I wanna cry but I’m to dehydrated..

[urbankid12]

How was your day? 

Hopefully better than mine. Woke up at a picnic area and it was pleasantly cool.. I was the only one there.. I’m getting used to that now..

The sun picked up quickly and I was forced out of the minivan from heat and the swam of flies that now come daily.. 

The heat and humidity are so high I can’t even think straight. Eventually as I near my 24 hour limit I break camp drenched in sweat simple because i started working in the sun, my dog is now panting under the fan I have set up for her .. I wonder how awful of a person I must be to subject my dog to this misery.. yet I don’t have a moments peace I gotta start the minivan and go... 

Driving down the road I wish I could at least enjoy the cool and relax for a moment but I can’t, swatting flies out the window is my goal .. they enjoy sitting my sweat drenched arms.. 

Upon my at the next rest stop I decided to clean out a section in hopes of attracting less flies tommarrow. Clearly I angered them and they started biting me or maybe that was in my head.. I could be  hallucinating  Perhaps.. 

I sit inside for a moment and finally decided I had enough, I grab my scrub brush and make it my honorary fly swatter. 1,2,3 I start to get them 14,15,16 I’m tired. 22,23,24 I just want to rest and cook a mean, I had skipped breakfast anywhere just a few snacks. 33,34,35 I’m exhausted I can’t keep it up.. by the time the falling sun fades I top out at 38, I killed 38 flies! Possibly more  but I only count the ones I see dead. 

Even before I see my last fly of the day night shift tormentors are arriving.  Mosquitos! I saw a few and get them as the pile up on the ceiling I’m to exhausted to put up the front window screens again and keep the door closed on the once again hot minivan.. 

My ideas of cooking a mean seem to much work let alone unappealing since fly and mosquito guts cake the walls.. 

I feel like crying, I did that twice today but I don’t think I have the energy to do it again.. what did I accomplish today? Nothing just wasted time, wasted gas, and didn’t make any money. 

Minivan life in the winter was glorious, I’m finding it’s miserable in summer. I never felt more worthless in my entire life.. sending out job applications even rejection from Walmart when they are desperate for workers.. I don’t qualify to put goods on shelves for 13.00 an hour? ( hopefully 13.35 since I have a bachelors degree)  

If it wasn’t for my dog I wouldn’t have any purpose or point in my life.. 

I might have to rehome her if I can’t figure this out.. then I literally have nothing and no hope left.. 

*sigh*

If anyone else is having a bad day feel free to share and talk... or maybe I’m the only one? 

I think I’m heading back to New Mexico while I keep job hunting online.. the check engine light is on for The Cadillac converter I don’t know if I can survive a breakdown at such a low point in my life.. 

Maybe sharing my misery will make somebody else feel better? Maybe that was my purpose today? Maybe I did accomplish something... or maybe I just spammed valuable forum with my endlessly complaining. 

I better go gotta swat more flies then sponge bath and get ready for the flies again tomorrow... I must be doing something so incredibly wrong..

 

[bullfrog]

This is the reason we take seasonal jobs with full hookups or housing. It was 107 degrees here today, just praying our AC can make it another season. Not everybody gets to follow the cool weather and stay in bug free nose bleed elevations. Try calling Aramark HR or any of the many listed in coolworks.com that have listings in the Jobs Now section.

 

[Malamute]

You mentioned not getting responses to applications. If I may make a suggestion, if you are young, get with someone a bit more experienced in writing resumes to shine and polish yours up.some. Experience in such matters can make a difference.

I'll venture a guess that somebody here may be willing to give you a hand if youre open to the idea.

Best of luck in getting a good summer gig lined out.

Edit: a wrist cord for a fly swatter makes it easier in camp to have it handy when needed. Paper towels with disinfectant cleans up fly guts and makes the fly swatter hanging off your wrist less gross

 

[MG1912]

I just read through your entire posting history here. It’s clear that your stress has gradually metastasized to Jurassic proportions since the spring. Take very good care of your emotional health right now, friend. I don’t know your circumstances or background, but I would be remiss not to recommend that you consider "resetting." That could mean going “back home” and staying with family for a while until you can make your next move. But the constant and compounding stress, while you are frequently feeling overwhelmed, is going to eventually break you unless you give yourself some relief very soon. That’s just my 2 cents. But if you are forced to stay where you are, or to stay mobile for the time being, I hope you are able to hold on for the short term and get the job you want and a good situation to deal with the weather for you and your dog!

