a thought (fear?) on being alone

[IanC]

I have always been a solitary person (lived alone most of my 59 years ), but have enough friends and contact with the customers in my business to satisfy the natural need for bonding with my own species.

I am fascinated by stories of people who live in isolation - I just watched a doc about a woman who has lived in isolation in Siberia for most of her 80 years .

Here's something I've been thinking about. Last year I woke up from sleeping outside in the hammock - there was a deer standing inches from my face, looking directly into my eyes. The experience was so stunning that I was almost paralyzed. But, after that brief moment I had to share it with someone. I wanted to stop strangers on the  street and tell them about it .So the question is ; how, when you are living a solitary life on the road, do you get to the point of experiencing amazing things and never having someone to share them with ? I suppose Facebook could fill that need - heck , people post pictures of their breakfast.

I once asked a therapist if it was normal that I spend so much time alone but don't get lonely. He said it was a definite personality type and not abnormal. As I am making definitive plans to push off from the shore, sometimes the doubt starts creeping in that I don't have what it takes - that the reality of being alone in vast, remote places will not match the need I have to do it. Living a Spartan life doesn't bother me at all - I suppose the doubts creep in when the options for human contact become fewer .

I'm wondering how you folks for who living remotely is their life have done it . Was there an adjustment period or did you just find yourself in a place you should have been all along ?

 

[nobodyG17]

Being on the road you can choose which you desire on that day.

Feel the need to socialize?  Move somewhere with people.  Feel the need to be alone?  Move somewhere quiet.

 

[SoulRaven]

"nobodyG17" is exactly on target. In the mobile lifestyle, there are all kinds of people and certainly you see everything from mobile hermit to mobile socialite and everything in-between. When traveling, full-time rv living, and camping, for me, it has been harder to stay under the radar of the others for time alone or just walking with my dog than find someone to converse with. While social, I get overwhelmed when it is non-stop.

 

[LeeRevell]

"I have always been a solitary person (lived alone most of my 59 years ), but have enough friends and contact with the customers in my business to satisfy the natural need for bonding with my own species."

Sounds like me.  Same age, though I am now retired....  no more pesky 'customers' to plague my day.
But a good question.  Not being fulltiming yet, I still have friends and family close enough to interact wit, though I do this sparingly.  I also am my elderly Mom's primary 'caregiver', and see her daily.  We talk, but of course, there is the generational gulf there.
I have always been something of a loner, the 'odd man out' in any larger group.  I am accustomed to that.  Early on, I'd use my motorcycle and later a car to 'get away from it all', taking off into the woods for privacy.  Now the van allows that. 
In time I can extend those 'alone times' to days or weeks.  Solitary by nature I don't expect any great problems.  But in this country, people are always just around the next corner.

 

[GotSmart]

There are times when the moment is 100% yours.  Hold it, treasure it...  remember it.  Share it later.  

This was Christmas day 2014.  I spent that day completely alone, and treasure the memory.  Doves eating walnuts in the road.

 

[mockturtle]

Would my travels be as enjoyable with someone else along? No. My daughters phone me every day, at least when I'm accessible, but most of our conversations are about them, not my adventures. I do thank God every day for His awesome creation and spend countless hours studying and enjoying creatures of all kinds. My late husband, whom I loved boundlessly, would be bored to tears with this lifestyle.

 

[Suanne]

I've been most alone when people are around, but no sense of connection. And, other times I've been alone without any other humans close by. In both cases, I've found journaling, writing out my thoughts and experiences, to be fulfilling. In a sense, I'm meeting that need for connection by externalizing it and sharing back with myself. But, even for this introvert, I've very much appreciated the friendships that I've found among like-minded "vandwellers." That has been an unexpected benefit of this lifestyle.

 

[masterplumber]

I find in my normal day to day life I don't get enough alone time. I like people, but in small doses. And I also seem to be odd man out in a crowd - don't know why as I try to fit in, but just don't seem to much of the time. I wondered myself if I had what it takes to be completely alone for a longer period of time. So a couple years ago purely by circumstance I went on my annual elk hunt by myself. I spent 8 days in the wilderness without talking to another human. At first it was odd, mostly because my good hunting buddy who is always there, wasn't. But after I got used to it I loved it - one of the best times of my life, literally.

 

[IanC]

Seems like I have plenty in common with people replying. I met a guy who hikes the Appalachian trail 4 months a year, rarely seeing a soul. He told me that he almost loses the ability to have conversation when he gets back to the world - takes him a few weeks and even then he finds it hard to be fully engrossed in what the other person is saying.
Walking with my dog in the woods this morning I had the thought that I talk to him more than any other person already and when I do it's usually about matters at hand.
Like a couple of other guys said , I have always felt the odd man out in a crowd as though I'm playing a role I'm not comfortable in. Maybe living a more isolated life won't take that much adjustment after all .

 

[Yogidog]

Great question, I could probably stay out here pretty much forever without getting bored, need dog here though or I would be lonely. Saw turkey and deer today, I feel less alone in nature. Feel connected to things in a real solid way. I use journaling too, so I can see if I am going way off track. Using that captains log now. Thanks for discussion. Oh yes and we can share what we want on here too