Hi! We thought we'd introduce ourselves.

[songbird62870]

Hi.&nbsp; I have been researching this lifestyle for the past week and thought I should talk to some real people who are living this way.<br /><br />My fiance and I live in Colorado.&nbsp; We moved here from NY 3 years ago looking for a better life and for a while things were great.&nbsp; My mother is in ill health and retired in October 2011 to move in with us.&nbsp; My father (they are divorced) just moved out here in April of 2012.&nbsp; My ex-husband is here with our kids.&nbsp; We all live in the same apartment community.<br /><br />Last week I was notified that they are not renewing our lease.&nbsp; We had some issues with the downstairs neighbor threatening us and accosting my mother in the hallway while they were drunk.&nbsp; I was told that I complain too much.&nbsp; Really?&nbsp; When a drunk man tries to put his hands on&nbsp;my 65 year old ill mother!&nbsp; Anyway, we have to move by August 31.<br /><br />I am a cancer survivor and have very bad credit because of all the medical bills.&nbsp; My fiance just came off a bad divorce where his ex-wife took out loans in his name to the tune of 1/2 million dollars (she forged his signature).&nbsp; Needless to say, he had to file bankruptcy.&nbsp; All this adds up to the fact that we cannot get another apartment.<br /><br />I can get my mother into an apartment she can afford on her pension and social security, so I am not worried about that.&nbsp; My fiance has a full-time job driving a school bus, but he doesn't make alot of money and if we are homeless, he will lose his job.&nbsp; Winters are cold here in CO, so if we don't have a roof, we don't expect to really survive the winter.<br /><br />I have been looking at used RV's and thinking that maybe that would be the way to go.&nbsp; I might be able to get my dad to take out the loan for us and I know that we would be able to make the payments and have enough money to survive.&nbsp; We are down to our last resort, times are bad.&nbsp; <br /><br />I have been looking for job for the last 4 years.&nbsp; Once I got over the cancer and was ready to go back to work, the economy tanked.&nbsp; I actually had one recruiter tell me that my family would be better off with my life insurance because I was unhirable.&nbsp; Yes, I walked out of his office and decided that I really didn't want any job he might send me to.&nbsp; What an idiot.&nbsp; I am a qualifed comptroller who can't get a job because I have been out of the field for 7 years.<br /><br />I have been reading various websites related to how to go about this lifestyle.&nbsp; I figure since we would be fairly stationary while my fiance works, I don't really need to worry too much about buying used with regards to engine wear and maintenance.&nbsp; There would definately be some, but not as much as if we were traveling full-time.&nbsp; I am hoping that I can get some sort of virtual job that would allow me to work from the RV.&nbsp; We are keeping our car to travel around town in.&nbsp; I need to stay fairly local to where I am so that I can take care of my parents and my kids (they live with my ex because I can't support them, but he is still one of my best friends, so it's all good).<br /><br />Does anyone have any tips for us?&nbsp; Are we going about this the right way?&nbsp; We are hoping to do this for a couple of years so that we can pay off my medical bills, re-establish our credit, and save some money.<br /><br />Any help would be appreciated.&nbsp; Thank you.

 

[dragonflyinthesky]

No words of wisdom from me but i'm glad you are here. <br /><strong><span style="color: #ff00ff;">Dragonfly</span><img src="../images/boards/smilies/wave.gif" alt="" align="absMiddle" border="0" /></strong>

 

[Stillwater]

