Getting Nervous

[VanLifeCrisis]

So Ive successfully vandwelled for 2 years now, and all and all i think it went well.   Ive been working and stationary though, which wasn't exactly the dream.  So i finally decided this year I am heading out, for better or worse.  Id like to have a better vehicle, but i realize it will be a trap that will keep staring at the same 4 brown paneled walls Ive been staring at in my office for the last 10 years.  I think the van will at least be safe to drive now with new tires and shocks (noticeable difference), just add a brake job before i head out.  

Holy crap, ive been working here TEN YEARS.  

Everyone thinks im crazier for considering leaving such a 'good easy job' than i was for vandwelling.  I dont get paid much, but i dont do much either and work alone, with internet and tv.     But I want to see more in life than just these brown walls.  Sure the wv mountains are beautiful but ive seen them for thousands of days and nights.  That said, part of me feels they are right and the more i consider im nervous.

Not just about leaving my job, but just where to go and what to do.  I know, for some people that is the cool part, but when i try to think where i will actually go (this winter...id like to be in warm climate for once in my life), I haven't the foggiest idea.  Having too much freedom is scary too, it would appear.

 

[GotSmart]

Quartzite.  

Not to hot, and no frozen stuff falling from the sky.

 

[VanLifeCrisis]

I definitely want to get there, I suppose that could be my long term goal since i'm on the east coast.

 

[SoulRaven]

Could you do your current job remotely? That might be an interesting option and open up a lot of possibilities for you...

 

[VanLifeCrisis]

Unfortunately no, I work at an old motel. The pay is 10 an hour, which isnt much these days, but it doesn't require much work to do. Im not worried too much about losing this job, i guess its fear of the unknown. But i know in the past, the best times were had outside my comfort zone.

 

[Optimistic Paranoid]

Is your parting of the ways going to be amiable?  Will you be able to get good references from them?  If it was me, I'd go out of my way to leave on good terms, maybe offer to train your replacement.  I'd ask for a letter of reference to take with you.

It sounds like the kind of job that has a lot of turnover.  With good references, you ought to be able to find a similar job anywhere in the country.

Maybe plan to spend six months or so in each locale, thoroughly exploring it on your days off, before moving on to a different locale?

Regards
John

 

[VanLifeCrisis]

Good thoughts i will be leaving on good terms.

But i dont want to settle down for so long anywhere, too easy to fall back into a ten year rut lol Im thinking i might head south to florida, then creep west from there. I will have some money for a while at least, and ideas to make more.

 

[GotSmart]

Just stay away from Waco TX.

 

[Patrick46]

A friend of mine (RIP) had the same mill job for nearly 25 years. Showed up for work one day to find a notice on the time clock stating that they were closing the mill. (they so kindly offered to re-train him for something else)
He was 3 years away from retirement!

He said "Skrew It!...I'm never working for one place for more than 5 years ever again!"

Spent the next 5 years driving a log truck, then the next 5 working for an environmental service, and then went commercial fishing which is where he finally did retire from. He was very happy he did things this way, and wished he'd had started much earlier doing so.

Don't worry. If you wanna work, there will always be jobs needing to be filled.

 

[dragonflyinthesky]

What ever you decide to do, and I do hope you get the courage up to take off, good luck to you. I have mentioned here and there on the forum all of my fears in taking off and hitting the road, as well as fears that I still have on occasion, especially after I first took off. They never came true, nor did all the horrible things friends and family warned me about.

Every day I wake up feeling free and blessed and I don't wake up with anxiety attacks and not being able to breath anymore. Believe it or not, most nights I sleep thru and don't even get up to go potty. Somehow my sleep patterns have improved and I wake up rested and feeling the wind go through my camper and to the sounds of birds and bugs.

Diane

 

[ttpadilla]

Don't worry, everything you're feeling is completely normal, and those of us who have taken the leap know exactly what you're going through. When the time came for me to leave, I had no idea where I was going immediately, either, and so much freedom seemed more like a burden than a blessing at first. But, even though things haven't gone all that smoothly all the time, I have not once ever wished I'd stayed stuck. It's been 8 weeks since I left my "steady $12/hour job" and I think you're right not to stay too long in one place from here on out. Complacency is an easy trap to fall into.

Set a date for your departure, not too far in the future, and keep us posted.

 

[ilovemyvan]

VanLifeCrisis,

This is so weird, Let me explain. I used to participate on the old site. You were still fixing your van then. When the new site rolled in I didn't re-registered. Recently when I came back I was please to see that you were still doing fine but sorry for you that you had too many bad things happened to you that stopped you from going away.

Two days ago, out of the blue I thought about you....that's the weird part. I have no idea why you just popped into my mind. I started to think about your comments to Casey about his new life and I thought that you too were due for a new life. I'm not in the habit of thinking about people from the internet I don't really know, so you can understand why this wonderful decision on yours is kind of blowing me away. It will be disorienting at first not to have a schedule but that's also what will make it so great. You're doing the right thing.

You won't regret it, I'm 100% sure!!!!!!!!!!

Nicole

 

[VanLifeCrisis]

Thanks for the encouragement! I will be leaving this autumn i think. i promised my boss i would wait until vacations were over, she is also a friend so i know shes been planning it for a while. her and i run the place basically, so if we are both gone its a pickle. ill just bank cushion and sew up loose ends in the mean time,.
Im feeling much better about it.

 

[akrvbob]

When wild animals are born into captivity at a gut level they they hate being caged but know nothing else so are reluctant to leave when given the chance.

That's what you are feeling! It will probably take some time, but you'll get over it!!!

If freedom is unbearable for you, try to punch a cop in the face and you can go back to those same 4 walls and 3 squares a day. Then you'll feel at home again!
Bob

 

[HarmonicaBruce]

Be sure to sign up for unemployment.  Florida is the plan if you're on the east coast.  Join the Eagles, Moose, VFW, etc and you can van camp all over for cheap or free.

 

[VanLifeCrisis]

Bob, if i did that i might end up in a really tight place, 6 feet under lol

 

[One Awesome Inch]

I think as long as you have a few thousand dollar emergency fund stashed in a bank, you'll be fine.

Best of luck!

 

[rvwandering]

So happy to see this post. You'll be fine!

 

[Rugster]

Hey, when you make it to Florida, I'll buy you a coffee or something. I owe you for pointing me in the direction of the Street Musicians blog