My Main Fear

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Hi Rainy and welcome to the forum! I know you've been here a little while, but perhaps no one has given you the "formal" welcome/hello.

Speaking of that, somewhere around here there's a post that the mods usually put a link up for all the new members. Lots good stuff in there, but I don't know how to do that (add a link to the rules and tips post).

As far as your fears post goes, first of all - thank you for being so honest about your feelings. Being vulnerable isn't easy. Admitting you feel vulnerable isn't easy. Even though I don't share those particular fears I do recognize that a lot if people do. I agree that exposure to that environment with the help of experienced people you trust to show you the ropes would probably be helpful. I also think that self defense training would be helpful too.

This is because it seems that you aren't afraid of the wild animals that live way back in the boonies, but are fearful of being the victim of a human. A lot of people are afraid of the isolation of being alone and stalked in an unfamiliar area (especially at night). Sorry for being so blunt about that, but it does no one any good to sugarcoat it. That is the stuff of horror movies. Literally. We have been taught to fear strangers in the wilderness.

But there are things you can do to avoid being the victim of a human. I'd say the biggest thing would be go to a self defense training from someone who really knows what they are teaching. There you will learn that being a survivor requires a certain mentality. You do what you need to do. Really, you can't prevent yourself from being the victim of another human. People are unethical and inhumane sometimes. And people of every age and gender can be victims of this. But they can also be survivors. Yes, there's perceived safety in numbers. So finding a caravan might rest your mind. But really unless you yourself live in a cage, you will never be 100% safe every minute of every day from an unhinged person.

Im not saying this to freak you out. Really, I'm not. This next part might sound harsh (so brace yourself) but really I think that I haven't said anything here that you haven't already been thinking about. Think about it like this, if you are alone boondocking with no neighbors in miles, and you wake up to that stranger who's broke in to your rig and is attacking you - what kind of training are you going to want to have for that situation? If that's what you are afraid of then that's the situation you should get training to deal with.

And maybe look up some real statistics about the actual numbers of assaults in remote areas vs in towns. It may be that you are in more danger in town than out on your own.

Again, welcome to the forum. I'm so glad that you found it. There's much information on here. I'm sorry if this post has freaked you out, but again I'm not real big on sugarcoating. The only way to make a muscle stronger is to work it. And I really only know of two ways to get better at something -1) training and practice, and -2)trial and error. Some things are better to learn from training than trial and error.

Again, welcome.

~angie

Sent from my VS501 using Tapatalk
 
Some of the responses here are reasonable, some are not. In Az. there are boondocking places with hundreds if not thousands of folks spending the winter in LTVA. Any one sketchy would stand out like a sore thumb and would leave quickly. Boondocking communities are much more welcoming and helpful than most any neighborhood you have ever lived in. The modern culture media wants to scare you, they are not going to tell you everything is ok, where's the ratings in that. For instance, in the Imperial Dam LTVA there are likely 50,000 folks out there. No murders, no rapes, no kidnaps, no shootings. I'd match that with almost any city that size in the country. The reality is your fears are real to you and you will have to decide if this life is something you want enough to face them down or not. I will tell you that most, if not all of the finest folks I have ever met, I met on the road. Facing the unknown is tough but doable. Do you want it enough to try?
 
I've had the same thoughts about being isolated in the woods and unprotected, but I've already been in that situation many times without anything bad happening. I've decided to start boondocking in places I feel are safe, like Walmart parking lots, and as I get more experience with it, I'll become more confident about choosing rural places to sleep. I know already that I'm not going to want to caravan all the time. I'm pretty independent and like my solitude.
 
Horror movies, and Zombie thrillers have put a sense of dread into many of our thoughts as we stumble around in the dark. The best way to alleviate these fears is to face them head on, and test ourselves. I choose to every day carry a flashlight, sharp pocket knife, and sometimes my CCW when I feel threatened. I told myself that I wasn't going to be a victim that was paralyzed by the inability to see clearly, or to defend myself.

Honestly, the only way to get over these fears is to systematically, and carefully put yourself in situations that bring this fear on, and rationally figure out what is the problem.

I have been in situations where the lights go out unexpectedly, or it gets dark quickly away from home. This is the reason I always carry a pocket flashlight. I have also been in areas where I felt threatened of bodily harm, and felt defenseless, this is why I carry a 4" blade pocket knife. My sense of well being is better now.
 