You seem to really want someone to help you in your nomadic journey. I’ve seen incredible generosity and caring in this community, so you might get it here. But to me, it sounds like you need family right now, and I do hope you will reach out to such folks if you have them.

Back in March, highdesertranger invited you to join him on his trek to Oregon and teach you everything about boondocking, so you’ve gotten an extraordinary offer from this community. Did you take him up on that? I can’t think of a better guide for nomadic living than him.

 

[WanderingRose]

You don’t say where you are, but maybe there is a cooling center nearby that you can visit to give you a break from the heat related stress.

Reach out to a crisis line and talk through your options, please.

 

[maki2]

Why are you not putting screening over the window openings? There are videos on the CheapRVliving youtube channel that show how to make and install them

You also need to get some shade cloth for summer. A screen room is another good addition for summertime camping life.

Yes it takes an investment of some money and it takes a bit of labor to put things up and take them down but not large amounts of money or time. if there is any type of hardware store around you can solve the bugs in your vehicle issue in a very short time.

I can't solve your empolyment problem but I suggest you go to a location you like and hit the street looking for help wanted signs. if you are clean, tidy, friendly and personable you will find work. You might have to fill out dozens of applications and rejections can be tough but realize that job hunting is work and not particularly fun work, but it is essential work. Be sure you don't try to initiate contact during the rush hours of business or at opening and closing time. Introduce yourself, ask and use, as well as remember the name of the persons you speak with. Establishing good personal relationshps with owners and coworkers begins with the task of asking for a job.

 

[nature lover]

I say yay and amen to the screens. But I haven’t made mine yet even though I have what I need to make them. I guess I’m just lazy. If any kind of insect gets bad for me I use a repellent called DETER. Its all “natural”, Basically geranium and spearmint oils. And all natural so that I don’t worry about nasty chemicals. You may have to reapply every three hours or so but it keeps all of the biting and crawling creatures off of me very well. I was given a small battery powered mosquito trap that charges on USB. I’ve not been using it lately because I think the light might attract more mosquitoes into the van than it kills.

For the heat l have a fan that runs on a 20 V battery. All of the different companies make one like Dewalt and Milwaukee and others. I decided to invest in the Walmart hart brand. Knowing that Walmart is close at hand wherever you are, unfortunately for some. On the low setting a four amp 20 V battery will last 19 hours. And it has extremely better air moving power than those little USB fans which are almost worthless. The HART, Walmart, brand are about 1/3 less cost than the big guys. When I still was a home owner I had DeWalt tools. As a van dweller I don’t see the need for having the best and honestly I’m surprised at how the heart drill and other tools work. I have the drill an air compressor and the fan. I like them all. I have 2 4 amp batteries and one two amp battery. It would be nice to have a couple more batteries for Boondocking but they’re not cheap. But as I said earlier they cost less than the Dewalt system batteries.

MG 1912 had very good advice for you and dealing with stress. Maybe find a volunteer position somewhere like a church soup kitchen or thrift store. You can be inside out of the hot weather and Some would even let you take your pet in. I’m dealing with a huge amount of stress in my life and those little things like mosquitoes and flies driving you crazy. Can be indicators of a larger problem to deal with. I am by no means a mental health professional but I have spent lots of time with them. LOL I know what their answers may be like, and my rates are cheaper than theirs.

By all means the advice of hooking up with another nomad for a while can be a great stress reliever. If worst comes to worst you can slap each other around.

I do wish you success
to beat this stress.
You can do your best
And get help with the rest
As you follow this quest
Don’t settle for less

The above attempt at poetry is an indicator of the stress level I’m dealing with. . But what the heck I’ve been out of my mind for years.

 

[txmnjim]

i would have cried on a day like that too! good luck to you and i hope you find a job soon. MN is pretty nice
in the summer and lots of NF areas up north, but you already know that