Venting - New set of expenses

[JuliaAnne2018]

I just need to vent about money for a minute.

I don't plan on traveling far just sticking in my immediate area for now. I make about $1000/month right now but now have a whole new set of expenses now that I'm preparing to travel for a while. Gotta buy things for the road to stay safe and still pay rent at least for one more month aargh.

Too much to think about sometimes especially with still having to get a mailing address. But I already invested in about $400 worth of equipment since June, and I also invested in other emergency supplies I already stored up these past few years, so I have no choice but to go with it. No turning back now. If I hadn't decided to do this, I'd get by okay living in my apartment, but what scared me is an expense last month I really didn't have the disposable income for being my first month on my own in years. (My S.O. had to go to a nursing home, and being in his life still, that's another reason I'm camping close to town.)

Other than that, I always had the urge to just "pick up and take off" since my early 20s but always felt I had something holding me back. Usually fear of how I was going to live.

I'm not as afraid now about 20 years later, but I am frustrated that no matter what I decide, it's going to cost money.





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[Zil]

Sorry to hear about your friend. Remember most nursing homes take good care of their guests. You should not be obligated to contribute any money.

 

[JuliaAnne2018]

No I don't have to contribute money. It's a long story. There's limits being placed as to how often I ger to see him and so on, and but I decided no point in staying in this place w all this stuff just the dog and me. But the expenses I'm talking about are the ones I have preparing for life in my car.

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[John61CT]

Investments in a future life, one that will give more pleasure, and more disposable income by eliminating the rent.

Delay anything non-essential, some things can be put off, others can't.

 

[becida]

Too much stuff can be a problem living in a vehicle...it has been for me. A tough one to get over too!

Good luck!

 

[Firtree]

Watch the YouTube with Suanne and Bob on Essentials for vehicle living. You should be able to outfit your vehicle for $200-300, even less using stuff you have already, maybe some thrift store, yard sale items. If you are trying to build a house on wheels it will be costly, heavy for the vehicle and you’ll want to toss it all out two months into your travels.

The dog needs a leash, bowl, bed and kibble. You need about the same plus a few clothes, mug, knife, fork, spoon. This is not crossing a 1000 miles of prairie with no towns, stores, Walmart’s, thrift stores. If your house or apartment disappeared, poof, today you could get in your vehicle with the stuff you have in your wallet, clothes on back, dog and supplies already in vehicle and be off. Don’t make this hard or costly

 

[JuliaAnne2018]

I think some people got the impression I was going to take all my stuff with me. No. LOL I was saying I realize I have no need for this place and this 2-bedroom apartment and most of the stuff in it for just my dog and me. I gotta make sure my dog doesn't bake or freeze to death. I'll be getting rid of most of the stuff, and there items I might need that I wouldn't know where to find in a regular store. I work a lot and haven't got much free time to shop. Therefore, I want to still be able to shop online.

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[bullfrog]

What kind of limits is the nursing home putting on visitation? I would think they would welcome someone watching over their loved one. When my dad was in his final days I stayed with him 24/7 for weeks. Even some medical facilites used to have camper spaces for out of town visitors years ago when I checked. Have things changed so much? Are they enforcing visitation hours? Can you not stay in the parking lot to sleep?

 

[JuliaAnne2018]

This kind off topic now.LOL My reason for leaving my apartment is that he is not here anymore. It's a long story. In some cases, and I'm not the only one this happened to, family takes too much control over the situation.

I'm not going to get into details. I just can't see him as much as I'd like. And I know another lady in a FB group I'm that this happened to. And sometimes even one family member will prohibit another family member just to be mean. I researched a lot of caaes like this...

But me taking time to travel gave me something to look forward to. He might be in a restrictive environment soon, too, so that might help...

But again, this was not the orginal topic of this post.

I just needed to vent about how I still have to spend money even though as of either this month or next I will no longer have rent.

No matter what I do, it always costs money.


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[bullfrog]

Sorry about your situation. I traveled to be with my dad and was able to basically live at the facility while there at little or no cost, I was thinking you could do the same until you could get set up to travel.

 

[JuliaAnne2018]

I highly doubt that will happen,

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[OregonDeb]

As you infer everything has a cost - financial or emotional.

