irresponsible, unreliable? Really?

[cleanheart]

I was talking to my best friend yesterday. she called to say "Let me give you a little advice". Here it comes.<br>She said not to tell anyone that I wanted to live in my van because people would think me irresponsible and unreliable. What? Really?<br>I just want to get my teeth fixed and have some money to fall back on when I can't work. It is impossible to save any money living the way I live now. Does she understand that? I don't know.<br>The more I think about it the more pi$$ed off I get.<br>What business is it of anyone how I live my life?&nbsp;<br>I certainly won't be revealing it to anyone else that's for sure! The couple people I have told don't really understand it but accept it. I've only told 3 people. No more! I don't dare tell anyone in my family other than the one niece. My brother would have a stinking fit! Wow!<br>Aarrrrrrg!&nbsp;<br>This is just hurtful to me. Makes my heart heavy now. There goes my day! :-(

 

[Stargazer]

I have very little contact with other people. When I do, it is usually with someone who is fixing the van. I tell them I live and travel in it. (I have a home base so I'm a part-timer...more on that later.) Before long, more people have gathered around to hear what it's like and ask questions. I think the key words are "travel in it". Everybody who lives in or out of a vehicle is a traveler--to work, to the dentist, to the grocery store, to a different place to sleep every night, to the food bank.

Yesterday, I took my bicycle in for repair and change of tires, something I can use offroad. I was explaining to the man what I wanted, that I live and travel in my van to remote areas and how I want to use the bike. He became very animated and told me about a trip he had made one summer in a converted bus, how he hopes to be able to live that way some day. Soon, another guy was standing there, just listening, eyes bright and shining. Same thing happened when I had a battery replaced, when I had some body work done. One guy pulled out his phone and showed me a picture of an RV he was looking to buy. Is everybody planning to do this? The camping areas may be very crowded in a few years. Or there may be many vehicles with people sleeping in them parked outside vacant homes on residential streets!

I am sorry you had to endure the negative judgements of others. It's so hurtful. Bleh on that. Funny, though...the most hurtful negative judgements I have experienced have been from other mobile lifestylers. I had much higher expectations of open mindedness and found that people who live this way are just the same as those in sticks and bricks. Part-timers are "wannabes" and not worth jack squat. That's the first question one is asked, "Do you full time?" and if the answer is no, they slap that scarlet letter on you. Nothing you say after that is of any consequence because you're "just a part-timer". Nevermind that for months at a stretch, I must meet and overcome the same challenges. Actually more because sooner or later, the responsibilities of the home base call me back to do things I'd rather ignore. It's my choice.

Vandwellers are simply a chip off the general population. Good or better, it's just how we are.

Stand up proud and be the best vandweller person you can be! Those who don't get it...well, they just don't get it. Same as Vanners who badmouth those who choose the more "normal" way of living.

 

[Nemo]

I think, for some people, we are a threat to the status quo, and that makes them uncomfortable..<br><br>I spent most of my life living a mainstream existance, going through a daily grind that I loathed for the sake of the perception that it was 'the right way to live" &nbsp; How I wish I would have broken out of that mold decades ago! &nbsp;<br><br>Consider, they may be unhappy with the grind, but dont have either the courage or the drive to break free of it.. perhaps they see your doing so as diminishing thier sacrifice? (not that they should be sacrificing, or that you have any responsibility for it)<br><br>Mostly, I get nothing but support from those in my life that matter, and envy from those that are stuck in the machine <img src="/images/boards/smilies/smile.gif" border="0" align="absmiddle">

 

[Willy]

&nbsp;A lot of it has to do with perception. Instead of saying that you live in your van, claim to live in a 'Class B RV'. That's a totally different thing in the mind of many a person. Vandwellers are dirty longhair bums, whereas respectable people like hard working retirees live in RV's. ..Willy.

 

[cleanheart]

Thanks for the feedback. I guess I can see where they're coming from. Most probably think of the "hippy" vans and dirty long hairs. Silly! Silly then silly now!!!! I guess I'll just keep it to myself and do what I need to do for me. I've always been a "roamer" and it's in my blood I believe.&nbsp;<br>I think too that some are threatened by my thought process as they just either can't relate or want to and are afraid. I've been rolling this lifestyle over in my head and my heart for a bunch of years and have read everything I can on it and just finally got fed up with the struggle of "making ends meet" every single month! Some of us don't have that retirement package waiting and don't have that great job with the great pay and benefits. I am one of them! I'm tired of it and want to do something about it. I just guess I don't see where it's anyone elses business. I keep shaking my head and sighing! Need to just get over it I suppose.&nbsp;<br>Thanks again!

 

[Willy]

&nbsp;During my decades of rubbertramping, my lifestyle has been one of a person living considerably OVER the poverty line.. while my yearly income has been considerably UNDER the poverty line! Kinda sez something, eh? ..Willy.

 

[cleanheart]

Hi Willy,<br>Yes, I've done the math! LOL I know I would finally be financially sane once I move into the van! I am so ready! I still have so much to do yet tho. I had no idea how much crap I have accumulated over the years. It's going to take me a couple more months to get rid of everything and decide what to keep. I can't keep much as I don't really have anywhere to put it and I'm NOT going to pay out for a storage space.&nbsp;<br>I live under the poverty line now and once I get into the van I'll be aokay!

