Moving out, moving on.

[Rugster]

Hi, people, new guy here from Tallahassee. Seems a huge life change is imminent for me and my two kids, 10 and 8. A divorce is probably in the cards and I have had to really think about where I'm going, how I'm going to get there and what I'm going to do when I get there.

After a number of days thinking everything over, I think a change will provide a lot of positive changes for both parents which will certainly end up benefitting the kids, although it won't be easy.

I've always been a bit of a black sheep and would love to really head out but with my kids and shared custody in the works, I'm not leaving the area.

I have no desire to pay rent here, rent is crazy, with two major Universities and State Government keeping rent high, wages low...and it would seriously crimp my plans of moving on.

So, living small is the way to go. I have a spot to put whatever I decide to buy and won't necessarily have to worry about codes and all that, depending on what I can find.

I have a very small budget to start with, maybe 2-3k...

I am thinking of finding an older Class C or small camper to tow to the spot and live in it. But, I'm not too sure my budget will provide a capable, roadworthy vehicle. However, it would not have to travel and I would be able to save a large chunk of money I had been spending on rent so could fairly quickly afford repairs and have promised to myself on my weeks with the kids, on Friday, I'd pick them up from school and we'd go camping at the beach...

Another interesting idea I have been kicking around is setting up a portable storage shed as a tiny house for me and my kids. They love camping in the cabins at KOA's so maybe they'd see half the month spent with me as camping time

The storage shed/play house idea would surely require a lot of insulation and modifications but there would only be a down payment and small monthly payments, which would not be hard to make. And many of the models have a loft and my youngest has been saying she wants to live in a two story....

So, after lurking here for a year or so and wanting to stop wasting half my monthly income on a house I don't own, it looks like it is soon to be a reality.

More information: my kids are pretty cool, and would probably be ok with whatever I find, and we would live on my parents land, so they'd be able to hang out there if they needed to so I think they'd be ok, especially if the kids get both parents back....if that makes any sense.

So, thanks for reading, sorry for the long post. I would appreciate any advice, information, or thoughts.

 

[cyndi]

Welcome to the CRVL forums, Rugster! 2k is plenty to buy an older trailer in decent condition, up north. I don't know if I'd go that low on a class C or A where a good engine is necessary. If you've got some DIY skills, you should be good to go!

I think teaching the kids to live a good life leaving a small footprint is invaluable. Good for you and awesome for your kids!

Anyways, to help you learn the ins and outs of these forums, if you haven't already, this "Tips & Tricks" post lists some helpful information to get you started. We look forward to hearing more from you.

 

[akrvbob]

You don't say, but do you have a vehicle you can tow a trailer with? My first thought is like Cyndi to buy an older travel trailer. Then you don't need it to be reliable, just water-tight.

My second thought is to get a cargo trailer and convert it. a 7x12 would be small but adequate for you. The advantages is they are much lighter and much better made. You would have to convert it but that might be fun for you and the kids as a project together.

I think the shed idea is a really great one!! However, that's essentially what the cargo trailer is and the cargo trailer can be taken to the beach or on vacations!

My story is a lot like yours. I got divorced and had two boys 8 and 10. I moved into a box van with a 8x12 box and put in my bed and a set of bunkbeds. I had a TV and a Playstation and my kids spent weekends and even longer with me. I think they loved it!!

Eventually my ex-wife and I became friends again and she let me park outside her house and use her electricity. The kids came home from school and visited with me and then went inside and had dinner and did homework. It worked really well for all of us!

Divorce is really hard on the kids, but if you and she work hard and with you thinking outside the box, you can make it as good as it possibly can be!!!!

We're here to help in any way we can! I wish you and your family the very best!
Bob

 

[Rugster]

I don't have a vehicle that can tow but would be able to get the trailer moved, if I could find a decent trailer. My plan is once we have a home, whether it is a travel trailer, motorhome, portable building then with the monthly savings, I'd start saving up for either a towing vehicle or motorhome. I think it's time we go see places

I have been looking at storage sheds at the big shops and found one with a partial glass roof....the photo for the building showed the shed being used as a home, had pictures on the wall and a bed under the glass.

 

[bcbullet]

My friend I feel for you. As a divorced guy myself I had to make some choices as well. I may have spent a bit more, but the end result will likely be the same. Check out the thread:
http://advrider.com/forums/showpost.php?p=23743845&postcount=3963

 

[One Awesome Inch]

I'm in a very similar situation. Two young kids... divorce is a very real possibility. At this point I am holding on for the kids, but the bottom could fall out at any time. I love Bob's "happy ending" story with him parked out front and his kids visiting him at their leisure. That has definitely given me food for thought.

As to your living situation I think Bob is really onto something. You could get a cargo trailer, rent or borrow a truck to pull it to your parent's property and really set it up nice. I think that scenario would give you the most value for your dollar. There are alot of junky motorhomes and travel trailers out there are just one problem after another. Best of luck!

 

[Dardrian]

Hi! Welcome to the forums. I'm located about an hour north of you. Unfortunately I don't have any real-world experience with the mobile life yet, so I can't really offer any advice.

