I've owned lots of Fords, but from a different generation. they were all 351W, 302, or the inline 4.9/300. I've never had a Ford with a Triton engine.
That said, I really like the newer Ford vans and, like you, have been looking for one, but the spark plug issue bothered me as well.
Here's what I've determined from doing a little research as well as talking to mechanics I know:
Spark plugs last a lot longer now than they used to. As a result, the recommended service cycle has increased. I think Ford recommends 70-80k or something like that. Apparently you can sometimes get away with not changing them out till well over 100k miles.
However, here's 2 things that can happen.
1. Since Tritons use aluminum heads, the mating of the disimilar metals (spark plugs aren't aluminum) can, over time, cause the plugs to seize in the head due to corrosion. That, plus the 2 piece plug design can lead to problems when you go to change plugs.
2. On these engines, the spark plug threads protrude into the combustion chamber. Carbon buildup on the threads can then make them very hard to get out. This can happen if the plugs have a lot of miles on them.
Please note that this addresses the possibility of broken plugs and stripped out threads in the heads when trying to replace plugs, NOT the issue of engines blowing plugs out of the head! As I understand it, the stuck/broken plug and stripped thread issue is much more common and what you are more likely to run into with a used van.
My approach is going to be to just not buy a van that's apt to have these issues unless the plugs have already been serviced. If someone has a van with 100k on it that still has the original plugs, I'll probably pass. So ask for service records and see if the plugs have ever been replaced.
My Ford mechanic buddy suggests servicing the plugs at 60k and says to be sure and use liberal amounts of anti-seize compound on the threads of the new plugs.
Also, I believe Champion makes a replacement plug that's one piece and eliminates some of the problems.
I've only heard of one vehicle in my personal circle of acquaintances that had this problem. A friend's son had an Excursion with a 5.4 Triton. He had to buy and install the re-thread kit after stripping the plug threads out of the head. He described it as "Not Fun!"
Good luck with your search!