Introverts/Extroverts

[LivGolden]

A great TED Talk on the Puzzle of Personality...

https://www.ted.com/talks/brian_little_who_are_you_really_the_puzzle_of_personality/transcript

:idea:

 

[MrNoodly]

There's aslo a TED Talk by Susan Cain on the importance of introverts.

https://www.ted.com/talks/susan_cain_the_power_of_introverts?language=en

 

[travelaround]

Great videos, thanks for the links!

One of the reasons I want to live in a van is to be able to be alone if I want to be, without interfering with anyone else's expectations for me. My best friend at church is a social butterfly. She has a gift for befriending people. She befriended me back when I was a new Christian in 2013 - just showed up at my door with a Christmas movie to watch!

Anyhow, she, and a few others keep asking me why I don't attend more meetings, classes, Bible studies, and other special events. I tried, but I get to a point where I just need to be alone. If I do too much, it isn't good for me, and it seriously interferes with anything else I might like to get done in life.

This second video says what I've been feeling. "Stop the madness for constant group work." I couldn't agree more. It doesn't work for me. There's nothing quite so comforting as a day spent at home alone. Not everyone understands that.

 

[RoamerRV428]

way too long to watch and I got thru like a few minutes and gave up. Yes I am that type that can't give any of my time to watching stuff like this....hey this is me only now. I tried tho and I have to give myself credit for even clicking the link so I can't comment on the talk and contents.

Introvert definitely with small amt of extrovert only when I want it and for short blasts at a time. I don't want social contact anymore the older I get. I love the keyboard. My time and option to chat. I am such a loner and love it that way.

 

[ckelly78z]

I'm definately a loner, and would rather spend a day at home splitting wood, riding my dirtbike, or even reading a book rather than mall shopping.

I, too have tried the church thing, but was expected to join more groups, attend more seminars, and generally to be a cog in the wheel....much prefer small groups in someone's home.

 

[jacqueg]

Best definition of an introvert I've ever heard - you need alone time to recharge your batteries - as opposed to extroverts, who are energized by being in a place filled with people.

Note that neither definition mentions anything about whether you are shy or whether you like or mistrust people.

I actually think everyone needs at least some down time, I think the difference is how much. I need hours every day or I get seriously distressed.

 

[Plant]

Introversion is a major part of my personality. A recent Kisa test indicated that I'm ISTJ, with 96% introverted - 4% extraverted. I completely get the thing about crowds draining energy. They can in a serious way for me. In my life there definitely needs to be plenty of alone time. That is my productive time.

One problem I've found is that being such a strong introvert makes it easy to pass away time alone which can lead to isolation if I don't watch myself. I'm hoping that traveling and camping will add a bit more balance in that respect.

 

[USExplorer]

Given the explosive growth of van dwelling get-togethers, caravans, and other events, it would appear that a fair share of us are looking to escape the unnatural confines of continually solitary vehicle living.

Humans are not and never will be a solitary species. Extended periods of solitude usually cause an atrophy of social skills, which may result in pronounced discomfort in social settings and a reluctance to engage socially. Such individuals, to assuage their perceived inadequacies, often convince themselves that they actually prefer to be alone, a feedback loop that is rather difficult to break out of.

On the other hand, being uninterested in harmful or meaningless socialization merely demonstrates a healthy selectiveness in choosing friendships.

 

[MrNoodly]

..extroverts, who are energized by being in a place filled with people.

Extroverts are the vampires of social interaction. They suck energy instead of blood. 

 

[ckelly78z]

I've been married for 30 years, with 2 kids, had the same job for 20 years, and have really never had the opportunity to be alone for extended periods of time, but would like to try at some point. I think I would love living in a small class C RV, and being able to pick and choose my social settings with people that interested me, not co-workers that I am stuck with.

 

[RoamerRV428]

yes ckelly, the right to choose your own path thru life and not be forced into any given path thru work or social obligations, financials etc. so hear ya on that!