Regardless of whether you stay close to town or hit the road remember to take care of yourself and have a nest egg to cover the unexpected expenses.

Good luck in the next chapter of your life.

 

[Dingfelder]

What kind of limits is the nursing home putting on visitation?  I would think they would welcome someone watching over their loved one.  When my dad was in his final days I stayed with him 24/7 for weeks.  Even some medical facilites used to have camper spaces for out of town visitors years ago when I checked.  Have things changed so much?  Are they enforcing visitation hours?  Can you not stay in the parking lot to sleep?

A foster or nursing home is a state- and county-licensed business and has insurance and licensing issues and regulations.  It may be a home in the neighborhood, but is not and cannot be run like a friend's house.  They can't allow people besides their charges to live on-site.  It isn't even allowed by some HOA's (many if not most are in residential neighborhoods) or by some city laws.

Regarding visitors, it's a terrible idea for clients, especially new clients, to see them much at first.  The first few weeks to couple of months, the client has to get used to the new circumstances and so do his or her loved ones.  Frequent visits early on lead to huge emotional scenes that can be devastating to the client and family/friends and lead to hopes and even promises of removal by the distraught family and friends.  The guilt level is out of this world and extremely hard to take in an already emotionally very difficult situation.  What the client needs is time to settle in, not ever-renewed hope of escape or a feeling that they need to beg for forgiveness or make promises or threats or manipulate.  Indeed, it is not rare that mobile elders are flight risks and need to be in locked facilities for their owns safety, lest they wander the streets and get lost, hit by a car, subject to falls or other injury, wander in and out of other people's houses, miss vital medications and monitoring, or even die of exposure.  

These matters are very difficult.  Rest assured that trained and licensed professionals know what they are doing and overwhelmingly tend to be exceptionally kind, patient, and engaging people.  Clients are kept clean (often much cleaner than they have been for years), well-fed (ditto), and medically well-monitored and treated (ditto again).  Things are made the best for residents that they can be and often have been for years.  

Family should be there for each other, and so should friends.  And when a person gets to a foster or nursing home, it means life must and should be lived differently.  It's time.

 

[Dingfelder]

Re costs, I know what you mean. I watch youtube videos and they are always talking about repairing their RV's and vans and the tools you need or that at least it would be excellent to have. Unfortunately, some cost a lot of money, all take up space and weigh something -- sometimes a lot. Getting yourself well set-up is indeed expensive. I have racked up a lot of expense since getting my trailer simply so that I can more safely be on the road and be prepared to live reasonably well while there -- everything from a drill to a shade tent to portable toilet facilities (in case I'm not moving my trailer for a while, which I am not) to portable shower facilities (not using my tanks at all) to a wifi extender to a chocks and blocks wheel kit ... it goes on and on, and that's before we even get into the optional like a water filtering system and a mat to put outside the door to keep the dust and dirt more manageable, etc. It adds up to quite a lot of money, very quickly.

If you're in a car, you can't hold as much and need to buy less, but on the other hand, have even less space to put what you do buy. Getting started is not easy and depending what you buy, is not cheap if you want to maintain some level of comfort and cleanliness and simply have some way to keep clean and go to the bathroom.

 

[JuliaAnne2018]

A foster or nursing home is a state- and county-licensed business and has insurance and licensing issues and regulations.  It may be a home in the neighborhood, but is not and cannot be run like a friends house...

I didn't mean to get so deep into this and I could say some things right now in anger, but I am best better off keeping my mouth shut. The nursing home situation was just a passing comment, and the politics concerning thar I would rather not get into rught now. I'm going to reel this back to the original topic in that this new life I plan to pursue is not necessarily going to be cheaper than my current one.

 

[GotOldEarly]

Sorry about your situation.  I traveled to be with my dad and was able to basically live at the facility while there at little or no cost, I was thinking you could do the same until you could get set up to travel.

Is it possible to sell the STUFF you won't e taking with you to generate some funds for the thing you still need?

 

[JuliaAnne2018]

Is it possible to sell the STUFF you won't e taking with you to generate some funds for the thing you still need?

I am trying to do that. Not sure I have anything of value that anyone would want. But, I'll see.

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