Welcome and God Bless. During a job transfer, I lived in a 30 year old, $2,500 Winnebago for a year. It remained stationary in a campground but with all utilities included at $300/month, it worked out well. I will caution you that the Indiana winters (except for 2012) are typically pretty harsh and probably similar to CO: several 8-12" snowfalls per year, consecutive weeks that may not increase over&nbsp; 10F-15F... keeping incoming water thawed with heat tape was a snap. Gray water and blackwater becomes unserviceable in an older rv at -10F to 15F temps. The outflow and tanks just freeze. If you can keep the underskirting covered in haybales, you may have a chance but most places you park won't allow this practice since it may draw mice. Likewise, some will and some won't allow you to block airflow under the rv/camper with some kind of surplus siding.<br /><br />If the unit has a forced air heat, then all is comfortable. If you must use radiant heaters, then the interior temps will vary by as much as 30F from your feet to your head. (Head= hot. Feet = frozen.)<br /><br />I would never offer unasked advice but since you asked, based on your comments of the situation, I would do everything I could to avoid going into debt for a purchase. Find the least expensive abode you can land in a spot (van/trailer/rv) and build finances there for an improvement.<br /><br />Nevertheless, best of luck and welcome.<br /><br /><br />EDIT TO ADD: Your husband drives a bus?? I'll bet he knows places to buy surplus buses pretty cheap. The structures of a bus are shockingly sound and would make a great base to build out a home... especially if you're not going for economy of travel but a base to work out of locally.

 

[songbird62870]

<p>Thank you so much for your tips.&nbsp; Our options are pretty limited right now.&nbsp; We were expecting to re-sign our lease and we live paycheck to paycheck.&nbsp; We literally have no money.&nbsp; Going through my dad may be our only option not to be homeless.<br /><br />We did look at busses, unfortunately, retrofitting so that we would last the winter would be financially impossible.&nbsp; We are also facing the time factor of having only 40 days to make the transition.<br /><br />I figure that if we stay at an RV park we would at least have bathrooms and showers available.&nbsp; I used to camp with my dad when I was a kid, so that's okay with me.&nbsp; There is an RV park close by that rents year round, it's about $550 a month in high season and $450 a month in off season.&nbsp; The payments on the loan would be made to my dad and they would be no more than $300 a month.&nbsp; That's half what we pay in rent right now.&nbsp; Our other brick-and-stick expenses would be cut - utilities and such.&nbsp; <br /><br />I have been seeing used RV's that range from $9k and up.&nbsp; I am leary of getting something that is too old.&nbsp; Just like a house or car, something too old takes more maintenance and money.&nbsp; I am thinking that maybe we should look for something slightly newer.&nbsp; While I am very handy, the fiance definately is not...lol.&nbsp; Luckily the ex-husband is in the auto industry and is willing to help me get parts and stuff at wholesale and pitch in with the work, if time allows.<br /><br />We&nbsp;would still be able to have my 7 year old daughter on the weekends (she loves to camp) and keep our 2 cats.&nbsp; My 20 year old daughter is usually busy with work and friends (weren't we all...lol) so I don't have to worry about room for her.<br /><br />You know, my grandfather when he was still alive used to lay a blanket over the engine of his '66 chevy belaire during the winter when I was a kid.&nbsp; He used to say that it helped keep the engine from freezing during the NY winters.&nbsp; I never knew if there was any truth to that, but I eventually owned that car until it died in 1998.&nbsp; Wonder if finding a way to insualte the tanks might help.&nbsp; Hmm...something to think about (once i actually find the tanks...lol).<br /><br />Thanks for your advice, we will definately pay attention.</p>

 

[rvwandering]

&nbsp; If you don't plan on moving at all a trailer might be a lot cheaper. You should be able to hire somebody to move it to the park or make an agreement with the seller to set it up in the park. Good luck - let us know how it goes.

