Hard core outdoors people are tough. They’re hard. They sleep on the ground with no sleeping bag. They keep warm by coating their skin with grass clippings and animal blood. They have weather beaten leathery faces. They drink their own urine and eat the still-beating hearts of the animals they’ve killed with their own bare hands. They’ll kick your ass. They don’t take showers, but if they did, they’d be the coldest showers that nature would allow. Yes, their showers would be cold like the snowy landscapes that they wander with minimalist uninsulated footwear.<br /><br />We on the other hand, are soft. Our palms are doughy and smooth like babies’ freshly powdered behinds. <br />