 

[Scoundrel]

I've experienced something similar.&nbsp; I remember being at a party and saying I wanted to live in the smallest place I could find.&nbsp; People (especially women) looked at me like I was from some alternate universe.&nbsp; They just couldn't fathom why anyone would live in a tiny, one room apartment by choice.<br><br>I'd also get it when I'd mention that I was a busker (street performer).&nbsp; People didn't understand I wasn't a homeless panhandler.&nbsp; "But, you're so talented!&nbsp; Why don't you play in bars?"&nbsp; Because I made more money playing on street corners!<br><br>I'm reminded of the film "Fight Club."<br><br><em>"We buy things we don't need, with money we don't have, to impress people we don't like."</em>

 

[lampliter]

Drive around the country, make and sell crafts, be happy.<br>or<br>Get up at 5AM every day and pray that you make it to the week-end-do the same thing every day-with the same people and hate every minute of it---and wonder why you're losing your mind.<br><br>It's a choice.

 

[cleanheart]

<span style="color: #0000ff;"><span id="post_message_1277267663" style="line-height: 20px;">I'm reminded of the film "Fight Club."&nbsp;<br><br><em>"We buy things we don't need, with money we don't have, to impress people we don't like."</em></span><span style="line-height: 20px;">&nbsp;<br><br></span></span><span style="line-height: 20px; color: #000000;">Very good! I feel this<br><br>Lampliter, I refuse to continue to play their game any longer. The constant stress I feel every month wondering where my gas money is going to come from so I can make it to work to pay my bills and keep a roof over my head and keep Thor's bowl full. It's ridiculous! I'm not real crafty. I wish I was. I tan deer hides but there's no money in that. Not for all the work it takes. I'm not a good seamstress so maybe I need to perfect that with some hides....a thought.&nbsp;<br>Thanks for the encouragement.</span>

 

[offroad]

you cant even say you want to think about it. &nbsp;everyone thinks you are crazy. then i through numbers at them like $200k house takes 30 years to pay off, and you still pay $500 monthly in taxes-maintanance-insurance. and then you are old with less energy to do the things you love.&nbsp;

 

[Seraphim]

It's funny, but that attitude of inclusion/exclusion seems to be a norm throughout society, no matter the lifestyle: once someone beces convinced their lifestyle is the 'correct' one, they become critical or un accepting of those who live the rejected lifestyle. Whether its stick and brickers looking down on van dwellers, or van dwellers seeing all stick and brickers as trapped unhappy people longing to be free. Lol. It seems people have to justify their lifestyle - to themselves at least - by stereotyping and criticizing those who live differently.

Don't worry about what others think. Live the life that makes you happy, and let others live theirs without criticism. Unhappy people criticise. Happy people don't care how you live - they're not worrying about their lifestyle so they're not worrying about yours. But the blade cuts both ways. I see many people here stereotyping working stick and brickers as unhappy tortured souls. Some are, some aren't.

Be confident enough in who you are so you have no need to criticize others, and so the criticism of others has no effect on you.

 

[cleanheart]

Thanks Lonfu for the dental information. I too am frugal to a fault.&nbsp;<br>Seraphim, I'm a pretty happy soul. I am for the most part very content with my life other than that I struggle. I love my family with all their quirks but they would not understand my thinking at all! I want to travel and love life not worry about what others think of me.&nbsp;<br>Thanks, I will be more confident. I'm almost there, It's going to be difficult at first I think but I also believe I will be much less stressed!<br>Thanks so much everyone for all your encouragement, it means the world to me as I get through this process.

 

[Willy]

&nbsp;Nice thinh is, there are soooo many rubbertramps out there that it's relatively easy to find some and gain 'acceptance'. Thing is, they're kinda invisible to ordinary folks, cuz people don't really want to 'see' them. ..Willy.

 

[cleanheart]

hahaha Willy! I like being invisible. It pleases me to be left alone! I hope I can actually "hit the road" soon. I will be living full time in the van soon but stationary to my town as I still have to work for a couple more years, I hope I'm invisible!

 

[cleanheart]

Wow! OpenMinds, great right on Post! You give me new confidence and courage. I absolutely love that last line! gonna use it as my signature to remind myself!<br>Thanks!!!!!

 

[mobilekev]

"<span id="post_message_1277250930">Instead of saying that you live in your van, claim to live in a 'Class B RV'"<br><br>I don't want to mislead people so I just tell them I live in a Class B-&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; <img rel="lightbox" src="/images/boards/smilies/smile.gif" class="bbc_img"><br></span>

 

[owl]

&nbsp;&nbsp; Seraphim, you hit the nail on the head, dead on. I have said the same thing on here before. Some people no matter what kind of life they are leading think it is okay to diminish others chosen lifestyle to elevate their own. Some here do it all the time.<BR>&nbsp;&nbsp; cleanheart, do what works for you and check my signature.

 

[lampliter]

Cleanheart;<br>Some of the markets for good leather are people who make slingshots. usaslingshotforum.com<br>Also a lot of bushcrafters use leather. &nbsp;bushcraftusa.com

 

[cleanheart]

<br><br>Interesting. I could do that easily. I am also a member at bushcraftusa. Never really thought about slingshots. There are quite a few leather workers over there tho.....but there are other sites.&nbsp;<br>Thanks for the idea lampliter.