investigator77
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- Jul 19, 2013
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You're right Brad, holidays are tough. When you're single after a certain age, it seems like we become one of the forgotten masses. I lost my parents 18 yrs ago (dad) and 8 yrs ago (mom). I still miss them. The dementia your father is experiencing is like a long slow death, so you are already going through the grieving process, because part of your relationship is already gone. Take this time to tell your dad all the things that you want to say, while he's still fairly well. I found that having my parents both die of asbestos related lung cancer, that at least we had the time to spend talking about the past, sharing the great memories, and letting them know how much they were loved. It was very difficult to watch them slowly fade away, especially once they were hospitalized, but I feel grateful that we had the time together. I can't imagine how hard it would be to lose a parent suddenly, and never have that chance to tell them how much they are loved, and say good-bye one last time.<br><br>After my mom died, my family all seemed to split apart. There was a big blow-up with my sister and 2 brothers, and things have never been the same. We used to all be so close, but now our kids are all grown up, and my brothers are grandparents themselves. They have their own lives, full of kids and grandkids, and both of them are married also, so now that my parents are gone, we are all the heads of our own families. I haven't heard from my sister in over a year. She also is married, and has turned really mean the older she gets, so I'm not that inclined to contact her very often. They just don't understand what it's like to live alone. I don't expect them to understand, but it would be nice if they did.<br><br>I only have one daughter, and she is married and lives about 50 minutes away. Between her dad & stepmom (who have a gorgeous cottage on a private lake), her in-laws (who have a gorgeous condo in Vancouver, B.C. and a gorgeous cottage here in Ontario), I'm usually the last to get any scraps of their time. They also informed me that they'll be flying to Vancouver for Christmas this year, so guess where that leaves me? Home alone. They are very busy with their jobs and their many friends. They socialize quite a bit, and every weekend they have plans. Even for their birthdays June 26th & 30th, I didn't get to see them until the 11th of July, and that was because I went there and took them out for dinner. Our visit lasted less than 3 hours, because it was a weeknight and they both had to work in the morning. I hate it, but it is what it is.<br><br>I've decided that I can't wait for other people to ask me to do things. I have to make my own life as a single person, and it's hard sometimes. I've been on my own for 8 yrs, and if I wait to have someone to do things with, I'll be waiting a LONG time. So I've decided to buy myself a used camper trailer, and start spending my summers up at the lake. I'm tired of being alone, and being in a trailer park from May to October will give me much needed socialization! One thing I know about campers is they love to show off their rigs, so I'm hoping that I'll meet all the other seasonal campers, and make some new friends for all year long. I'm just in the research stage right now, and having so much fun. It's nice to be excited about something again!<br><br>Regards,<br><a href="http://thoughtsfromalonelyplace.wordpress.com/2013/07/18/comparison-shopping-for-trailers/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Nancy</a>
