Hello all...I could use a word of encouragement

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wilsonbubba

New member
Joined
May 18, 2021
Messages
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Location
Pennsylvania
Hi all, 
   I am just beginning to look for a van and seriously looking into  van life.  I'm 62, still working. I've worked all my life and never gotten above poverty level.  I've always worked as a caregiver, which pays little, but I've enjoyed my work and I was good at it. 
   What has me down right now is my daughter constantly telling me what a bad idea it is for me to think about living in a van, and how because of my health and things this is crazy.  She thinks I should rent a room somewhere, or get a room mate and rent a place.  Both of these things are still very expensive for me, and I wouldn't feel comfortable.  I feel like I would just be working to sleep in a place with furniture.  I'm just feel discouraged.  Of course it's scary to try something new, but I want to try.  I want to spend my life living, not just staying "safer".  
   If anyone has been through this kind of thing with their kids and can share some encouragement, please let me hear from you.    Also, anyone in the Pennsylvania region with tips for winter and summer...love to hear from you too.  Anyone know about a decent van for cheap??? :)
Hope to hear from you!  Blessings!
Phyllis
 
Check out seasonal jobs with housing at coolworks.com maybe you could try being nomadic for a few months at a time until you have enough savings to buy what you need and see what others do.
 
Welcome to the CRVL forums! To help you learn the ins and outs of these forums, this "Tips, Tricks and Rules" post lists some helpful information to get you started.

Most of our rules boil down to two simple over-riding principles: 1) What you post should provide good information (like your introductory post), and 2) Any response to someone else's post should make them feel glad they are part of this forum community.

We look forward to hearing more from you.
 
I'm 57. I've spent my whole life doing for others and caring for others and carrying the burden of others on my shoulders because it was my job, or it was family, or because of a sense of obligation. My kids are grown, I'm the oldest of any of my family and everyone else has passed, I still have my house and a lot of inherited things to deal with that for years have held me back and held me down. Recently though I've decided to stop letting all of that run my life and to do for me and live for me.

If I can do it you can too!

Another income stream that you might consider is reselling. My daughter does it and does pretty well with it. Basically she finds things at thrift and discount stores and yard sales and other places that she knows people are looking for and will pay decent money for (there are websites out there that actually list what's in demand). Not the same as "resellers" who buy all of a brand new thing and hold people for ransom for stupid scalped prices, she does it fair and still does well because not everyone has time to search for things and it's worth it to them to pay for found things. Basically all you really need is an "eye" for the right things, a place online to sell them, and places to mail them from. It does take consistent time and work. Because of that though she can do it from pretty much anywhere because there's always a post office somewhere and her "store" is online. Depending on what you sell it does take some storage room, she does mainly clothes which take a fair bit of space, but there are niche items too. Imagine all the varied things you can find traveling all over. Just a thought.
 
bullfrog said:
Check out seasonal jobs with housing at coolworks.com maybe you could try being nomadic for a few months at a time until you have enough savings to buy what you need and see what others do.
Thank you for your response.  I've been watching YouTube videos and learning a bit here and there.  I want to try and stay nearby and continue my job if at all possible through the seasons.  I am saving up and trying to learn more.  Thanks for sharing that website...I'll check it out!
 
Fandrel64 said:
I'm 57. I've spent my whole life doing for others and caring for others and carrying the burden of others on my shoulders because it was my job, or it was family, or because of a sense of obligation. My kids are grown, I'm the oldest of any of my family and everyone else has passed, I still have my house and a lot of inherited things to deal with that for years have held me back and held me down. Recently though I've decided to stop letting all of that run my life and to do for me and live for me.

If I can do it you can too!

