Starting new life.

[tylergurl72]

The last time I posted I mentioned I was having problems with husband. My dream was to get a van and begins my new life. Recently we split up in a very bad separation that is now leading to an awful divorce. I still don't have a van but am practically living out of car sleeping on someone's couch. I'm not prepared mentally for this but I'm trying. My kids are moved out except one who's staying with a very good family friend until I can find a place. The thing is I cannot find a place in my price range or in decent area. I just wanted to vent. Kinda feels like end of world even though I know it's not. What do u do when u start at with feelings of anger and guilt. There's always tomorrow I know but right now it's just hard.

 

[spd2918]

You will get through it.&nbsp; Divorces are horrible because everything in your life changes, and it can be too much all at once.&nbsp; Take care of yourself physically and take one day at a time.&nbsp; Focus on all the good changes you will be experiences instead of the bad.&nbsp; Things will get better in time.<br><br>Been there, done that.<br><br>Do you know why divorces are so expensive?&nbsp; Because they are worth it.&nbsp; <img src="/images/boards/smilies/biggrin.gif" class="emoticon bbc_img">

 

[RJCooper]

Wish you the best.&nbsp; Been there, done that.&nbsp; The only words I will say to keep in your head are this.&nbsp; "Most people give up moments before they succeed." Never give up!

 

[marineprepper]

Recently divorced myself. Getting out of my house and into a travel trailer has been the best therapy I could wish for. I wish you the best of luck. Keep hitting up creigslist and auto trader for a van maybe...

 

[dragonflyinthesky]

Divorce sucks, even good splits. Done it myself. Vent away, lots of us here just to listen.

 

[James AKA Lynx]

You find the good about it and move on. I did it 2x and moved on finding good and making good in what I did. Sometimes a lot and sometimes very little good.<br><br>Set short term goals and long term goals. Start making them. <br><br>Take care, James AKA Lynx

 

[tylergurl72]

Thank you guys I really wasn't expecting anyone to read that. Y'all are sweet. It is difficult but ill make it. I'm looking for a van right now. I am taking baby steps. I know those steps are scary but way worth it.

 

[tylergurl72]

Update on my status, unfortunately y'all are my only friends. Besides the stalking and harassing messages I was given a ultimatum this morning, which I have decided to not answer. It's for the best. Got a lot of emotions going on and wish I could go back in time but that doesn't happen. So I'm going to learn to live again and to live for me. My kids have moved on, my youngest is in a safe and secure home which I see most everyday and talk to every day. I'm still on a couch, but it's ok. I'm looking for new job to get me into something soon but realistically it's going to be income tax time before I get out. This is not a position I wanted to be in and mentally am not ready either since I've hit a low. But I do know I have a friend who's helping me by sharing her house and food with me. Who tries to give me advice, and who listens to me. I tried so hard to make it work and it didn't so now I need to move on and possibly work on my dream. I know y'all don't know me and I probably sound like a whining child but I just wanted to say thanks for lite ing and putting up with me. I'm still researching during this and trying to remember who I am and what I wanted to do for so long. Now in time maybe within a year ill have something I can call my own and the ability to travel. So I hope y'all don't mind but just talk at me even if its just to say get over it girl lol. Thanks again for listening and putting up with me.

 

[marineprepper]

Its been almost 1.5yrs since my split. Took me almost a year to feel like "myself" again. everyone is different but I find that time by yourself is critical. Gives you a chance to look in the mirror a bit and gather yourself. Somtime I get lonely though and I have to go hang with a friend. Look back in time and see what made you happy, go do it again if you can. Walks after dark are like steroids for my brain....<BR>Keep on keepin on.<IMG class="emoticon bbc_img" src="https://vanlivingforum.com/images/boards/smilies/biggrin.gif">

 

[yesican]

Life's trials...not always fun to go through but when you come out on the other end, you realize it was something you needed to do.&nbsp; My divorce was in "94" and I'm still single.&nbsp; Keep your sanity by realizing you are a good person, a strong person, and you can get through this. Not sure if you're soon-to-be ex is a good guy or a bad guy, but in either case, he worked with what he had collected over the years.&nbsp; Some people don't or won't weed out the bad stuff and end up exhibiting&nbsp;bad behavior.&nbsp; Many times, mean behavior is encouraged by parents and the offspring know nothing else.&nbsp; You see it very often nowadays.&nbsp; Someone else's bad behavior has nothing to do with you, including your soon-to-be ex.&nbsp; It is his responsibility to become a mature individual.&nbsp; It is your responsibility to do the same for yourself.&nbsp; It is normal to hurt and cry.&nbsp; Don't beat yourself up for not moving quickly to get over this.&nbsp; Just remember...When life's situation is the bottom of the barrel, the only way to go is up!&nbsp;&nbsp;How long you spend at the bottom of the barrel depends on you.&nbsp;

 

[Blue]

I think divorce is a lot harder on the gals, my sister went through it a few years ago and is still hoping for some kind of closure and its never going to come through. I dont know if there is any great advice to give, other than dont sweat the small $h!t (ultimatums, mean texts, etc) and take some time and figure out who you really are as an individual.