right here in as you put it Kalifornia

 

[akrvbob]

Let's be very, very careful this does not become a thread where we bash the opposite sex.

There are women out there who will tell you I was the worst thing that every happened to them, and I wouldn't argue with them. It's likely that's true of all of us if we were honest. 

Some people just shouldn't be together, but that doesn't mean you get to bash them here.

You only get to bash the other if you were perfect!!! Which means of course:

No bashing anyone!​

Bob

 

[mockturtle]

I've been married most of my life but am widowed and happily single now with no intention of ever being otherwise. This is the only time in my life I've ever been truly free. Not that I didn't love my husband very much. I did. But I also love the life I'm enjoying now.

 

[GotSmart]

I have a singles ad out there.  

I got a response about a month ago from a woman calling me a "Self righteous A~Hole.  She did not like some of my criteria.     I just filed it in my 419 folder.

I got a response to another ad the other day from the same person.  I sent her a reply that I do not want drama and anger, and she had too much of it for me.  It contained the rant I was sent.  She tried to deny it    :dodgy:  The criteria she objected to in the first place was the complete honesty, no anger and no drama line. 

After raising 3 daughters,  (Basically on my own) and after 4 divorces I am done with drama.  I would love to find someone I can get along with, and wants to be with me.  But I am not going to go through that again.  

If sparks happen, ~~~  

Meanwhile I treat everyone with equal respect and humor.  

If any lady dweller out there wants to have a nice drama free date I am a good cook, and have a sense of humor.    Especially about myself.  :angel:

 

[One Awesome Inch]

It took me 15 years to realize there is nothing I could do to make my now exwife happy or meet her standards. Then it took me another couple years to extricate myself from the relationship. I am very happy to have my two wonderful children out of the experience but even after all that time I have zero feelings for my ex. She is what you call 'high maintenance'. I cannot say I'll never be in another relationship, but I really do prefer to live by myself.

 

[Patrick46]

whatsa 419 folder??

 

[highdesertranger]

I was wondering that too Patrick. highdesertranger

 

[Lostinspace]

Trash can I believe.

 

[BigT]

Spam folder, I think.  It's also police code for "Dead Human Body", but I doubt that's the connection he was trying to make.

 

[WriterMs]

No category of people (in this case male and female) are all bad or all good, so it all comes down to our specific life experiences. And those who have major complaints about ex's must also remember they had a part in creating the relationship to begin with. So.....

It seems to me that our mobile, independent lifestyles are actually a terrific situation for the type of "relationship" many of us may want, especially those who are more..ummm...mature.

When both parties have their own home always at hand, it is easy to be together yet have "space." It is easy for one to leave for a month to follow an interest and then meet up again where and when it suits both parties. (Bob and Judy come to mind as an excellent example.)

Personally, I hope to find romance and love again at some point...and perhaps even commitment. But not with a man who wants a couple-joined-at-the-hip relationship or most any "traditional" relationship.