 

[Les H]

Welcome, songbird, glad you found us. There are lots of us that could be in your situation with the loss of a job or major medical problem. Hope we can help with some of your questions, and there are some of us everywhere, mabye someone could help you witha quick buildout? I'm in Alabama, so too far away exceptfor build ideas and moral support.
Les

 

[songbird62870]

Thanks everyone for the warm welcome.<br /><br />I looked at the trailer option.&nbsp; All the trailer parks that are close to my fiance's job are actually in tornado zones (which makes absolutely no sense) or in really not so nice neighborhoods.&nbsp; You have to buy the trailer, pay rent on the land, and HOA fees so it wouldn't really save us money.<br /><br />Also with the wildfires we had this year, I think I really like the idea of being able to unhook and drive away in a hurry.&nbsp; If we stay out of the RV park in the summer when the rates are highest and my fiance has no work, we could probably live cheaper.<br /><br />A 5th wheel is not an option, since we drive a Kia Rio it would mean having to buy a vehicle to tow it as well.&nbsp; That means more of a financial outlay and higher insurance costs.<br /><br />

 

[Guest]

Welcome and good luck with your dilemma. <br /><br />Bri<br /><br />

 

[WanderingRain]

If you plan to be stationary for a while and if you got a piece of land. you can try a small wheeled house?<br /><a href="http://www.tumbleweedhouses.com/">http://www.tumbleweedhouses.com/</a>?<br /><br />I agree with the other responders about debt. I would advise against it if at all possible. It will only get you into further trouble.<br /><br />The more debt free you can make yourselves, the better off you are. If I were you, I'd want my money to go to my family's immediate use first. If I had extra then yeah, the creditors can have some. The way it is structured these days, everyone else gets their money and whatever is left is left to you. &nbsp;I say reverse it... pay yourself first and then give whatever is left to collectors.&nbsp;<br /><br />The truth is, most of our credit scores will never be good ENOUGH for them. They will always want to move the goal posts on you. It is a meaningless number and as 2008 proves, even the banks don't respect the rules--lending to anyone with a bad rating or zero credit. And now they pretend like they're back to their usual standards? It's all baloney. I never bought into it. I just buy all my stuff cash and it's worked out for the best. I've never owned a credit card in my entire life and never will. I just refuse to play their wicked little game. Thus, my life is free from worrying about my credit rating... scores and all that crap. Buying stuff so you get points, rewards, etc... you're just spending more money to get those piddly rewards. They make you feel like you got a bargain but in fact, you've already purchased all those "free" perks they give you whenever your reach those milestones they set... bah... it's all baloney.<br /><br />Those things just have a way of seeping into your mind until you feel like you cannot live without credit. The truth is, billions of people around the world live without this stupid system and they do fine.<br /><br />Well, good luck with your decision. Welcome aboard and pardon me for my rantings. <img src="/images/boards/smilies/smile.gif" border="0" align="absmiddle"><br /><br />

 

[cargovanconversion]

Welcome to the forum,<br /><br />Van.

 

[songbird62870]

