Women Only Gonna take a chance and talk about the awful depression

[dhurley65]

I have suffered with depression for 65 years. I always think the grass will be greener someplace else. I can't do projects anymore my hands won't let me. I have moved so many times in my life and that's why I think van life would make me happy. I love meeting new people ! But I think if I got bored one place just go to another. How are we ever going to know if we don't try?
Can't be anymore depressed then just sitting and watching life pass us bye. If you do try life in a van best of luck to you and God bless.

 

[G0ldengirl68]

Can't be anymore depressed then just sitting and watching life pass us bye. If you do try life in a van best of luck to you and God bless.

I wished I'd seen this before, I don't know why I miss so many posts/replies, it's not the sites fault, it's me remembering to subscribe, or maybe my "settings".  Also, I may have screwed up by unsubscribing because I thought it was a dead-thread.  Live and learn hey!

I love what you had to say, and your life sounds so much like mine, I was never anywhere in 68 years, for more than 3 years.  That included my childhood.  I think my mom had to feel the same as I do, and was married 8 times (maybe some were just "uncles" but she didn't want us to know they were just living together).  

I am going to try, and just met with a nice couple, and he does "builds" to help people.  We just supply the materials & I plan to help all I can, unless he wants me to go away   I can do that too.  Whatever helps him most.  Pretty amazing people out there in Nomad Land :heart: I would love to hear from you again @Dhurley65,  and anyone else as I will be sure to subscribe here, Denise alias G0ldengirl68

 

[RoamerRV428]

Super thrilled to hear you are doing keto plan diet.

I went one step further....I am doing zero carb lifestyle. I tell ya the minute I dropped all the plants my anxiety and some depression issues just 'floated away' and that brain fog lifted and wow, what a change.....so if you go 'a tad more narrow toward more of a very heavy meat based keto lifestyle, you truly might improve possible issues more with yourself.....so many say Keto and into Carnivore truly helps with all that......but also as we know 'being engaged in life' and active with others is truly a blessing to have friends and chat and know someone is out there being with you, in your ballpark, in your circle ya know............I really loved reading your posts and I think I see nothing but darn great times ahead for you And when I hit the road full on in a shorter time now, oh yea I might just see ya out there....I can't wait....got to get my kid into college and my free time is coming!! And I am gonna dive in and roam the world finding adventures that suit me and make me happy just like you are gonna do Cool

 

[G0ldengirl68]

HI Roamer Your plan sounds awesome, I can feel your excitement!

Keto is the best thing that happened for me, and I can go lower, about 20g carbs a day, some days it just happens. For now I won't try to do that as there are some other issues I'm dealing with trying to figure out like tinnitus, and tremors that can get pretty bad. I just believe nutrition and supplementing deficiencies are the answer as I am getting better.

I do believe being out of a depressing place where there are so many very elderly people that stand no chance of escaping the lifestyle they are "living". If I can just get out there with people on the move, I would be way busier, and relax when I wanted. Be planning my next roadtrip too

 

[RoamerRV428]

well moving is a great thing.
the body is meant to move but the mind is meant to explore ya know.
even if the body is frail the mind can still become better and can still contribute and be explosive in thought about life and subjects and more.

So key being emmerse yourself in what draws you in any way

you do not ever have to be active to participate. Many who can't move like in wheelchairs or thru life med issues are trapped in non-movement type life but participation in thought and connection and knowledge and giving to others thru that is a key factor for survival of mind/spirit/and body.

Go find what suits you.........once there........go all in It is there for you to grab, put that hand out and friggin' grab it

 

[maki2]

Two things bring meaning to our lives, work and love.

Work does not just mean an income generating job. It can be a mother raising children, a person raising a garden. It might be a traveler in a van who sets the goal of visiting all 49 states they can drive to.

But I suspect the underlying key to the issue of depression is for you still lying in your nutrition. Seek out some foods that are strong pre cursors to the production of endorphins. Get a lot more of them that are safe for a diabetic to eat into your daily diet. All you have to lose by trying that is the blah blue feelings.

Put the focus on foods that help aleviate depression and keep a chart of your moods. That too is meaningful work. Work that can be documented and then used to help other travelers who suffer with those same borderline depressions.

 

[mattvei]

do a search on depression in Bob's YouTube channel There are support groups of nomads that meet via phone to help each other with what you are describing That may be a benefit

 

[Deborah]

Seems my mornings are usually so good, .... then 3 ish in the afternoon hits..... Next day same thing.... I don't know what to do with myself.

I liked that show. Goldengirls. The bible teaches to go out in twos. That means at least one friend. One can put a thousand to flight but two can put ten thousand to flight, meaning we can do much better with a likeminded friend. The simple acts of friendship may take your mind off unproductive thoughts or fears.