Another income stream that you might consider is reselling. My daughter does it and does pretty well with it. Basically she finds things at thrift and discount stores and yard sales and other places that she knows people are looking for and will pay decent money for (there are websites out there that actually list what's in demand). Not the same as "resellers" who buy all of a brand new thing and hold people for ransom for stupid scalped prices, she does it fair and still does well because not everyone has time to search for things and it's worth it to them to pay for found things. Basically all you really need is an "eye" for the right things, a place online to sell them, and places to mail them from. It does take consistent time and work. Because of that though she can do it from pretty much anywhere because there's always a post office somewhere and her "store" is online. Depending on what you sell it does take some storage room, she does mainly clothes which take a fair bit of space, but there are niche items too. Imagine all the varied things you can find traveling all over. Just a thought.
Thanks for your response and encouragement!  Congrats on your new found freedom!  I will certainly be looking into many different opportunities.  Right now I plan to stay at my job as long as I can.  But I'm still keeping my options open.
Many blessings!
Phyllis
 
Welcome to the forum fellow Pennsylvanian. I was born and raised in central Pennsylvania and now I’m a 65-year-old nomad with a permanent address in Lebanon Pennsylvania. That address is just a mailbox. I part time do the van camping for many years That address is just a mailbox. I part time van camper and state park Campos for many year. Because of my health problems the state park doesn’t allow me to host anymore.

I’ve been full-time in this van now for a year. In order to stay cool I get up in the mountains. At this point I’m in Perry County in the Tuscarora forest on free forest sites and sometimes at a cousins cabin, still in my van but at her property. I spent the winter in Florida and was planning to spend most of the summer in Maine but gas prices are too high to do that. I had a accident that’s going to cost me $1600 to get the van inspected. Inspection runs out November. The van is drivable just not going to passed inspection.

My health problems are multiple I’ve had many people tell me I’m a fool for trying to do something like this. I was even in a personal care home for a year, it drove me crazy. I just had to get out.My family it’s not real supportive of what I do but I haven’t had a lot of resistance from them. Four of my five children don’t communicate with me so they don’t argue about my lifestyle. My mom is still alive she thinks I’m nuts. ( of course she’s right).

I’m not gonna go into all the details of my health problems but basically the message is similar to the others “if I can do it you can do it.” I don’t have AC in the van at all so it’s the mountains and the trees that help me survive the heat and it’s Florida that helps me survive the winter. PA state forestry department has many free campsites available. You have to have a permit and you can stay seven days at one side and then move on to another.

If you don’t mind let me know what area PA you’re in. If you don’t want that to be on this public forum you can PM me here. Maybe we’re close enough to get together. If you’re so minded.

My suggestion about your daughter is get her to see some of these videos of successful van dwellers. There are so many of us out here doing it. If she sees some examples she might lighten up and see the possibilities for you.

Be encouraged, stick around this forum, maybe even share this forum with your daughter. And again welcome to our forum
 
consider offering your caregiver services for a Ride Along room and board and maybe some salary with some folks that are already traveling so you can get a feel for the lifestyle with no major commitment. when I hit the road my plan is to live in the cargo trailer and have a truck camper that the caregiver could live in. would offer free room and board plus some pay. somebody else is got to be thinking the same way right now.
 
Living in a van in a cold climate is not a happy situation. I would not advise living in Pennsylvania in a van during winter. I do understand not wanting to live in a room, but the whole point of having a van to live in is to be able to get out and see things and migrate to warmer climates in the winter or cooler climates in the summer.

I was in North Idaho in 2019 and it snowed on September 28 and stormed for days and I was not prepared... my van was new at that time, and uninsulated, and I had no heater. I bought a buddy heater (propane) but it was not easily usable... dangerous to use with window rolled up and then when I rolled down the window more cold air got in. Plus it created condensation which is dangerous for the van. It was the most miserable experience, and I don't recommend it. Even with insulation, it is too cold to live in a snowy climate.

I hope you will be able to migrate if you become a vandweller - but it sounds like you want to stay there for your job right now.

As for your daughter's opinion - you get to make your own decisions. We're adults and don't need children to tell us what to do or how to live. Be as adventurous as you like. You may have problems with it but then again, you can have problems living anywhere.
 