Hello again,<br /><br />Well the RV idea fell through.&nbsp; My dad offered to buy it and was going to gift me 10k that I wouldn't have to pay back.&nbsp; <br /><br />We went to see it, my ex-husband went over it with a fine tooth comb, said it was a really good deal and if he had the money he would buy it himself.&nbsp; My dad put down a deposit, we would pick it up this Saturday.&nbsp; That was on Monday.&nbsp; On Tuesday morning, my dad calls - he's not sure, we are moving too fast (given that we are going to be homeless on Aug 31, I am not sure moving slow is an option), he won't have enough money for himself (I would think 500K in the bank would be a good cushion, but hey, what do I know).&nbsp; So, I let him off the hook - I got his deposit back, no RV.<br /><br />I figured that would be the end of it, but now he's calling every day - whining about how he feels bad (really, you will have heat this winter and YOU feel bad, whatever), moaning about how we can't live in the car and what are we going to do, talking about how he 'really want's to help, but...'.<br /><br />Okay Dad, message received - you don't really want to help, you just want to salve your concience because you know that an asthmatic who is prone to pneumonia won't survive a colorado winter.&nbsp; That's okay, you do what you need to do and so will I.&nbsp; Oh, and don't expect me for the holidays.&nbsp; If we are still alive, I won't have the time or the patience for your self righteous applogies.&nbsp; You don't have to help, I am not your repsonsibility, I am an adult, I can and will take care of myself.<br /><br />Ok, so I sound angry, I know it.&nbsp; On many levels I am - how can someone offer help with one hand, get your hopes up, and then let it all come crashing down around you.&nbsp; It would have been better to never offer in the first place.&nbsp; The emotional roller coaster of first planning to live in the car, then planning to live in a van, then planning to live in an RV, and then back to the car is exhausting.&nbsp; Oh, and there wont be any 10k gift because it was only for the RV.&nbsp; Whatever...moving on now.&nbsp; <br /><br />So, new plan (or old one).&nbsp; We will be living in a 2002 Kia Rio hatchback.&nbsp; Myself, my fiance and 2 cats.&nbsp; Space is an issue.&nbsp; My mother has been living with us rent free for 9 months - not paying a single bill even though she has the money.&nbsp; <br /><br />Yesterday she told me that she needs to keep all of her money to get an apartment.&nbsp; She has 6k in the bank, we have nothing because we have been supporting her.&nbsp; I don't begrudge her the money, I am not a gold-digger, but when we have been spending every penny we earn on keeping a roof over our heads and you won't even let me buy boxes well let's just say that didn't go over too well.&nbsp; All of the boxes that I had from when we moved were used for her stuff when she left NY, they are all full in her storage unit with her stuff.&nbsp; Ok, so don't replace them, garbage bags are cheap, I'll use those until we are actually living in the car and we have the money to buy our own.<br /><br />So, I have decided that I cannot afford to have negativity in my life.&nbsp; I will be walking away from both my parents and never looking back.&nbsp; I am sorry that they think that handling their healthcare decisions, money decisions, sales of homes, legal matters, shopping, house cleaning, financially supporting them, and doing everything else for them was not enough.&nbsp; It was enough for me.&nbsp; So now they are trying to make me feel guilty, for crashing and burning because I am not superwoman, for walking away (or as my mother said yestersay - being in a snit).<br /><br />I was raised to take care of family, it's important.&nbsp; But here I am-exhausted, broke, and homeless and I am being villified for it.&nbsp; I have to ask, how much is enough?&nbsp; When am I allowed to take care of myself?&nbsp; I am a cancer survivor who didn't have time to be sick, because my parents needed me.&nbsp; I was very lucky, it was caught early, but there is alot of follow up care.&nbsp; Care I have neglected because I didn't have the time or the money that was going to my parents.&nbsp; I haven't had a check-up in 7 years and I suspect that it has returned.&nbsp; My fiance doesn't know this and I wont tell him.&nbsp; Why worry him with something he can do nothing about, there is no money for medical care.<br /><br />Part of me says that I am now the one who is whining.&nbsp; Part of me says that I will finally have freedom from burdens that have been dumped on me that are too heavy to carry.&nbsp; But I am supposed to be strong enough to do it and I am mad that I can't.&nbsp; So, for self-preservation, I have taken the attitude of 'the hell with everyone else'.&nbsp; The only people that I can afford to care about are my kids, my fiance, and my ex-husband who has still been there and been a good friend.&nbsp; Maybe that's wrong, maybe not, but it's how I feel right now.<br /><br />So back to the car, it's really small.&nbsp; I have decided that since the back seat is split and folds down in sections - we will fold down half of it so that my fiance can sleep laying down in the back (he has a job and I can sleep during the day while he is working).&nbsp; There will be a box for the kitties (the shelter wont take them back and I wont put them to sleep for something they have no control over), and a litter box in the back.&nbsp; I can put a small cooler on the back seat that is still up, a small bag of food and 1 duffle bag with clothes and toiletries on the floor.&nbsp; I will stay sitting up front during the night.&nbsp; <br /><br />My ex is doing everything he can to help, he has offered showers and laundry any time we need it, but I have to be careful.&nbsp; He lives in the same community we are leaving and I don't want them to throw him out too.&nbsp; He has the kids and they have to be safe and taken care of.&nbsp; He tells me not to worry about it, he will take care of it but I don't trust our 'managment' company.&nbsp; With good reason.<br /><br />So, thanks for reading my rant.&nbsp; I would talk to my fiance about this but he is so worried and scared about my health that I don't have the heart to burden him with more.&nbsp; Sometimes it's easier to tell strangers you will never see.&nbsp; Thanks.