I wonder if any other women out there were like me in any of these ways, and felt a lot better once they got out of living in an apt.

...women getting "out there" and I so want to be one of them.... it would truly be a better life, but I could be wrong too, and there lies the fear of yet another failure. Denise

You are much like others here. imho. If you are bored then its time for a adventure for a change. It be especially nice if you have someone to adventure with.

 

[iansolyn]

It seems to me that I had depression for more than half of my life, but I have never consulted a doctor. I was just struggling and continued living broken.

 

[user 22017]

Folks, I'm really going out on a limb on this one. First of all, there is little to no scientific data showing that nutrition is a major cause of depression or that modifications to your diet will alleviate the symptoms.

Russell Brand addressed depression this week. He shared links to new research showing that depression is not caused by a chemical imbalance. Russell might be hard to listen to for some, but he posted seven links as sources for that show (which covers depression and politicians). Some of you might want to, at least, click through to the links.

I'm with you about not being a hermit. It is healthier to be with others.

The article Russell's show is based on: https://www.theguardian.com/society...-of-antidepressants-after-survey-on-serotonin

His show about depression:

 

[thebarefootbadger]

Wondering how the OP is doing.

Personally, I've made a rather depressing - no pun intended - discovery. I can't drink. I was never anyone's definition of an alcoholic, but I loved one beer or glass of red wine with dinner every night, I enjoyed the little buzz, the cheer, the slightly lessened inhibitions. It's taken me 59 years to put it together. A happy little drink with dinner - ONE drink, mind you - made me ... unstable the next day. I had more drama in my head, but no energy. I often couldn't seem to focus or be productive and yet I couldn't let go and relax either - "spinning my wheels", I'd be really upset about my lack of productivity and glued to the couch in the same moment. My mood seems to fluctuate in ways that weren't connected with the reality of my life, a lot of anger, a lot of tired, hopeless feelings.

I decided to make an experiment. Was the connection I thought I saw real?

Well, yes, for me it was. I'm not saying being a teetotaler has me leaping around like I'm on X. For all I know, it's just that I get a better night's sleep now. But my mood is more stable, less fatalistic, less dramatic. I feel a little smarter, a little less fractured and frazzled. I can ride out a bad mood without having an internal tantrum, I find myself able to be a little more patient and hold my tongue, even when it's myself I'm frustrated with.

Anyone else find depression lifted or at least lessened if they didn't drink? My experiment unhappily validated my hypothesis.

 

[Monica99]

..still having when I thought it had lifted a lot when I had gotten on a low-carb way of eating. There are lots of changes, good ones for sure, but I still have times I am so down I fear I won't get back up again. Like now. Seems my mornings are usually so good, get things done, do errands, laundry, talk to people online, then 3 ish in the afternoon hits. Sometimes I'll get out and take a walk, and with Mimmie the dog, I do get out 5 times a day, but when her and I head back for our door I think she feel as down as I do. We don't want to go back in but we have to do dinner, and then the rest of the evening is the same. Watch some Roku TV, or some of my DVD series like Murder She Wrote, or Goldengirls. Sometime lately I get interested in something on my "dream-site" CRVL, and the time passes so fast and it's bedtime and a book. Next day same thing.

I'm just rambling away here, but I don't know what to do with myself. I don't really have any productive hobbies like knitting, or sewing, and besides that, I can't stick with one thing. I get these big ideas like I'll write a book, never happens, or I'll take up sewing my own clothes, never happens. The only thing I seem good at is surviving. I did really good learning about Type 2 Diabetes and beating it so far without medicine. No meds is mainly because any script I've been given, including anti-depressants at times past, made me have worse headaches, worse tremors or some other side-effect.

I guess why I posted this was to ask what might be a stupid question. But I wonder if any other women out there were like me in any of these ways, and felt a lot better once they got out of living in an apt. or home in one place with lots of "stuff" that really meant nothing to them. It hasn't brought me happiness, and I am always searching for it. Maybe just contentment, happiness is fleeting and for me, depends a lot on things happening in my life. Nothing's happening in my life anymore, and I'm not looking forward to anything.

I'm sorry if this is maybe inappropriate, but I really have no one to really talk to except myself. I have to take a lot of responsibility for that too, don't blame anyone else, I truly don't. I'm too smart to think it's all about other people in my life.

