Wokem,
I am in a similar spot - also in upstate NY BTW! I am 51, with a wife, 46, recent college grad daughter, 21, and current college student son, 19. I am looking to retire - tomorrow would not be too soon. But I also am very much tied to my family. My wife is agreeable to selling the house and buying a Class A, but not for many more years, and I also want to make sure the kids have the start in life they deserve.
So what to do? Make the interim time as pleasant as possible. My wife finally agreed to buying a custom cargo trailer and building it out as a weekender/vacationer. Enough room for the two of us and the dog, with the possibility of bringing the kids, albeit a tight squeeze. We're driving down to GA next week to pick it up and do a bit of boondocking on the trip back up. Then will come the build of the inside.
Hopefully a win-win for everyone. I get a taste of my dream now rather than having to wait, and I get to keep my family.
Send me a PM, maybe we can share some boondocking time in NY this summer!