 

[judycmomx6]

Hello songbird. Welcome. I was just wondering, don't they have homeless shelters in co.? You would think that with the weather they have there that they would have lots of them for people in the winter. Or maybe a hostel or other group type dwellings for people with low incomes? I would take myself to the welfare dept. and ask some questions, they may know where to send you as I'm sure they deal with this everyday, wouldn't hurt to ask. I wish only the best for you.

 

[dragonflyinthesky]

I'm sorry Songbird. Its okay to rant for a while. I have done it myself here on occasion. When people here say they care, they really mean it.<br /><strong><span style="color: #00ffff;">Dragonfly</span></strong>

 

[songbird62870]

Judycmomx6,<br /><br />We can't go to a shelter.&nbsp; Denver just passed a law making homelessness illegal (as if that's going to fix the problem..lol).&nbsp; There aren't that many shelters.<br /><br />My fiance has a job driving a school bus.&nbsp; That is a government job so if they find out he is homeless he loses the job.<br /><br />We tried social services, he makes $5 too much a month.&nbsp; We can't get another apartment because he had to file bankruptcy and had a foreclosure due to a very bad divorce.&nbsp; We don't technically have a 'very low income'.&nbsp; We were just in the position of having to help my parents and that didn't leave much for an emergency.<br /><br />Welfare's attitude is 'you have a job, you have no problems, we can't help you, and you are taking up our time for someone who actually needs our help'.<br /><br />Dragonflyinthesky,<br /><br />Thank you for reading.&nbsp; I am still having a hard time with feeling guilty for 'ditching' my parents.&nbsp; I was raised to take care of them when they get old, and I wish I could do that.&nbsp; Lately, I feel like they are drowning me and I can't get my head above water.&nbsp; They are secure, we are not, and they still want more from me.&nbsp; Now they want me to make them feel better about me being homeless.&nbsp; I love my parents but I feel like the proverbial apron strings are strangling me.&nbsp; I ask myself, at what point is it ok to be selfish and take care of myself?&nbsp; <br /><br />They want me to sue the management company for putting us out - on what grounds?&nbsp; with what money?&nbsp; If I could even find a lawyer who would take a case, and didn't expect to get paid, I could wait years for it to get through our overburdened court system.&nbsp; Besides, it wouldn't help our situation now.&nbsp; It's a case guaranteed to lose since I can't prove I didn't do something, how do you prove a negative.&nbsp; Suing the management company seems like a big waste of time, resources, and energy for nothing.&nbsp; That's not the kind of person I am.<br /><br />My parents aren't terrible people, they are just selfish.&nbsp; They think it's my job to take care of them and everyone else and think that I have done this to myself.&nbsp; I suppose on some level they are right, I did do this to myself - I didn't pay enough attention to my own life and the risk I was running of losing it all.&nbsp; Yup, that's my responsibility and not a mistake I will make again.&nbsp; I just have to get it into my head that I wasn't put on this earth for them.&nbsp; I was put here to have a life, to be a productive member of society, to raise my children to be good people and to accomplish something.&nbsp; I'm working on that.<br /><br />Thanks again.

