It's taken me some work to not be too fatalistic about self-protection and my safety.
Don't have a dog, can't care for a dog, wouldn't have room for a dog. Car has no alarm system. Pepper spray would be lethal to me or nearly so due to a medical issue. Gun is off the table for now.
I do have a
stun gun, though. They're like a Taser except require direct contact, and do not fire pins or insert into flesh/clothing.
For all their shortcomings as defensive weapons, stun guns appear remarkably well suited to attacks occurring inside a small car, where there's no advantage of distance to begin with anyway. I, er, tested it on a friend of mine.
EXTREMELY strong deterrent. Not messy, no potential harm to passersby, very minimal legal or medical concern.
A concerned friend got me the cheap one I linked to, and honestly I'm not convinced there are any high quality ones out there on the market. If I was looking at the ideal stun gun to defend myself with I'd want:
- Wrist strap with disabling pin to prevent use against me
- Clear charging indicators
- Stun mode independent of flashlight on/off
- (Ideal but optional) prongs concealed; appears as a regular flashlight
The one I've got has none of these.
Some others I've seen have one but not the other features. I'd advise that it's really important to have the disabling pin to help prevent use against you if snatched away in a struggle. The concealed ones would be nice to use as regular flashlights and then can be weaponized if a problem arises, but only if the battery isn't too dead from flashlight use, and if you have to turn the flashlight off to stun then that can be problematic. The one I have, the flashlight has to be turned on for at least a split second before going into stun mode, which blows a cover if you're simply preparing to ward off an attack (e.g. person breaking in).
I've also got an Ila Dusk personal safety alarm. At the pull of a pin it lets out a shrill, ear-piercing recording of a woman screaming her head off. I've accidentally set it off a couple times, the battery only lasts 3 years without use and is non-rechargeable and non-replaceable. I can see this being most helpful for attacks in semi-public. Worn clipped to a belt loop, an attack from behind focused on silencing me would, I expect, be easily foiled/confused by yanking the pin to let rip some loud screaming. I wear headgear that interferes with being heard when talking, let alone screaming, so knowing this could be my "voice" if needed helps a little. Due to the nature of the battery though I can't say I really trust it as a reliable deterrent.
Similarly, my stun gun has no indication of what charge it's at, the packaging warns against damage from overcharging but if you fail to charge it sufficiently then you're outta luck in the moment of truth.
My dismal personal security simply means that when stealth parking I'll have to critique my concealment as if my life depended on it, because in a way, it just might. Making friends everywhere I go also helps, especially both the protective types and the types who know the "lay of the land" so to speak and can help me navigate the local surroundings in a manner that avoids and deescalates trouble. Being a disabled young woman means a lot of people instinctively feel protective of me, and much as my independent spirit wants to be all stubborn and "I can look out for myself", the practical side of me says I need to allow the natural flow of things to work in my favor when possible. No sense in making life harder than it needs to be.
Another factor that works in my favor is my car is TINY, and anyone larger than me is going to have a lot of difficulty getting in at all. I'm like a tiny little mouse hiding out in its burrow.
Opening the passenger side door is greeted with a large dorm fridge and other such things, driver's side is the chair pushed forward and a large storage bin behind it. Without familiarity of the layout, anyone confronted with such a setup will have to take at least several seconds to adjust and re-figure a plan, which gives me time to react.
I still feel helpless and vulnerable. Parking in driveways of people I know for now helps a lot, but some locations like vacant lots with sketchy neighbors, not so much. The more I can do to prepare, though, the more confident I feel. Next on the list is to recruit someone to try the doors and attempt to lock pick while I'm inside, so I can mentally bookmark those sounds and see what else I might learn. Every bit of awareness improves my chances and confidence.
