Family and friends: "You are insane, possibly demented."

[JennyJ]

Yes, apparently I'm not mentally stable because after turning 68, I recently agreed to sell to a snowbird couple my nice mobile home after 5 years in a nice FL retirement park fairly close to the ocean... in lieu of a "totally crazy and unrealistic plan at your age" to tour the States camping in my Prius, before I get too old to want to do more than sit and watch TV all day.

Who knows, maybe they're right and I am sliding into dementia. OTOH, I've been adventurous all my life, backbacked alone across Europe, Greece, Israel and Egypt in my early 20s AND crisscrossed the States in my car numerous times in my early 40s, so naturally I'm thinking, "What's the problem? At least now I have GPS and a cellphone!"  


Not to mention I certainly ain't gettin' any younger, so if not now, then when... in my next life? "Hmmm, I'd better hurry up!" is what I'm thinking, lol. 


Even so, despite six weeks of extensive research, planning and preparation, I do sometimes quietly wonder if they might not be right, heh.  Fortunately, I have another 6-8 weeks to prepare before the house is no longer mine.


Anyway, all that to say, Hi, I'm new to the forum! 

 

[Malamute]

I say go for it.

If you know of some well written blogs by squared away people doing what youre planning you can share with the naysayers, and/or perhaps start one of your own for family and friends, if not general public use, they may start coming around some.


...And welcome!

 

[highdesertranger]

Welcome Jenny to the CRVL forums! To help you learn the ins and outs of these forums, this "Tips, Tricks and Rules" post lists some helpful information to get you started.

Most of our rules boil down to two simple over-riding principles: 1) What you post should provide good information (like your introductory post), and 2) Any response to someone else's post should make them feel glad they are part of this forum community.

We look forward to hearing more from you.

highdesertranger

 

[cyndi]

There are plenty of us older women out there and enjoying a mobile lifestyle. It's less dangerous than an urban life and more exciting (the definition of the word exciting changes with age, in my opinion)

 

[WanderingRose]

Good for you!

We’re not getting any younger.

 

[LERCA]

Hi Jenny
I think it’s a fantastic idea. I’m stealth in one place but my dream is to drive across country. I keep reading about people selling everything. Is that necessary? Where I live is where I grew up and it went from young families to people in aging in place. I know about ten people between 85 and 93. And I have many friends in their 70’s. So I don’t know if it’s only here that people are long lived but if you live another 20 years which here is probably likely, where will you stay? The elderly people I know are not able to get around well and none of them could live in a vehicle. I worry when people say they are getting rid of homes or low cost apartments. I will have more money come retirement and I have some ideas but I know I will need a permanent place to stay.
Can someone rent your place?
I think you’ll love traveling and meeting new people but I’d think about selling your home.

 

[eDJ_]

Error

 

[eDJ_]

Remember Harlan Saunders ?

He started KFC at the age of 70.  He drove around the countryside often sleeping in his car first trying to learn who had the best fried chicken product.   Then after developing a recipe he felt beat all of the rest he once again began to travel around the country selling the idea that if the restaurant owner would adopt his methods & technology and give him a percentage of each sale that he would put them in business.  The deal was done with a handshake in those times.  And Saunders didn't have a Van with a Bed or kitchenette to travel in. 

It was a matter of will power, focus, and believing in himself.    Let the others sit at home, watch TV,  grab the morning newspaper to look at the obituaries, and live out their last years in silent desperation.  (wondering who's next)  We're all going to die sometime, so why not LIVE until that time comes.

I'd suggest getting all of their emails together in a list that you can email.  Then putting together a blog or Facebook page to post photos and post about the sites & experiences you've seen or had.  

Brightest Blessings and all the best.

 

[jacqueg]

Yes, apparently I'm not mentally stable because after turning 68, I recently agreed to sell to a snowbird couple my nice mobile home after 5 years in a nice FL retirement park fairly close to the ocean... in lieu of a "totally crazy and unrealistic plan at your age" to tour the States camping in my Prius, before I get too old to want to do more than sit and watch TV all day.

If you don't try it now, when will be a better time?

See if you can find a way to address your family concerns about "what will you do if you decide you hate it? what will you do if you are diagnosed with parkinson's?" They're not wrong that these are good questions to ask/resolve. But they are wrong if they think that you belong in a rocking chair in front of the boob tube just because of the number of candles on your birthday cake.

Figure out what you will do in case it doesn't work out. Then just take to the road, if that's what you really want.

 

[Oldwolf]

If I had a retirement home that I liked, like you do, I would hold on to it for a while. Try out van living for a year or two then sell if you really love the new lifestyle. Surely you could find someone who would rent your nice place. There's no rush to sell, my advice is to ease into a major decision such as that.

Sent from my SM-G960U using Tapatalk

 

[LERCA]

Old wolf, thank you for your opinion. I agree. my mother was diagnosed at 80 with Parkinson’s. She was still working (by choice) At 85 she’s in bad shape. She can barely walk with a walker. She can no longer drive and that’s due to macular degeneration which began years ago. She’s almost deaf. People don’t think about these things. I agree with renting out a place or traveling part of the year. Some of us may have no choice but if you have a choice you should think long and hard. I read weekly on here about people leaving cheap housing and selling homes to live in a vehicle in middle or old age and I think of my mother and other seniors I know and I worry.