 

[Mortisha]

Hello and welcome HuggZ

 

[VanLifeCrisis]

Hello, I'm new here but welcome too <img src="/images/boards/smilies/smile.gif" alt="" align="absmiddle" border="0" />&nbsp; <br /><br />I think it is well past time for you to focus on yourselves for a while.&nbsp; Put all your energy and money into getting yourself straight before worrying about the family for a bit.&nbsp; Its kind of like the airplane thing, they tell you put your oxygen mask on first, so you are conscious to take care of others after.&nbsp; Get yourself on stable ground first and foremost.<br /><br />Is your rio a hatchback?&nbsp; Will the rear seat fold down?&nbsp; I know people who had to live out of their car temporarily, they put the rear seat down and slide a piece of plywood in there, tossed on some blankets and a sleeping bag.&nbsp;&nbsp; Crack the windows and fire up a mr heater propane heater on cold nights (window cracked for ventilation of course).<br /><br />Maybe you can find a used van?&nbsp; Now that you dont have those bills to handle (you getting a deposit back?), you might be able to get one fairly quickly.&nbsp; Even a minivan would be an improvement (i camp in a minivan comfortably 2 nights a week, sure it could be done for longer with a little kitting out). Almost all minivans have removable rear seats and are usually just over 5 feet wide and over 6 feet behind the driver seat to rear. I paid like 500 hundred for my beater, and the engine and body is crap but it works, especially if i dont travel. Maybe consider trading in the rio for a gently used minivan or other van?<br /><br />Sorry if this sounds like bad advice, just tossing stuff out there.

 

[WanderingRain]

It sounds like your Dad is feeling guilty about being an indian giver by all the calls he makes to you and saying how he feels bad... He actually wants to say he feels bad he had to be an indian giver.<br /><br />There are people who just care too much about the people around them that they do forget themselves. I am in the same boat, actually. I am supporting my parents and this means I cannot sock away enough cash for myself to actually buy a better vehicle "home". It is cutting into my plans, but what can I do?&nbsp;<br /><br />At least my folks are nice about it and don't have any bad habits.<br /><br /><br />Good luck with your search and hope you find some cheaper vehicles. (there are some at pplmotorhomes.com) I check the site often and there are class c's that are below 10 k sometimes...<br /><br /><br />

 

[songbird62870]

Actually, we will be looking to trade in the Kia Rio for something better, but we wont have the money until January or February.&nbsp; I will still have bills for the apartment that have to be paid.&nbsp; We will be getting some security back but not enough to buy something.<br /><br />When I told my dad that we were going to look at buying an RV I had not asked for his help or money.&nbsp; He offered and then followed that up with 'this is another one of your wet dreams that is going to cost me money'.<br /><br />Wow, Dad, sorry that parents income counts towards college.&nbsp; I didn't make the rules, just have to live by them.&nbsp; <br /><br />He's upset because he helped me pay for college.&nbsp; Unfortunately, my 20 year old daughter was only 2 years old at the time and very, very sick.&nbsp; She was constantly in and out of the hospital and I was unable to finish school.&nbsp; I am a mom first and a student second, that's just the way it goes.&nbsp; She's better now but I guess he still holds it against me.<br /><br />He's also a severe mysoginist - he absolutely hates women.&nbsp; It was fine when I was a little girl, but when I got older he started making terrible comments to me in front of my children.&nbsp; I had cut him off for a while, but went back when he got cancer at the same time I did.&nbsp; When my oldest daughter hit 16 he started doing the same thing to her.&nbsp; My little one is 7 and he thinks she's perfect.&nbsp; Eventually she will grow up and find out that he's not the great man he portrays himself as.&nbsp; My ex monitors her exposure to him very carefully and my dad has been warned that if he pulls the same garbage again, he will have no access to the kids.&nbsp; I'm good with that.

 

[sl1966]

Hi, Welcome, and sorry to hear about the negative stuff. I'm sure you'll get where you're meant to be and this will all be a distant memory!<br /><br />

 

[Captain Logos]

Don't <em>ever</em> feel guilty for acting upon your rational self-interests.&nbsp;<br /><br />It's your <em>right</em> to be happy. Anyone trying to deprive you of that, physically or emotionally is not worth caring about.&nbsp;<br /><br />I hope for the best in your outcomes.