SternWake
Well-known member
- Joined
- Nov 30, 2013
- Messages
- 3,874
- Reaction score
- 2
Not sick of my home, just sick of where I've been parking my home.
And I am not sick of my parking spot, or my neighbors whom I consider friends, but I am sick of the multitudes who live in this corner of the USa, and the attitudes of these multitudes who are so overwhelmed with their own self importance, and need to portray this in each and every interaction with those around them..
Perhaps I am being a hypocrite. Perhaps not.
In February of 2001 I returned to this country, after travelling overseas for 3 years.
My first experience on my return, was LAX. When the plane was circling Los Angeles preparing for landing, signalling the end of an epc journey, I was looking down at the sprawling masses, part of me was wishing the plane would just crash, and 13.5 years later now, I am again wishing it did.
Thankfully, then, a longtime friend drove 2 hours to retrieve me from this hell which is Los Angeles. The next morning, I decided to walk someplace to get breakfast, meet some locals, acclimatize to my new surroundings, as I did in a dozen other countries, but everybody avoided eye contact. Could not be bothered, or were perhaps fearful of anybody seeking even the merest acknowledgement we were sharing the same piece of sidewalk for even a second.
It's 13 + years later now, I've owned this van since a few months after returning, and I'm 2 hours from LAX again, but it is the same thing, and I'm so sick of it.
I know not everybody is just a self important douchebag, but it certainly seems like that is the goal of 99% of the people. Some have achieved it, the others wish they could, and the rest seem to be trying their damndest to be the biggest ass hat they possibly can in their quest for important douchebag status.
Nothing is keeping me here but fear of escaping my comfort zone.
But there is no comfort, other than a legal, level parking spot. It sickens me that this, and lack of funds, has kept me so immobile as of late.
I should be on the road this time tomorrow. Driving at night, as there is nothing I want to see that I already have not seen, in this SW corner bordering the Pacific, and traffic enrages me. It's just a four lane highway filled with suburbia for 150 miles, and all of the humans seem obsessed with more more more, and who has more, and how they can get more, and none of them seem to be able to pull their smart phones from their faces, or their shitty attitudes from their personas.
I hope to reestablish some contact with some good people I lost contact with years ago. My fault, not theirs. Guilt.
After that, I hope to find a spot somewhere further north, where I am the only human for miles around, and just absorb that feeling. I'm so alone anyway figuratively, I might as well be physically too.
It's one thing to be alone in an unpopulated area, entirely different to be totally and overwhelming alone when surrounded by the masses of those to whom one cannot relate, and no longer cares to try.
I hope to find.......... I don't know. Perhaps just a little bit of friendliness, and all I know is that that, is in short supply around here.
The road calls.
FU Southern California. FU.
F effing U!
I'll be checking in if/ when I have 3g or 4gLTE connectivity, but I don't enjoy typing on my Phone and will not be participating much here, if at all, for a while. If/When I do, I'll be skipping spelling and proper grammar entirely, but I need to digitally detox too.
If you all see some members here with 12v DC issues or questions, where I'd normally chime in with my 2 cents, know that I'll be out of touch for a few weeks and will likely do no chiming.
Hopefully my van is as mechanically sound as I think it is, because I really need it to take me away from here. I need a soul reset, and that is not going to happen here, as all I feel is the hate which everybody here seems to relish in.
And I am not sick of my parking spot, or my neighbors whom I consider friends, but I am sick of the multitudes who live in this corner of the USa, and the attitudes of these multitudes who are so overwhelmed with their own self importance, and need to portray this in each and every interaction with those around them..
Perhaps I am being a hypocrite. Perhaps not.
In February of 2001 I returned to this country, after travelling overseas for 3 years.
My first experience on my return, was LAX. When the plane was circling Los Angeles preparing for landing, signalling the end of an epc journey, I was looking down at the sprawling masses, part of me was wishing the plane would just crash, and 13.5 years later now, I am again wishing it did.
Thankfully, then, a longtime friend drove 2 hours to retrieve me from this hell which is Los Angeles. The next morning, I decided to walk someplace to get breakfast, meet some locals, acclimatize to my new surroundings, as I did in a dozen other countries, but everybody avoided eye contact. Could not be bothered, or were perhaps fearful of anybody seeking even the merest acknowledgement we were sharing the same piece of sidewalk for even a second.
It's 13 + years later now, I've owned this van since a few months after returning, and I'm 2 hours from LAX again, but it is the same thing, and I'm so sick of it.
I know not everybody is just a self important douchebag, but it certainly seems like that is the goal of 99% of the people. Some have achieved it, the others wish they could, and the rest seem to be trying their damndest to be the biggest ass hat they possibly can in their quest for important douchebag status.
Nothing is keeping me here but fear of escaping my comfort zone.
But there is no comfort, other than a legal, level parking spot. It sickens me that this, and lack of funds, has kept me so immobile as of late.
I should be on the road this time tomorrow. Driving at night, as there is nothing I want to see that I already have not seen, in this SW corner bordering the Pacific, and traffic enrages me. It's just a four lane highway filled with suburbia for 150 miles, and all of the humans seem obsessed with more more more, and who has more, and how they can get more, and none of them seem to be able to pull their smart phones from their faces, or their shitty attitudes from their personas.
I hope to reestablish some contact with some good people I lost contact with years ago. My fault, not theirs. Guilt.
After that, I hope to find a spot somewhere further north, where I am the only human for miles around, and just absorb that feeling. I'm so alone anyway figuratively, I might as well be physically too.
It's one thing to be alone in an unpopulated area, entirely different to be totally and overwhelming alone when surrounded by the masses of those to whom one cannot relate, and no longer cares to try.
I hope to find.......... I don't know. Perhaps just a little bit of friendliness, and all I know is that that, is in short supply around here.
The road calls.
FU Southern California. FU.
F effing U!
I'll be checking in if/ when I have 3g or 4gLTE connectivity, but I don't enjoy typing on my Phone and will not be participating much here, if at all, for a while. If/When I do, I'll be skipping spelling and proper grammar entirely, but I need to digitally detox too.
If you all see some members here with 12v DC issues or questions, where I'd normally chime in with my 2 cents, know that I'll be out of touch for a few weeks and will likely do no chiming.
Hopefully my van is as mechanically sound as I think it is, because I really need it to take me away from here. I need a soul reset, and that is not going to happen here, as all I feel is the hate which everybody here seems to relish in.