I'm mesmerized by women getting "out there" all kinds of women from all kinds of backgrounds, and I so want to be one of them. I guess I think it would truly be a better life, but I could be wrong too, and there lies the fear of yet another failure. Denise

PS Now I'm trying to decide if I should hit the "post thread". What have I got to lose, my pride, nah, that would be a good thing. Reminds me of how I didn't have a problem with wearing a mask because I feel like I've worn one most of my life

oh Denise, you know when you said " I really have no one to really talk to except myself", that is what happens to each one of us, even to those that have someone to live with. It is not that you're the one alone, we are all alone, and when someone has a life partner, they are being distracted, being busy, but they too can be found in a situation where they do not have anyone else to talk to.
I feel that I've understand what you're going through. Making it clear to yourself that you don't have anyone to talk to except yourself seems rough but it is great. I think we all need to realise that we're born alone and we die alone, and in between, there are people yes, but the most important person that helps you live, that gets you through each day, that helps you breath, that is there for Mimmie, and you know very well she needs you too.

You have yourself Denise, and it took a lot of courage to say what you said. And it isn't because you're in an apartment, a big house or a tiny / huge van, with sewing or any other hobby. We all have it in ourselves, Denise. And I did or do sometimes feel what you're saying or go through times like you're describing it. Use a mirror, look at your face, your eyes, see and feel the love you have in yourself, for what it keeps you alive, you're breathing every moment, and you're there.

I would have thought the van community in the USA is big and there are people whom with you can share things like having a coffee, walking your dogs and spend some time together, and share the "loneliness" each one of us is going through.

 

[user 22017]

I would have thought the van community in the USA is big and there are people whom with you can share things like having a coffee, walking your dogs and spend some time together, and share the "loneliness" each one of us is going through.

Hi Monica,

Some folks from this forum offered to meet Denise and help her with her build. IIRC, they did meet, but Denise decided vanlife (nomadic living) wasn't for her. I think she recently returned to this forum... briefly.

Anyway, she posted about not doing vanlife somewhere here.

 

[G0ldengirl68]

oh Denise, you know when you said " I really have no one to really talk to except myself", that is what happens to each one of us, even to those that have someone to live with. It is not that you're the one alone, we are all alone, and when someone has a life partner, they are being distracted, being busy, but they too can be found in a situation where they do not have anyone else to talk to.
I feel that I've understand what you're going through. Making it clear to yourself that you don't have anyone to talk to except yourself seems rough but it is great. I think we all need to realise that we're born alone and we die alone, and in between, there are people yes, but the most important person that helps you live, that gets you through each day, that helps you breath, that is there for Mimmie, and you know very well she needs you too.

You have yourself Denise, and it took a lot of courage to say what you said. And it isn't because you're in an apartment, a big house or a tiny / huge van, with sewing or any other hobby. We all have it in ourselves, Denise. And I did or do sometimes feel what you're saying or go through times like you're describing it. Use a mirror, look at your face, your eyes, see and feel the love you have in yourself, for what it keeps you alive, you're breathing every moment, and you're there.

I would have thought the van community in the USA is big and there are people whom with you can share things like having a coffee, walking your dogs and spend some time together, and share the "loneliness" each one of us is going through.

Hi Monica,

I so appreciate your letter this morning, I am still trying to figure out what I want to do for sure but no matter where I live, there I'll be, and you message is very pertinent for me and the ways I get to feeling sometimes. Right now I spend more time avoiding people that live around me because I have a ton of anxiety, I guess "social anxiety". If my friends from back in the day heard me say that they would laugh their butts off thinking I was kidding. I was all about partying, going new places (been to most of the US) worked for temp agencies for years, it was so fun for me. My dad was like that too. But the downside was, I ended up "only" living on SS.

Now, to be honest, I've been out of work since I was 62 (69) and I'm scared to even try a job again. But I still have these ideas that I can work seasonal jobs, and to do that I need a comfortable enough rig to live in. I knew, finally, my small Mazda B3000 would be too small for me. I used to work on a ranch in Wyoming in the laundry and it was the best Summer of my adult life! Although back then, I was able to live in one of their cabins which was wonderfully rustic and fun! I'm still in good shape so I can work, it's just scarey to step out of my comfort zone. I know it would help the depression.

Right now, I am very close on a waitlist for an apartment back in my home-State of Oregon. Much better than where I am living, and everything is familiar there, I know my way around. It's very nice to meet you, and glad I checked in today. I have my alerts on, but hadn't gotten any. I better check my settings again Are you a full-timer btw @Monica99 ? Thanks again, Denise

 

[G0ldengirl68]

Hi Monica,

Some folks from this forum offered to meet Denise and help her with her build. IIRC, they did meet, but Denise decided vanlife (nomadic living) wasn't for her. I think she recently returned to this forum... briefly.

Anyway, she posted about not doing vanlife somewhere here.