Does your job provide anything toward your retirement, or offer other benefits that make staying there worthwhile? If not, why stay there? In today's climate, you should be able to find a caregiver job almost anywhere, which would allow you to be a seasonal traveler, following cooler, or warmer, weather.
As for your daughter's opinion, it's just that, her opinion. I like the idea above of showing her vanlife videos. There are many women much older than you who live the nomad life, and many have youtube channels. Of course, she'll still worry about you, but after a while she'd see that you are happy and doing well, and that should be what matters.
 
What will you have for a rig to live out of? Most of us did not start out in a fully tricked out camper van, but can give you how -to advice for living out if a variety of vehicles. 
-crofter
 
Fandrel64 said:
I'm 57. I've spent my whole life doing for others and caring for others and carrying the burden of others on my shoulders because it was my job, or it was family, or because of a sense of obligation. My kids are grown, I'm the oldest of any of my family and everyone else has passed, I still have my house and a lot of inherited things to deal with that for years have held me back and held me down. Recently though I've decided to stop letting all of that run my life and to do for me and live for me.

If I can do it you can too!

Another income stream that you might consider is reselling. My daughter does it and does pretty well with it. Basically she finds things at thrift and discount stores and yard sales and other places that she knows people are looking for and will pay decent money for (there are websites out there that actually list what's in demand). Not the same as "resellers" who buy all of a brand new thing and hold people for ransom for stupid scalped prices, she does it fair and still does well because not everyone has time to search for things and it's worth it to them to pay for found things. Basically all you really need is an "eye" for the right things, a place online to sell them, and places to mail them from. It does take consistent time and work. Because of that though she can do it from pretty much anywhere because there's always a post office somewhere and her "store" is online. Depending on what you sell it does take some storage room, she does mainly clothes which take a fair bit of space, but there are niche items too. Imagine all the varied things you can find traveling all over. Just a thought.
I would like to know about some of those websites
 
No problem here, I was working on my travel trailer while talking about being full time nomadic in it I had already sold my house and gotten rid of most of mt stuff at that point in time. When my son got laid off his wife convinced him to sell their house, their stuff, buy a trailer and hit the road full time.

Just tell your daughter you are setting a good example of how to live a healthy , independent, adventur ous but sane life that is not focused on consumerism. That someday later in life she will come understand an havhing d appreciate your sensible approach to retirement years rather than become a dependent on her generosity to help support you in your dotage. It is up to parents to set a good example for their children's future happiness. :)
 
Just explain to your kids that it is how you want to have some adventure into your retirement years before you can't.....you do have to take advantage of your health now and if it is what you want, you go for it and another thing is you can tell her you will check in, send emails along the way, face time and show her all your adventures and your route and more and she can see you are doing just fine! Go for it.....and enjoy it!
 
Hi all,
I am just beginning to look for a van and seriously looking into van life. I'm 62, still working. I've worked all my life and never gotten above poverty level. I've always worked as a caregiver, which pays little, but I've enjoyed my work and I was good at it.
What has me down right now is my daughter constantly telling me what a bad idea it is for me to think about living in a van, and how because of my health and things this is crazy. She thinks I should rent a room somewhere, or get a room mate and rent a place. Both of these things are still very expensive for me, and I wouldn't feel comfortable. I feel like I would just be working to sleep in a place with furniture. I'm just feel discouraged. Of course it's scary to try something new, but I want to try. I want to spend my life living, not just staying "safer".
If anyone has been through this kind of thing with their kids and can share some encouragement, please let me hear from you. Also, anyone in the Pennsylvania region with tips for winter and summer...love to hear from you too. Anyone know about a decent van for cheap??? :)
Hope to hear from you! Blessings!
Phyllis
Phyllis: Here is your knight in really dull armor.
I'm really old. (83) but healthy. Like you I'm at my end. Well not my end but maybe at a sharp bend in life. My wife died on me almost 2 years ago from a stroke. Darn near starved myself from sorrow. Thank goodness for neighbors and head shrinks and canned food. (long story).
here's the deal. Don't buy anything. The northern states use a form of salt in winter. Everything goes to pot in a hurry and new vehicles are way to expensive. Even used one's these days are a rip off.
Here is an offer without burning bridges. I am half of a team. Can't cook, don't like to cook. I can eat most anything, except plastic. I have an old rusty pickup and really nice camper trailer with everything a home would have, Kitchen, living room, Bathroom, bed room(s) Running hot and cold water and so on. but limited storage space. At the end of March or April I'm taking off alone, away from memories and reminders of a life that has now ended, to embark on a new adventure. I say NUTS to being in an old fart rut. Wanna join me for a trial run? "There is nothing to fear but fear it's self is an old saying" I think Teddy Roosevelt.
By the way, that's me in the picture along with my wife. Ain't she beautiful.
Here is my Email. I'm in Michigan [email protected]
Ken
 
