Are we running away?

[Dingfelder]

I've been there, Starr, as a caretaker and guardian/conservator for the elderly, son to a diagnosed narcissist as well as a crummy step parent, and friend to a number of elderly people slipping into dementia, sometimes I feel there's hardly a moment where I'm not caring for someone or even having a normal conversation. Hold on for the day you can make your move, and don't give up on making it.

I think that's the only way people in that situation are likely to improve it: they just have to make some hard decisions and move on. Because you can't change the whole world around you, but you can find a different one, and some are definitely better than others.

I've taken a few first steps and am hoping to get into the nomadic lifestyle myself. It will be a long road for me, but I'll get there.

 

[closeanuf]

If I don't take care of me who will?  Comes a time when you figure that out and guess what?  All those people you think couldn't get along with out you manage to do so.  It's just easier to let Mom or Dad do it, and you've let them get away with long enough.  

PS  I don't want you to think I'm an asshole; I want you to KNOW I'm an asshole.  Just ask my step kids if you don't believe me.

 

[Starr]

I've been there, Starr, as a caretaker and guardian/conservator for the elderly, son to a diagnosed narcissist as well as a crummy step parent, and friend to a number of elderly people slipping into dementia, sometimes I feel there's hardly a moment where I'm not caring for someone or even having a normal conversation.  Hold on for the day you can make your move, and don't give up on making it.  

I think that's the only way people in that situation are likely to improve it:  they just have to make some hard decisions and move on.  Because you can't change the whole world around you, but you can find a different one, and some are definitely better than others.

I've taken a few first steps and am hoping to get into the nomadic lifestyle myself.  It will be a long road for me, but I'll get there.

You summed it up beautifully Dingfinger! I hope your journey is sooner than you think.

 

[Starr]

If I don't take care of me who will?  Comes a time when you figure that out and guess what?  All those people you think couldn't get along with out you manage to do so.  It's just easier to let Mom or Dad do it, and you've let them get away with long enough.  

PS  I don't want you to think I'm an asshole; I want you to KNOW I'm an asshole.  Just ask my step kids if you don't believe me.

I don't think that at all closeanuf. Actually my oldest daughter tells me I can't keep doing this and that I need to stop worrying about those who do not care enough to realize what they are doing to me.

 

[CityWoman]

Sorry for stealing but yes great topic, are we running away? I might be just not ready to admit it meaning failure which is unacceptable. My cat is looking at me as I type but the feeling is Yes I am running away. As sad as that is to admit.

I must admit, I don't really understand your post nor the purpose of this thread.  I am not sure what you mean by "sorry for stealing" and you sound rather unhappy or exasperated with yourself when you say running away = failure = unacceptable = sad to admit.

Who is the "we" you are asking about in "are we running away?"  What are you trying to figure out? What are you looking for? I'm sorry, but your post just confuses me.

 

[Regie]

I don't agree. It involves a lot of courage and mental strength to left your old life and boundaries behind and start a new one. Also, you're going to meet lots of issues and troubles you've never heard before. So it's not a running away. It's a mental growth as you slowly progressing, learning and exploring.

 

[Moxadox]

I don't agree. It involves a lot of courage and mental strength to left your old life and boundaries behind and start a new one. Also, you're going to meet lots of issues and troubles you've never heard before. So it's not a running away. It's a mental growth as you slowly progressing, learning and exploring.

I agree with you 100%. This nomadic lifestyle requires a tremendous amount of courage. It's not running away. OK, maybe it could be, but you still have to live in the moment and think on your feet, All. The. Time. Not for the faint of heart!

I cared for my father until he passed in 2014, then bought a van and lit a shuck out of that place, leaving my horrid abusive mother behind. I'm planning to visit her for the first time in over 2 years, dreading the whole thing. I will feel less guilty for having visited, I'm sure, but the psychic beating is going to be brutal. After which, I'll feel all the more justified in leaving again. I wish I could learn not to feel guilty.

The Dire Wolfess

 

[RoamerRV428]

It is up to the person to be running from something in their life and then they find they are running toward something in their life.
It isn't the same for everyone at what point in their journey in life they are at. There is no set in stone answer.

Where you are and why you are making a nomadic life your choice is too personal to say we all fit into one slot and no one can be labeled as running away or running toward cause everyone is at different crossroads. Which is 100% ok