Your fears are very common. I think you need some good experiences to 'talk-down' the fear tape in your mind. Bob wrote a really thoughtful essay about fears, you should read it if you haven't already.

Basic-do you have a rig set-up that you can get up and leave easily if you feel threatened? Van or class-c or do you have to break down and hook up a trailer to leave in the middle of the night? Could you practice driving away quickly? Always try to park so you are facing out.

Maybe you have some skills that could be useful to other campers/boondockers that you could offer if you met people. See yourself as a "johnny on the spot" camper, not a victim in waiting. Make a campfire and invite people over, cook something, do some first aid, ask someone if they want to go on a hike, offer to walk a dog, pick up trash together, offer to help dig someone out if they are stuck. Etc, etc...Do you carry jumper cables? Do you know how to use them?  I mean you aren't always out alone by yourself. Perhaps you could seek out dispersed camping spots with a few other rigs nearby.

Is it possible you could practice boondocking while temporarily renting a very cheap room in a sticks/bricks near a National Forest? I've seen some rooms for rent in smaller cities that are as cheap as $300 to $500 a month. Don't pick a big city like San Fran, LA or Phoenix where the traffic getting in and out is a nightmare. Practice camping out then go back to the safety of a house. Using a smallish-town as a base, maybe you could meet others to boondock/camp with?

Admins-has there ever been any threads about setting up a buddy-meet-up? Where folks could seek out fellow boondockers to travel with, not as elaborate as a caravan and not a dating/mating thing, but a fellow-traveler program?

ps, I'm boondocking in Utah in March, seeking a buddy to travel with!

Dellaterra
 
Yes, very common fear, based mostly on nothing (I am trying to belittle you, hear me out). The actual facts state that you are MUCH safer in the boondocks by yourself than anywhere near a group of others. Why do we feel it is safer to be around others, I do not know. It is factually and statistically false. Still, it isn't easy to get past that, I understand.

The truth is, even in a crowd of like minded people, you can't rely or expect them to come running to your rescue if something ever happens. The majority of people will stay in thier RVs and watch you get murdered than step outside and try to stop an assailant. It is understandable as most value thier own lives above others (it is human).

If you do not feel safe doing it (and prepared to take care of yourself 100%) than maybe you should not do it. There is nothing wrong with that. Do what you are comfortable with and enjoy it. Or, break those walls down and go for it.

The get together convoys are a great way to start too

Good luck
 
Van-Tramp said:
...(I am trying to belittle you, hear me out)...

Yeah! Hear him out!! Lol.

I can guarantee you VT forgot to add the "not" in there. Funny stuff!
 
I’ve been awake at night worrying about being too cold. I’ve had a stroke and my left leg doesn’t work well in the cold. I suspect that the reality is that I’ll have more occasions when I’m too hot. I’ve also been worried about being a burden to others if I get sick on the road. I’m 68, and also have a stent in my heart, and it might plug up. Guess I’ll find out when I get on the road March first.
 
This thread really has gotten me thinking the past few days. I’m still intending to get on the road March one. And I have fearful spells about it. The current one is a fear that I’ll be uncomfortable in my van, and in camp. I’ve camped comfortably all my life in the boondocks, but now that I’m 68, after a stroke, I’m worried that I won’t be tough enough anymore. Vulnerable feelings of old age, I suppose.
 
Maybe try out van living, a few days at a time, before you go full time, to ease into it and see if it is something you’re going to be able to handle.

If not, don’t do it.

As we get older, I think, we’re even more aware of our time limited experience on this earth.

It’s important to come to terms with the inevitability of death, have your affairs in order and be at peace with it.
 
baby steps. baby steps toward how to conquer any troubles you feel you need to conquer in your life.
best of luck hitting the road and finding your path thru it all! You will find the way that suits you.
 
When I have ever felt fear or apprehension it means I am doing something that I have never done before.  That's the time when you should do it to grow as a person.  Do it once and live through your fears.  It makes it much easier to do it twice.

There is evil out there, but it is far and few between your own imagination.  I imagine someone breaking into my house and doing unspeakable things.  The odds of that really happening is, in reality, pretty low.  You are a strong person and can conquer this fear.  Maybe think about how strong you are instead of how fearful you are.  Meditation helps.
 

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