I’m nearly 59 years old. No complaints about life at all. I have a wife, two teen aged sons, and two border collies. I outright own my house on my acre and a quarter. We are happy and stable.

However, if I could find a sliver sides bus and refit it, I’d be happy to be on the road permanently. This idea is really complicated for my family right now, though.

I’m quite sure that I’d sell out and hit the road if I didn’t have the responsibilities to my family that I do have.

Well, that’s what I’d do. I’ve lived my life so far under the idea that it’s up to the living to keep on living, even after our loved ones die. Anything less than that, and more than one person died, as I see it.
 
Phyllis: Here is your knight in really dull armor.
I'm really old. (83) but healthy. Like you I'm at my end. Well not my end but maybe at a sharp bend in life. My wife died on me almost 2 years ago from a stroke. Darn near starved myself from sorrow. Thank goodness for neighbors and head shrinks and canned food. (long story).

This is your Ham callsign isn't it? Is the Cheese Museum still there in Pinconning? I had a buddy I served with from there - F-111 Aardvark navigator, his callsign was "Psycho" if that gives you a clue :D. Anyway, this lady you're replying to hasn't posted since 28 Jun of last year so don't be disappointed if you don't get a reply. You sound as if you really are at the end of your rope but make sure you take a moment to review your plans to ensure you're not going to just hastily do something without thinking it through. It's the worst thing you can do - especially if you're a little long in the tooth.

Make sure you at least have a destination in mind, research it for a good RV park or campground there as well as on the way down. Have a route in mind and make sure your family knows what it is and your schedule to keep tabs on you. I understand you were a long haul trucker so I can't give you any advice you haven't already long known but I just urge you to take your time and really prepare before you do this. Waiting till spring might give you more time to think and get ready. I'm familiar with the conditions up there, I regularly deployed to the Grayling USAF Bombing Range near Alpena from Hawaii of all places. For what it's worth, I know how it feels to lose your spouse, I'm 60 and she died 5 years ago at age 47. It was/is tough but you've got to go on, she'd want that.

As for cooking, try something in a crockpot, it's foolproof, toss in some veggies on the bottom (so they'll cook through) , throw a chuck roast on top with whatever seasonings ( an envelope of Lipton Golden Onion soup is great, cover, cook on low for about 8 hours and you have several good meals if you add bread. Breakfast - Puffy baked omelette - heat your oven to 350, spray a 9" round glass casserole dish w Pam, beat 4 eggs in a bowl, add 1 tablespoon milk per egg, wisk, add a handful of shredded cheese, and one of diced ham, mix and pour into casserole. Bake for 25 min or until a butterknife stuck in the center comes out clean. slice and serve. Add toast and coffee for a good breakfast w leftovers. Total hands on time for both recipes is about 10 min. I wish you luck!

Cheers!

J
 
I’m nearly 59 years old. No complaints about life at all. I have a wife, two teen aged sons, and two border collies. I outright own my house on my acre and a quarter. We are happy and stable.

However, if I could find a sliver sides bus and refit it, I’d be happy to be on the road permanently. This idea is really complicated for my family right now, though.