 

[bcbullet]

My friend I feel for you. As a divorced guy myself I had to make some choices as well. I may have spent a bit more, but the end result will likely be the same. Check out the thread:
http://advrider.com/forums/showpost.php?p=23743845&postcount=3963

Sorry, should have given the back story. I live 3 hours from my kids and was sick of paying for hotels on top of child support, travel, depreciation etc. I threw this rig together out of an ex police surveillance truck and have never looked back. We will have enjoyed this lifestyle for three years come February. We have enjoyed spending every second weekend in the truck and I cannot say enough good things about it. Literally the best decision I have ever made. We stealth camp around southern British Columbia and absolutely LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Rugster]

Bcbullet, wow! That looks nice! Here is my contribution to ADVRider: http://advrider.com/forums/showthread.php?t=752856 .

Unity, I was/am still working to see if it can be worked out, but I realized that it may be a better thing in the long run for the break to happen and have both parents recover/improve/repair ourselves. Not trying to get too deep but maybe that makes sense for you.

Thanks for all the replies, it helps to know others in my shoes have also made some pretty interesting choices on how to move forward and have come out ok.

I have found some very inexpensive slide in campers locally, but I can not figure out how a slide in with no over hang on the tailgate end could sleep 4 adults and two kids.

 

[coolmom42]

Seems to me your best bet would be a small mobile home or decent size travel trailer you could get moved to your location.

You MUST have a stable address, with fit accomodation for your kids, or your custody/visitation rights will be compromised. Whatever you have, it must have functional plumbing including a shower, toilet, & hot water, heat, a place to store/prepare food, and adequate sleeping locations for each child. If the children are not the same gender, and are past a certain age, they will be required to have adequate privacy for dressing and bathing.

Not saying don't do it, just be aware of these considerations.

 

[Rugster]

Oh, no matter what I decide to do, the kids are my first priority. They will be taken care of. My wife and I talked and I think we both agree we will be far better Parents apart. We are going to go look at the RVs/TTs at the local RV lot tomorrow.

 

[Rugster]

Yeah, I don't think there is a lot of animosity between us, I think we both realize a break is needed. Won't even make it official yet, for various reasons. We're both good people and want the best for everyone involved.

 

[gypsychic]

Hi. I just wanted to give you a quick note from the kids point of view (as an adult). My parents split when I was 7-8. My dad at times lived in a boat and at other times lived far away so we ended up tent camping, cabin camping or living out of the car once or twice. IT WAS AWESOME! I loved every minute of it and still remember all the good times and even the not so great times with fondness. I learned a lot also. That's probably where I get my wanderlust from.

But my mom did use it as a way to have my dad's visitation changed. Mind you this was 30+ years ago so things may be different now. Man was I angry with my mom. Although we always had food and shelter my mom made it seem like it wasn't enough. From a kids point of view it was great, always an adventure, and like I said before I learned a lot. Looking at it through adult eyes I can see how the courts could view it but I really think that it wrong. I guess it depends on the intent of the parent on how and why they are living this way.

Anyways, just be cautious but I wanted to let you know that your kids will look back at these times as helping to define who they are and what they want out of life. That it's ok to do things that are different and not like everybody else.

Just my two cents.

As your family goes through this adjustment I wish for you grace, strength and patience. Best of luck!

 

[compassrose]

2k is plenty to buy an older trailer in decent condition, up north. I don't know if I'd go that low on a class C or A where a good engine is necessary. If you've got some DIY skills, you should be good to go!

Back in 2005 we found a 1978 Midas Mini (Class C) in SC. But the friend that was also looking ended up buying it for $3K (seller didn't stand a chance with two highly experienced fleamarketers haggling over price) to use over the winter with the understanding we would get it next. We paid $2K for the Class C. Tune up on the engine, rebuilt part of the rear section of the RV part (lousy roof racks leak... avoid those) and replaced a little framing in the cabover under the window (those leak too). Other than remodeling to suit us, we did nothing else. Lived in it fulltime from 2006 - 2010 when we moved into the skoolie. Now my daughter has it and the engine is still going strong. She did rebuild the tranny after it got stuck in 1st gear.

I'm a bit biased, I suggest buying a metal roofed converted school bus and remodeling it while you live in it. Watch out for rust (metal's version of rot). I also suggest that you build a bathhouse with open or screened area on your home base. That way you can not only have a full bathroom but a laundry area as well. And a place to spread out a little on the rainy days.

 

[Seraphim]

Oh, no matter what I decide to do, the kids are my first priority. They will be taken care of. My wife and I talked and I think we both agree we will be far better Parents apart. We are going to go look at the RVs/TTs at the local RV lot tomorrow.

It's good your wife is in on this decision, and you are working together to make a second home. Hearing that allayed any reservations I personally had. I've not been there myself, but have been involved in many cases where one spouse could make life miserable for the other when it came to visitations, etc.

I'd third the trailer - you can get more space less expensively, and change the tow vehicle as needed, but the kid's ' home' will remain consistent.

Good luck.

 

[Rugster]

Thanks for the posts and advice, and special thanks to gypsychic for the post. I think the kids will enjoy the adventure. Things are .... weird, but I think I'm moving on with my plan and think it will be a travel trailer to start with. Slowly broaching the idea to the kids and showing them craigslist pictures. Waiting on some funds that should be here shortly, then I'll see what I need to do.

 

[Rugster]

Well, damn. Probably don't need to say more than that but it looks like I have no idea what is happening. I'm reminded of one of my favorite songs, 'Should I stay or Should I Go', by The Clash.

I have still been looking and really did a lot of research on cargo vans today (and watched a hilarious build video today, that guy was great) and that might work great for me. But I still like the idea of a Class C.

Who knows, certain other people may come home in a great mood