Yes, this is true, and the reason was I had some sort of reaction to the Covid shots I received, or, possibly migraine. My whole left side went numb in the morning of August 2nd around 6 a.m., while I was camped next to friends from here. Wonderful friends I need to add, as I had to hobble over and crying wondering what was happening to my body, and tell my friends I needed help. They took care of me til some firefighters showed up first and were checking me out until paramedics showed up and hauled me down 35 miles to our small emergency room here in town.

By the way, it was the morning they and I had decided to start work on my truck. When I was sent home to my apartment, my friends loaded up my dog, who is tiny but wouldn't let @abnorm even enter my tent so I don't know how they did it. All my junk too, and drove my truck down river 35 miles to me, then insisted on bringing up my belongings. I don't think I ever had anyone do that much for me in my life. I'll never forget that @abnorm

I've been to 2 specialists over the past year, lots of tests, and zero sign of stroke/TIA or any heart issues. So only God knows I guess. So yes, I decided I shouldn't be thinking about going out and being the gypsy I used to be, but rather be focused on my health. I've been very active the last year, more so than any other time in my life, as far as actual exercise including weight-training at my gym. I figure the way things are in the world, I better be able to do as much for myself as possible

 

[user 22017]

Yes, this is true, and the reason was I had some sort of reaction to the Covid shots I received, or, possibly migraine. My whole left side went numb in the morning of August 2nd around 6 a.m., while I was camped next to friends from here. Wonderful friends I need to add, as I had to hobble over and crying wondering what was happening to my body, and tell my friends I needed help. They took care of me til some firefighters showed up first and were checking me out until paramedics showed up and hauled me down 35 miles to our small emergency room here in town....

Hi Denise,

Hope all is well with you. I forgot about all that (ambulance, etc.). My memory is horrible. So glad you are back on the forum

 

[scaredycat72]

I can relate to your post a lot. I'm ADHD and I get like that when I'm bored. As long as I have adventure, new experiences, things to look forward to, and something to be passionate about, I'm good. Sitting around doing nothing? I lose my zest for life. And being at home is the easiest way for me to lose my zest for life because I get in a rut. I do the same thing everyday and even when I want to do something different, or start to do something different, the rut pulls me back in.

Getting off the internet, not watching TV, getting off social media, and vanlife save my sanity every time. I also bounced from hobby to hobby, interest to interest, never finishing anything because my interest would always be pulled back to TV, social media, and the Internet. Instead of living my life, I watch or read about other people living theirs. It's ridiculous. And I have a ton of friend but I also struggle with anxiety so the more I let myself isolate, the more I want to isolate. Living in my SUV stops that nonsense.

For me, vanlife saved my sanity.

 

[elisa7joy]

I can relate to your post a lot. I'm ADHD and I get like that when I'm bored. As long as I have adventure, new experiences, things to look forward to, and something to be passionate about, I'm good. Sitting around doing nothing? I lose my zest for life. And being at home is the easiest way for me to lose my zest for life because I get in a rut. I do the same thing everyday and even when I want to do something different, or start to do something different, the rut pulls me back in.

Getting off the internet, not watching TV, getting off social media, and vanlife save my sanity every time. I also bounced from hobby to hobby, interest to interest, never finishing anything because my interest would always be pulled back to TV, social media, and the Internet. Instead of living my life, I watch or read about other people living theirs. It's ridiculous. And I have a ton of friend but I also struggle with anxiety so the more I let myself isolate, the more I want to isolate. Living in my SUV stops that nonsense.

For me, vanlife saved my sanity.

I also have ADHD, plus anxiety and depression. My mental health kinda kicked me in the ass five or six years ago. Medication management is crucial for me. A lot of people feel bad for me living in a minivan with two dogs. Tbh I would love to have a place, at least for a shower and space for the dogs. However, I'd still be in my vehicle most of the time. It's been the number 2 thing to help with my mental health. Being able to see all the movement and people around me is helpful. I love the feeling of the engine running, well not in my current ride but a good vehicle.... I see this is a really old post but it's nice to know other women feel some relief being outside of walls

 

[LargeMarge]

... a shower and space for the dogs.... outside of walls

.
a)
For a shower, please see our introduction, the sections on our Shower Gizmo
https://vanlivingforum.com/threads/expeditionvehicle-build.44908/#post-576110.
b)
We somehow managed to accumulate six (6) Heelers.
And 'yes', everybody in the choir has an opinion.
.
c)
A stand-still house?
I will give my usual response anytime some bum or bumette asks me 'got a cigarette?':
* "I am too young to smoke."
I turn 72yo in a few weeks, I am too young for a stand-still house.

 

[maki2]

I take chromium picolonate. It keeps the blues away. Found to be 80% effective in studies at leading medical university testing. A mineral found in many drugstore supplement aisles. Not of course going to work for a bipolar or manic depression but good for the most common type. Helps regulate blood sugar too.