I’m quite sure that I’d sell out and hit the road if I didn’t have the responsibilities to my family that I do have.

Well, that’s what I’d do. I’ve lived my life so far under the idea that it’s up to the living to keep on living, even after our loved ones die. Anything less than that, and more than one person died, as I see it.
Aim High!
 
This is your Ham callsign isn't it? Is the Cheese Museum still there in Pinconning? I had a buddy I served with from there - F-111 Aardvark navigator, his callsign was "Psycho" if that gives you a clue :D. Anyway, this lady you're replying to hasn't posted since 28 Jun of last year so don't be disappointed if you don't get a reply. You sound as if you really are at the end of your rope but make sure you take a moment to review your plans to ensure you're not going to just hastily do something without thinking it through. It's the worst thing you can do - especially if you're a little long in the tooth.

Make sure you at least have a destination in mind, research it for a good RV park or campground there as well as on the way down. Have a route in mind and make sure your family knows what it is and your schedule to keep tabs on you. I understand you were a long haul trucker so I can't give you any advice you haven't already long known but I just urge you to take your time and really prepare before you do this. Waiting till spring might give you more time to think and get ready. I'm familiar with the conditions up there, I regularly deployed to the Grayling USAF Bombing Range near Alpena from Hawaii of all places. For what it's worth, I know how it feels to lose your spouse, I'm 60 and she died 5 years ago at age 47. It was/is tough but you've got to go on, she'd want that.

As for cooking, try something in a crockpot, it's foolproof, toss in some veggies on the bottom (so they'll cook through) , throw a chuck roast on top with whatever seasonings ( an envelope of Lipton Golden Onion soup is great, cover, cook on low for about 8 hours and you have several good meals if you add bread. Breakfast - Puffy baked omelette - heat your oven to 350, spray a 9" round glass casserole dish w Pam, beat 4 eggs in a bowl, add 1 tablespoon milk per egg, wisk, add a handful of shredded cheese, and one of diced ham, mix and pour into casserole. Bake for 25 min or until a butterknife stuck in the center comes out clean. slice and serve. Add toast and coffee for a good breakfast w leftovers. Total hands on time for both recipes is about 10 min. I wish you luck!

Cheers!

J
Not half cocked. Spent 6 years 6 months and 23 days in your mans navy. I know that i I can not plan for everything. Over all, I am planning on following the warm weather.
Giving up on life is behind me now, i am again awake and looking ahead. Amazing what them shrinks can do. Yes I am a ham. Keeping up with technology is almost a full time job. I don't fire up much, more into building stuff. Started young with 2 bit code, now 256 bit and 512 bit and so on.
I'm ok and planning. Thanks for the reply
Ken
 
Hi all,
I am just beginning to look for a van and seriously looking into van life. I'm 62, still working. I've worked all my life and never gotten above poverty level. I've always worked as a caregiver, which pays little, but I've enjoyed my work and I was good at it.
What has me down right now is my daughter constantly telling me what a bad idea it is for me to think about living in a van, and how because of my health and things this is crazy. She thinks I should rent a room somewhere, or get a room mate and rent a place. Both of these things are still very expensive for me, and I wouldn't feel comfortable. I feel like I would just be working to sleep in a place with furniture. I'm just feel discouraged. Of course it's scary to try something new, but I want to try. I want to spend my life living, not just staying "safer".
If anyone has been through this kind of thing with their kids and can share some encouragement, please let me hear from you. Also, anyone in the Pennsylvania region with tips for winter and summer...love to hear from you too. Anyone know about a decent van for cheap??? :)
Hope to hear from you! Blessings!
Phyllis


While I'm not in your shoes and advice can be a real slippery thing to give. There is a pretty fine line between a nomad and someone up shitcreek and homeless. I think a little bit of savings is what largely makes up that line. I think bullfrog had some good advice in that if you decide to hit the road, I would already have the job lined up and be heading for it when you finally "shove off."
 
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