Why does the world want to keep me trapped here

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Every Road Leads Home

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Joined
Mar 13, 2016
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Location
Plymouth, Ma
Starting to feel like the world wants me to stay trapped in Massachusetts forever!  Tried moving to the West Coast 9 years ago and I was about a month away from making  it happen and my Dad got a terminal diagnosis from Cancer about 2 years away from his retirement.  No way I was leaving him when he had so little time left.   A year later he passed away, another year to settle his estate. 
      Decided I'd move West again, sold all my stuff, closed my business accounts, packed up my Jeep and went to Portland Oregon.  Took 3 months getting out there, hiked Yosemite with some of my friends from Colorado along the way, found a place to rent in Portland, life was good!  Week before I was to move into my new apartment I got the call my grandmother fell, broke her hip, needed help or nursing home.  She's been a second mom to me my entire life, no way I'd let her move into a nursing home.  Drove back East, moved in with her, she passes away a year later, another year to settle the estate.
     I say ok, time to move West.  Before I could head out, I get sick.  Couldn't leave my support network of friends and family with the condition I was in, needed help with every aspect of life........cooking, food shopping, laundry, etc etc.  Was on crutches two of the four years and prob should have been in a wheel chair for a good portion.  Still not 100% but def getting a lot better, good enough to do some decent road trips with the proper planning.  Timing works out perfect as my family and I made  the decision to sell the family summer home.  April 1st we were set to put it on the market, my cousin who is part owner, decides she wants to buy it.................perfect an even faster sale.  NOPE......I should have known better. Long story short, she's created a legal  nightmare that we have to take her to court over.  Have some court dates coming up I'll have to stick around for and lawyer said expect a few more dates to follow depending on the outcome
     
     Maybe after this I'll finally be free??

*End Rant
 
Hang in there Matt. There will be light at the end of this tunnel. Keep positive & keep the hope. Question/suggestion.. Are you able or willing to give your lawyer your proxy/power of attorney, I believe that's what its called to be your voice for this challenging mess? if so How about doing that so, you can get back on the road and live your life like you want....   :)
 
Hi,
      That's actually a really good suggestion but the process is tying up my travel funds unfortunately.  Between the costs of carrying the house and lawyers fees I'd be stretching myself a bit thinner than i'd be comfortable with.  But, I know there will be a light at the end of the tunnel and once it's finally sold, I'll be getting a little bit from the house and that's absolutely going towards a nice lonnnnnnnng roadtrip!
 
Maybe trick the universe and say you're only going slightly West? Or going sort of Southwest? :)

Good luck on getting the house sold and not giving too much money to Lawyers.
 
Rugster said:
Maybe trick the universe and say you're only going slightly West? Or going sort of Southwest? :)

Good luck on getting the house sold and not giving too much money to Lawyers.


Tell 'em you're only going down to the corner market for a loaf of bread and a gallon of milk!! :p


Give 'em heck brother!! Sounds like you've got a surplus of good karma on your side!
 
Tell em you're going to the store for something and just keep going, the store was in (name your prefered destination)
 
Mock Turtle ,,,too funny ! But a good point.
" All Roads Lead Away From Here "
 
mockturtle said:
Maybe you should change your screen name! ;)

Ha, that was a good one.  The original plan was that every road would lead to wherever I'd be calling home that night.  Guess changing it to Every Road Leads BACK Home would be more fitting!  

Had a talk with the Lawyer this morning, he is trying to get this to stay out of court and moved forward, keeping my fingers crossed she will be intelligent enough to know everyone loses when courts get involved.  But if she doesn't want to be reasonable (Her definition of reasonable is paying half the market value for the property) then to court it goes, at least we have a court date scheduled.
 
A wise person once told me that emotions are caused by thoughts, not the other way around. So maybe look at it that you were fortunate to have other people to care for and were able to, and even luckier to have people care for you.
I know about selfish people who want to take advantage of someone's death. I have a Brother. Looking at the bright side, I am not like him.
I am happy to hear your health is improving. Maybe you can start to take local trips. It is surprising how we tend to overlook the places that we live near to.
If I say to myself, "if I just had this or that, then I would be happy". What that often means is I refuse to be happy until I get what I want. So I try to make up my mind that I can be happy until I do get what I want.
Anyway I hope your disappointment with your life's situation is short lived.
With best wishes.
 