 

[squire]

I define myself as a "social hermit". Love to interact but need my alone time.

 

[Dan 1]

You might be an "Empath"?

 

[maki2]

Putting labels on yourself of course means "you just ain't right" or else it just means you read way too much physco babble on the internet which of course also means you just ain't right when you believet all the psycho babble they wrote.

The reality is if you are posting in this forum and most especially if you are a posting freak you darned sure are not an introvert in any way shape or form. There might be some extroverts in here but for sure there are no real introverts as real intoverts don't do social media interactions with other people. That is way too much contact with humans for them.

The chances are that almost everyone posting here is an "ambivert" which is actually an official designation that most people fit into. Lots of ambiverts in the world. It just means that you have some characteristics of introverts and some characteristics of extroverts too. But who wants to be perfectly normal and average? Then you can't label yourself as an introvert and use it as an excuse to tell people to quit bugging the heck out of you.

 

[ckelly78z]

Where other people will try to make eye contact with me, and start a conversation, I will avoid the encounter, and keep walking. I am very self sufficient, and don't like random contact with nosy people who have many questions/suggestions. I started eating lunch at my desk, because every person that walked in the door of the cafeteria at work made some comment that required an answer.

I have a few friends that are like minded, but don't seek out new contacts, and never call/text anyone.

 

[Dan 1]

The reality is if you are posting in this forum and most especially if you are a posting freak you darned sure are not an introvert in any way shape or form. 

The chances are that almost everyone posting here is an "ambivert" ...

"Ambivert". Thanks "maki2" I needed a word to represent the degree graduated forms of "gray area" between the polarities of "Extrovert" and "Introvert".

 

[maki2]

Where other people will try to make eye contact with me, and start a conversation, I will avoid the encounter, and keep walking. I am very self sufficient, and don't like random contact with nosy people who have many questions/suggestions. I started eating lunch at my desk, because every person that walked in the door of the cafeteria at work made some comment that required an answer.

I have a few friends that are like minded, but don't seek out new contacts, and never call/text anyone.

Many peope are shy and avoid eye contact. Being shy is not the same thing as being an introvert. I have never been a person to make a lot of eye contact. I don't reach out to lots of people to make new freinds. I don't like talking on the phone all that much. I don't want to have conversations with nosy people. But I am not an introvert I am an ambivert and ambiverts do have characteristics of both ends of the extreme.

I fully understand why I don't have as many friends as when I was younger. I don't have as much energy, I do have more pain and physical limitations so a lot of times I prefer to sit around and read books or watch TV. I don't have the income that it takes to go out to the movies, dinner, restaurants and such.  I moved several times and the friends and neighbors who were busy with family don't have a hole left in their lives when I moved. Other friends might want to visit but like myself it would be expensive and take physical energy so entropy rules the day.

The nomadic life will be much the same. I have had several times where I met someone and they wanted guidence and help with their fiberglass travel trailers but they are not nomadic so their daily lives are very much occupied with family. One of them has school children, the other is a full time caregiver for their spouse. Circumstances can be very frustrating when it comes to developing friendships because you lives are not "in sync" and that makes getting together much more difficult. But that is not being introverted. But you do get out of practice with socializing and you get complacent and you can become quite content with being alone.

Do not mistake being content with being alone with being an introvert, it is not the same thing.

 

[owl]

I have to ask, what difference does it make ? I would prefer you not try to classify me, I will only disappoint you, depending on the day !

 

[B and C]

It is all shades of grey anyway and can vary from day to day. It's a label and who cares.

 

[RoamerRV428]

yup, a darn label. I hate labels and when one has to put someone in a label and call it 'fact or perfect lable' then we got a problem Houston labels suck....do what ya want, more introverted, sure, less, cool...whatever floats your boat on how ya want to navigate out there thru your life
A label is for other's to define you, figure you out......let them have it but don't put yourself into any label, too restricting