 

[vanbrat]

I don't plan on selling my house yet, we have been here 30 years now. But we are thinking about when we can't maintain this place. We are working on a reverse mortgage to pay for stuff. Sense we fell into an area where property has REALLY boomed in the last 10 yrs we know if/when we sell we will be able to afford something smaller just about anywhere we want. I love my house and don't plan to sell just yet, but I know I can always buy something somewhere else. We have decided to check out the country for a few more years and then see where we land when to old to do anything but watch TV and grumble at each other. (After 45 yrs together we can do that pretty good.)

My Mom and Stepdad are in a scary spot now that they are full timers. ya in their 80's. They have their little RV and so far only travel around the area here. It is scary because now he has some medical stuff going on, she has some medical stuff going on.

Maybe you can look around a bit and see what kind or type of housing for after the road landing spots you can find.

 

[GypsyJan]

"Maybe you can look around a bit and see what kind or type of housing for after the road landing spots you can find."

This is what I plan to do as I snow-bird each winter. I will check out towns in other states to find what will suit me best when I settle down eventually. I am looking forward to selling the current house. I have been here over 20 years and am ready for smaller and simpler after I get the wanderlust out of my system.

 

[NctryBen]

My family has been shaking their heads for years. I’ll up and go into Canadian back country with dog and canoe for weeks. Then the body started throwing harder punches... surgeries, cancer, more surgeries... So now my thing is to finish rebuilding a truck camper and join the nomads in Arizona come winter. As soon as I’m far enough along I’ll move into the camper and tweak everything. I’m most impressed with the simplest van, car and whatever builds. So Jenny... I vote you do it. Put the money from the house away and go with what you’ll need. If you don’t like it? Buy a house again! Sounds like your adventuress... every older person I know does everything they can as long as they can. You, and only you can now when to slowdown and... not sure what slowing down entails...

 

[JennyJ]

Thanks for all the comments! 


The reason I'm selling the house is that I took care of my bedbound 92 yo mother for a year before she finally died at home January 2, 2017, a mentally and physically taxing ordeal, plus dealing with the aftermath, so there are a number of unhappy memories here. Anyway, I can't rent out the house because this retirement park forbids it.

But even before that, I owned a small organic dairy farm in Michigan for 20 years and ran it alone...feeding and milking and birthing three cows and 15 goats, feeding and butchering of chickens and ducks and turkeys, stacking literal tons of hay and grain, mowing and barn cleaning and snow-shoveling that drifted over in hours, planting and growing and picking and selling organic veggies from thirteen 4x12 foot raised beds, as well as the myriad other things I choose to forget, LOL.


After all that farming and care-taking, I don't want to take care of ANYTHING anymore, not even a pet. In fact, I'm happy to sell this nice little place because I'll no longer have to worry whether the next hurricane will rip off the roof or Florida room and/or carport.


But there is one thing I viscerally ~know~ with 100% certainty... I will never, ever, EVER, die like my mother did. I have zero interest in being dependent on others until I finally die.


Anyway, my plan for the last month has been to study the things I need to know, and prepare as well as I can in the next 6-8 weeks, then call the buyers to get down here and sign papers so I can hit the road!

 

[RVTravel]

In that situation, the family could try to get control of your finances. One might consider securing bank accounts and maybe even legal advice.

 

[maki2]

The feedback you get from people is often in how you present things to them. What you need is a "script" of responses.

If you present your plan by saying I plan on joining the hundreds of thousands of retirees who sell the house and hit the road to enjoy the years they have left, and love not being burdened by all the chores that come with a house then your plans will sound much more acceptable them.

If you get still blow back can always say....I am tired of being stuck behind a fence and walls. There is much more to life than that for this free ranging spirit who still thinks young. The best years of life are still ahead of me and I have places I want to go, things I want to see, new people I would like to meet and a lot of new things to learn about. I can't do that sitting in a room watching mindless TV shows.

 

[RoamerRV428]

go for it and don't listen to naysayers. live your own life as you see fit. I mean if we listened to others.....omg...right? Never worry about it, plan/research/you been there done that and you know so go have some fun!

 

[notsosure]

The people that need to comment and judge usually have never lived on their own. They live through others, and
they live really well that way. Tearing down another makes them feel safer. Don't change the system that is working so well for them now.

It takes more energy to develop yourself.

 

[JennyJ]

Your responses are really striking home! I think most of my naysayers are quietly envious of my freedom/ability to try strange, even risky, ideas, but they also know they would never allow themselves to be THAT free, even if they were free, so they see fears where I don't.

It's been a struggle I'm used to, but the older I get the more they object, which confuses me as our parents are dead, I have no children, spouse or SO.  Just two older brothers who live on opposite sides of the continent, and their kids who live in the middle.

I guess the only way past their worries is to stop listening to them and actually get out and show them!