Optimistic Paranoid
Well-known member
- Joined
- Jan 12, 2013
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Since this is the time of year we all have to shop for gifts for our loved ones, I thought this translator might be useful to some of you.
“Free gift” Translation: “You’ve already paid for it”
“Complementary” Translation: “You’ve already paid for it”
“Up to 40% off” Translation: “On trash we can’t give away”
“Your results may vary” Translation: “This stuff doesn’t work”
“Results shown not typical” Translation: “This stuff doesn’t work”
“New and improved” Translation: “We’ve changed the wrapper”
“Minimal impact” Translation: “Life destroying”
“Not responsible for damage” Translation: “Of course we’re responsible,but we’re confident you’re stupid enough to believe this”
“A diamond is forever” Translation: “Divorced six months later”
“Subject to change without notice” Translation: “It’s all BS”
“Your call is important to us” Translation: “But not important enough for us to answer the phone”
“You could be a winner” Translation: “But more likely you’re an idiot”
“Guaranteed for life” Translation: “Submit a death certificate with your claim”
“User assumes all risks” Translation: “This will not end well”
“All natural” Translation: “Maybe at one time”
“Free gift” Translation: “You’ve already paid for it”
“Complementary” Translation: “You’ve already paid for it”
“Up to 40% off” Translation: “On trash we can’t give away”
“Your results may vary” Translation: “This stuff doesn’t work”
“Results shown not typical” Translation: “This stuff doesn’t work”
“New and improved” Translation: “We’ve changed the wrapper”
“Minimal impact” Translation: “Life destroying”
“Not responsible for damage” Translation: “Of course we’re responsible,but we’re confident you’re stupid enough to believe this”
“A diamond is forever” Translation: “Divorced six months later”
“Subject to change without notice” Translation: “It’s all BS”
“Your call is important to us” Translation: “But not important enough for us to answer the phone”
“You could be a winner” Translation: “But more likely you’re an idiot”
“Guaranteed for life” Translation: “Submit a death certificate with your claim”
“User assumes all risks” Translation: “This will not end well”
“All natural” Translation: “Maybe at one time”