Every Road Leads Home said:
my family and I made  the decision to sell the family summer home.  April 1st we were set to put it on the market, my cousin who is part owner, decides she wants to buy it.................perfect an even faster sale.  NOPE......I should have known better. Long story short, she's created a legal  nightmare that we have to take her to court over.  Have some court dates coming up I'll have to stick around for and lawyer said expect a few more dates to follow depending on the outcome.

Has anyone explained to her, in a way she can understand, that if the sale is forced by the court (partition sale) the only winners will be the attorneys? It would probably NOT be sold at fair market value, and SHE would probably not be permitted to buy it at the (severely) reduced price it could sell at. Not only lawyers fees need paid, but court costs and sale costs come from the proceeds. She will absolutely lose, as will you all.
That situation can't be fun. Take care, best wishes.
 
Here's a little help and humor to get you thru (From the Far Side)... I have referred to this many times over the years: :)


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DannyB1954 said:
A wise person once told me that emotions are caused by thoughts, not the other way around. So maybe look at it that you were fortunate to have other people to care for and were able to, and even luckier to have people care for you.  
I know about selfish people who want to take advantage of someone's death. I have a Brother.  Looking at the bright side, I am not like him.
I am happy to hear your health is improving. Maybe you can start to take local trips. It is surprising how we tend to overlook the places that we live near to.
If I say to myself, "if I just had this or that, then I would be happy". What that often means is I refuse to be happy until I get what I want. So I try to make up my mind that I can be happy until I do get what I want.
Anyway I hope your disappointment with your life's situation is short lived.
With best wishes.

Hi Danny,
   Appreciate the reply, it's nice to be reminded of these thing from time to time.  I guess that rant may have made me seem like I look at the entire situation as negative and that's not actually the case.  I'm actually quite happy and positive 99% of the time.  I think this world has blessed me more than my fair share, even being sick for a few years and I still feel like i'm way ahead in the game. Heck, I even stop and laugh at myself sometimes when I think about the situation out loud. No matter how this turns out, I'm walking away with a decent chunk of money in the end. So it's hard to feel bad for yourself when I know a little time and aggravation is going to end in a nice little reward. If I could go back and change any of the things that happened......being there for my dad, my grandmother, getting sick myself, I honestly wouldn't. Hell I wish they were both alive and would live another 15 years and I'd be more than happy sitting here with them for all of them.  I do agree that people (myself included) overlook the places that they live.  I've traveled all over New England for 30 years and love it to death, but at the point where it's time to head West! But I know it's coming, even if it took another year, heck two it's not gonna ruin me by any stretch and i'll be enjoying plenty of closer destinations in the process.   But IF I could change one thing in this world...... I would change my cousin being an idiot!  The things she comes up with and does leaves me shaking my head and asking "WHY, WHY WHYYYYY does a grown adult behave this way?, how is it possible!?!?"
 
DannyB1954 said:
If I say to myself, "if I just had this or that, then I would be happy". What that often means is I refuse to be happy until I get what I want. So I try to make up my mind that I can be happy until I do get what I want.
There was a pop song a few years back
One of the lyrics was
It's not having what you want, it's wanting what you've got
I always thought that was a good mindset
 
I've always kind of felt like George Bailey a lot over the years. ;)  (It's A Wonderful Life)
That stairway finial is one of my fondest moments in the whole movie.  Haven't we all just wanted to ?? Grrrrr.. THROW something!!? and then... ;)
It's all about perspectives.
 
I think part of being a full time nomad is developing a bit of a "f#ck you, f#ck your problems, f#ck your disappointments, f#ck your expectations, f#ck any losses, I need to do this for myself or I'll end up suicidal" attitude.

You took care of others. Others took care of you. Now consider the balance sheet even and get on with looking after your best interests.
 
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