Are you embarrased to tell ladies you live in a van or camper?

Van Living Forum

Help Support Van Living Forum:

This site may earn a commission from merchant affiliate links, including eBay, Amazon, and others.
I'm gonna be honest here, I think I would be a little reluctant to mention it.&nbsp; <br /><br />Having said that, I have told just about everyone i know (some of them highly judgmental people) despite my apprehension. &nbsp; Its getting a little easier to discuss it with people, and helps a lot when someone is enthusiastic or even takes it like its normal.&nbsp; One of those makes up for 10 people who make snide remarks or smile while making mildly insulting questions/suggestions.
 
When the time comes and I'm "on the road" I don't think I'll volunteer how I live my life but I'll be "selective" as to who I tell &amp; why I'm telling about my nomadic lifestyle. If&nbsp;they're people who I think should know I'll tell them I live in an "RV." That's as far as I'll initially tell them anyway.<br /><br />I've gotten to the point in&nbsp;my life where I almost don't care what people think about the way I live my life. The only person's opinion I value is my own! I have to be able to look at the guy in the mirror &amp; tell&nbsp;him that I'm living my life by my own rules. If I can't do that, I'm not being true to myself.<br /><br />Most of my friends who I've told&nbsp;about my&nbsp;decision to "hit the road" has been met with some degree of acceptance. The only person who hasn't "embraced" my decision to hit the road so far is my almost 80 year old Mom. She's VERY old fashioned about the way she thinks we all should live our lives. But at almost 80 I seriously doubt I'll change her mind. Again, I've got to do what my heart tells me to do. She's still in the "sticks'n'bricks" mentality.<br /><br />Again, when it comes right down it the only opinion I'm worried about is my own.
 
Am I naive when I think that those who don't appreciate this lifestyle are the ones who dont know how to live? Has this society become so materialistic that individualism is not to be condoned? I have always thought outside the box and have never regretted it. I was lucky though as my parents were rich in wealth as well as spirit. They never looked down on anyone that had a lower income base or where they lived. And they also didnt look up to those that had more money then them In fact, I remember them always seeing the nature of character to be the determination for their friends.

I have always considered someone rich or poor by the way they treat others.
 
In the early stages, i would just say you live in an RV, by CHOICE.
 
Use the adventure side of the story to tell how you live. "Anywhere I find something is interesting" is one way to ignite a conversation about the life style.
 
Don't let others judge you and be yourself. Life is too short to be otherwise.&nbsp;
 
Bucking the system and not remaining in a situation that you don't want because you don't live controlled by fear like so many of the masses is not something to be embarrassed about. Walk proud and you will be just fine.
 
<span id="post_message_1275594096">Am I naive when I think that those who don't appreciate this lifestyle are the ones who dont know how to live?</span>
<br /><br />Each much choose the lifestyle that suits them best; what works for you is not what another would wish.&nbsp; To be critical of them for choosing how to live&nbsp;is no better than them being critical of you. Each makes their own choices and lives with the consquences. Be happy you've found what works for you.
 
Howard, I think I would work on how you break the ice in telling somebody about where you live...for me I say "anywhere I want" .. I could see me laughing after I say it, and I would say it with pride!...then seeing the puzzled look on their faces I would explain further. I know that if you present a feeling of&nbsp;embarrassment&nbsp;you will get the same feelings back in return, this life isn't for everybody, but for me it has become the best thing I have ever done... make it seem glorious, fun and adventurous.... you can polish the details later....<br /><br />Most of my regular clients know I live in the van behind the store.... most understand, once they realize I have all that I need and by doing so I can help my family and myself&nbsp;financially.&nbsp;
 
BK2valve.... love those bus pictures! Especially the wood stove! Love that!<br /><br />On to the topic at hand.<br />I recently went on a date with a girl who did not seem to mind me living in my van. In fact, I picked her up in it!<br /><br />In my experience it does help if they understand it is by choice and not necessity.<br />It's like those guys camping out in the wilderness... you know at the end of that trip, they go home to their houses and regular lives.<br /><br />But a weekend camper is no different from a camper who does it on a regular basis.&nbsp;<br />It's just a societal judgement in most cases.&nbsp;<br />The idea of the "intentional homeless" is a concept regular folks haven't figured out yet.<br /><br />So if it makes it easier, it helps to have them know you can really get an apartment anytime you want... you just don't want to. <img src="/images/boards/smilies/smile.gif" /><br /><br />BTW, to any who may be curious... I am 40 and available. <img src="/images/boards/smilies/smile.gif" border="0" align="absmiddle"> <br /><br />I got pics on my blog and you can also see my writings there to give you an idea of what kind of a person I am.&nbsp;
 
I think my biggest problem continues to be those well-meaning folk & kin who think I need "help" so they shower me with suggestions and alternatives. They've failed to realize a basic truth: FREE CHOICE.

Years ago a lovely young lady asked me why I was single, to which I replied: "Because I choose to be." You could hear a pin drop in that place. Even then I relished and required my privacy and "alone" time. I spent seven years living in an empty house back then (divorce) after my first wife emptied it. I never felt any need to fill it back up, either. This is in stark contrast to my dad, for instance, who is obsessed with cramming furnishings into every available space without regard to having room to actually use that space. When I sold that house I spent a good portion of a year living out of my tent and an '84 Chevette.

That year drove my family to almost insane extremes with their mis-placed unneeded "help" and suggestions. It was a good time for me, and I never really recovered from the loss of that, even to this day. And so the dreaming and planning continues....

I gotta' agree with other previous posters....be up front and honest. If they bail, they've saved you a boatload of future grief and anguish. You never know what a day will bring forth, and while that can be frightening at times, it's also exciting. Live the dream and don't look back. Sometimes I think my last wife's depression was the result of giving that all up for so many years. I think you're going to be pleasantly surprised how many interesting females will want to share your time and space with you.
 
I really love this topic. I have been married more than once. Sadly, after much time alone healing my heart and my Spirit, I realize I spent my first 40 years buying into the lie of Conformity. Someone mentioned their mother at 80. I, too, have a mother from that era when consumerism was born in the US, and appearances are everything.

Honestly, after my last divorce, I felt like I got my dream back. I'm a free spirit- a Work in Progress. And I hope I am never finished.

Howard, there are plenty of us single women out there who would be thrilled to find an adventurous spirit like our own. Do NOT compromise. Be proud of who you are and the choices you have made. That alone will put a sparkle in your eye that will capture the RIGHT woman's attention!

Also, think about the kind of person you would like to meet, and what kinds of things you would do together. Then go do them now. Because that is where you will find her. Looking for an adventurous type at a library won't work. Unless she is reading about mountain climbing! You know what I mean.

Hope this helps!
 
Those who mind, don't matter.<br>Those who don't mind, matter.<br><br>
 
Lamplighter, that is a great phrase! <img src="/images/boards/smilies/smile.gif" border="0" align="absmiddle"><br><br>I recently had a conversation with a friend that went like this:<br>I noticed my friend carried his stuff in a small plastic shopping bag. Just small things like medicine and lip balm.<br><br>He wondered if the ladies would mind him doing that.<br>I told him the one who doesn't judge you based on you carrying things in a re-used shopping bag is the one you want. <img src="/images/boards/smilies/smile.gif" border="0" align="absmiddle">
 

Latest posts

Top